Mystery Science Theater En Masse (MST 'EM): Sequelitis
"In a screwed up distant future... on the edge of time and space..."

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Thought that the past could haunt them? Nope. This season will mostly be filled with sequels and spinoffs. Think you can follow a bunch of convoluted storylines with the riffers?

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Remember, I'm still using the Fiction ratings, so if you jumped here and never visited the Fanfiction section, here are the equivalents:
G = K
PG = K+
PG-13 = T
R = M
NC-17 = MA

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M78/B16 - The Power of Love (Dead or Alive fic by Alex118)
No, this has nothing to do with the Celine Dion song.
It's not love, it's nonsense. Prepare yourself for the constant shilling and declarations of "love" that will make your head spin. Also, prepare yourself for some unhealthy doses of protagonist centered morality and accidental misogyny. What do you expect? It's a Gary Stu fic. They have their own set of bad writing clichés in them. It's time to get annoyed, confused, and baffled with the fully set Black Crow.
Fic's Rating: T (though one certain scene should technically catapult it to M)
MST's Rating: M for language. Kyo, Jessie, and Cassy are the main offenders for that.
*This fic is the sequel to "All My Heart". If you haven't read that oneshot, get familiar with it here.*
*There will be extreme violence in some parts.*
Parts: One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six

M79/A16 - Thanksgiving! (Sonic fic by KRZR24)
Remember the terror that a certain Mary Sue caused to Sonic, Amy, and Tails? Well, she's unfortunately back... and she hasn't toned any of her heinous actions down. That's right, she's learned absolutely nothing, and she continues to get even worse about it. While this fic only has three measly chapters, it's still awful. The fully set Egg Spiral are ready for this short fic.
Yes, just about every character in this fic is still terrible in their own little way.
Fic's Rating: G for Godawful T
MST's Rating: T
*This fic is the sequel to "The New Girl" (the fic that was riffed in Season 7, not Season 5). If you haven't read the riffing of that horrible fic, you can do so by clicking here.*
*Because of the awful stereotypes and Sasha's actions in Part Two, it plops itself into "Epic Failure" territory.*
Parts: One  Two

M80/411 - Moonlight warrior (Sailor Moon fic by Benji Himura)
Remember when the Stu should've died? Yeah, too bad. He's saved from the brink of certain death... and then he proceeds to ram his inhuman sex organ right in the middle of Haruka and Michiru's relationship as thanks. Join Jessie, James, Miyuki, and Tomoko as they watch Michiru bawl her eyes out and proclaim her love for the Stu every five seconds. It gets worse. She and the Stu both treat Haruka like garbage in their own disgusting ways. There's no mincing any words here. This fic is incredibly terrible.
Bring your Bleepka, dear reader. You're going to need it.
Fic's Rating: G for Godawful MA
MST's Rating: MA (James and Tomoko have their moments of language. However, Jessie brings her rage to nuclear levels here.)
*This fic is the sequel to "Crescent Variation". If you want to refresh your memory, read it here.*
*This fic uses the original Japanese names... except for Usagi and Chibiusa. The riffers themselves will stick to consistency and use the original Japanese names for everyone.*
*The opening disclaimer that occurs in Chapters 2 through 4 are gone. The stage scenes that occur after the end of each chapter are gone in Chapters 3 and 4, since it would be redundant to riff on them over and over again.*
*This fic is firmly in the "Catastrophic Failure" category. Seriously, he should never write anything again.*
*This fic contains a sex scene. It also includes misogyny and massive doses of gore and homophobia.*
Parts: One  Two  Three

M81/C07 - Swimming Through Apologies (Original Erotica by Anthony Beal)
Two people with no names end up on a train together... and their escapade is littered with tons of purple prose. Watch the Neo Esaka members translate this odd adventure.
Fic's Rating: MA
MST's Rating: T
*This fic gets its own tag of "What?" The purple prose cemented it.*
*It is an erotica, so a sex scene is obvious here. It's... also oddly written.*
Read it here!

M82/D07 - Master Of The Heart (Pokemon anime fic by "Pokésue". Again, not the Suethor's real pen name.)
Meet Haine. She has no personality whatsoever. She's also the best that no one ever was... and it's incredibly dull. She also loves Ash... and that "relationship" is also horrifically dull. It doesn't help that she insults him at times, either. Enjoy this dull fic with the Crazy Train members.
Fic's Rating: K
MST's Rating: T
Parts: One  Two  Three

M83/E04 - Roguishly Possessed (Sonic fic by bloomacncheez)
The beginning may have repeated in the previous fic, but the sequel is no repeat. Windy washes up on the beach, and Jet's smitten with her. Unfortunately, Wave is not amused by this at all. Under the bad humor, there is a bit of a story here. The Riffer Recruits are set to tackle this fic.
Fic's Rating: T
MST's Rating: T
*This fic is the sequel to "Wish Upon a Starr". Catch up on it by reading the riffing here.*
Parts: One  Two  Three

M84/412 - Sailor Moon and the New Scouts (Sailor Moon fic by Taracova Universa)
The Riffer Gauntlet begins. In the first of five (yes, five!) fics, we're introduced to a bunch of Senshi that are... once again, better than Sailor Moon. And of course, the plot makes no sense whatsoever. Everyone's dumber than a bag of hammers, and the main Mary Sue is incredibly arrogant and unlikable, so it's definitely going to be one heck of a ride. Sonic, the Kyos, and Mai are ready to begin.
Don't feel bad if you get lost along the way. The plot for this and the four fics after this one are truly that wonky.
Fic's Rating: K (probably should be K+ or T)
MST's Rating: T
*Both Kyos are present, so you know the drill. Kyo L. for the Black Crow's grouchy fox, and Kyo K. for the Neo Esaka's snarky leader.*
*This fic follows the original English dub for the most part. Oddly, Ami and Rei keep their names, and the Wicked Lady goes by Amara (Haruka's dub name).*
Parts: One  Two  Three  Four  Five

M85/413 - Sailor Moon Protecting the Future (Sailor Moon fic by Taracova Universa)
The Riffer Gauntlet continues. The second fic picks up where the first one left off, and it gets even messier. We find out that the Forbidden Sailor Trio are replacements (the fic claims that they're "upgrades") of three of the five Inner Senshi, and they're here to stop a wedding... so the main Mary Sue can fulfill her "destiny". And by "destiny", we mean "only she gets to ruin the story because she's a Mary Sue".
It sounds simple on paper, but it gets much worse. For example, there's a magical pregnancy transfer. This is not a joke, dear reader. This is actually a thing. We also find out that the main Sue, Universe, is actually the replacement of Sailor Moon. And her daughter? Yep, she's Chibi Moon's replacement. It gets dumber from there. How dumb?
Find out and lose your mind with Sonia, Miyu, Benimaru, and Axl.
Fic's Rating: K (should be T)
MST's Rating: T
*This fic is the sequel to "Sailor Moon and the New Scouts".*
*Yes, the fic still uses the English dub, but the names are now mangled. Raye is "Ray", Lita is "Leta", Mina is "Nina", and Rini is "Renee". The riffers will just use the original dub names to save face.*
Parts: One  Two  Three

M86/414 - Sailor Moon and the Golden Key (Sailor Moon fic by Taracova Universa)
Did you have a difficult time keeping track of the bland characters from the first two fics? Too bad, you're getting more! And they're ripoffs of other canon characters, too! This fic gets even worse with the plot, and it's getting to the breaking point. It's so bad that not even the Suethors know what's going on anymore. Not only that, they also mess up their own canon by getting names mixed up or misspelled. Peachy.
Watch Manic, Jessie, Emi, and James crack under the pressure.
Fic's Rating: T
MST's Rating: M (thanks to Jessie and James being rather colorful in their language again)
*This fic is the sequel to "Sailor Moon Protecting the Future".*
*Yes, the fic still uses the English dub, but some names are now mangled. Raye is "Ray", Lita is "Leta", Mina is "Nina", and Rini is "Renee". The riffers will just use the original dub names to save face.*
*This fic has a ton of hand holding that insults the riffers. Also, Sailor Universe's nasty Sue attitude gets even worse here. Therefore, it's another "Epic Failure" fic.*
*This fic contains a character death.*
Parts: One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven

M87/415 - Sailor Moon and the Immortal Ring (Sailor Moon fic by Taracova Universa)
It's a Sailor Moon fic... in name only. Yes, the Mary Sues have hogged the spotlight to the point where they have literally pushed the title character and her friends out of the way. They only appear in one measly part out of four. That's it.
As if that wasn't alienating enough, the "plot" revolves around an evil queen who should've been deposed four fics ago, but the "protagonists" are finally caring about it because... reasons. Also, there are plot twists that aren't really plot twists, and preventable casualties are blatantly ignored. If you thought that these "protagonists" were already dumb, then you haven't seen anything yet, reader.
Amy, Cassy, Keiko, and Rory are ready to deal with this fic.
Fic's Rating: T
MST's Rating: T
*This fic is the sequel to "Sailor Moon and the Golden Key".
*This fic has been modified for this riffing. It's to remove the fancy text in the letters that have been sent and exchanged.*
*This fic's full of more hand holding, bad plot elements, and blatant idiocy that angers the riffers. Once again, it's another "Epic Failure" fic.*
*This fic has a handful of character deaths. Proceed with caution here.*
Parts: One  Two  Three  Four

M88/504 - Sailor Moon: A Culture Reborn (Sailor Moon fic by Taracova Universa)
The death of one of her closest friends stuns Queen Rosalina. Naturally, she does what every Mary Sue does to process their grief... and that's to be an irrational jerk to just about everybody and not get called out for it! Yes, she and Caranovia are now holding the Jerk Sue ball that Taracova used to hold, and they both become insufferable dolts along the way.
It's another Sailor Moon fic in name only. Also, the summary for this fic claims that "neat things" happen in this fic.
They're not "neat". At all.
The Riffer Recruits are ready to finish the Riffer Gauntlet.
Fic's Rating: T
MST's Rating: T
*This fic is the sequel to "Sailor Moon and the Immortal Ring".*
*Thanks to Rosalina's nasty Sue attitude, this fic earns yet another "Epic Failure" title.*
*There is a minor character death.* (However, it doesn't stick.)
Parts: One  Two  Three  Four

M89/D08 - legolas (Lord of the Rings fic by "laura")
Yes, it's the infamous "legolas by laura" that's been riffed to hell and back. It doesn't really need an introduction or anything like that, so just watch the Crazy Train riff it.
Fic's Rating: T
MST's Rating: T
*Rape is mentioned here, but it's not in explicit detail.*
Read it here!

M90/C08 - First Time/In the heat of Night (Dead or Alive fics by Alex118)
Helena is horny, so she requires her one and only "twu luv" to bonk her. I just described the plot of both fics. I'm not kidding. The Neo Esaka will be riffing this.
Fic's Rating: MA
MST's Rating: T
*"In the heat of Night" is the sequel to "First Time".*
*These fics are connected to "The Power of Love". If you want to catch up, either scroll to the top of the page or click here to read it. It's not needed, but a bit recommended since Emi mentions some parts of the story.*
*These fics have sex scenes.*
Read it here!

M91/A17 - The Ultimate Pokemon Master (Pokémon Anime parody fic by Suiceene)
He doesn't have a name, but he's manly, loved by everyone who doesn't have two working brain cells, and he's... annoying as all heck. Oh, dear heavens. Come join the Egg Spiral as they hate this nameless Gary Stu who pretty much hits every bad character checklist with an iron bat. The odd thing is that not even they could tell if this fic was a parody or not for a while. They've riffed too many bad fics.
Fic's Rating: T
MST's Rating: T/M
*In any other situation, this would have been an "Epic Failure" fic. However, a certain line at the end of Part Two pretty much reveals itself to be a parody.*
Parts: One  Two

M92/B17 - Sabrina's Adventure 2 1/2: The Next Generation (Sonic *dead*fic by Sabrina the Guardian/sonicgirl)
Well... this fic takes place immediately after the last chapter in the last fic. And it's full of more snow and fluff. That's it. You're literally not going to miss anything if you skip this fic. If you feel like it, just read along with the Black Crow.
Fic's Rating: T
MST's Rating: T
*This is an unfinished interquel fic. If you want to get familiar with the entire background of this fic series so far, jump back to "Sabrina's Adventure" here. The sequel, "Sabrina's Adventure 2: Return of Sabrina" is here.*
Read it here!

M93/S08 - Miles "Tails" Prower (Sonic fic by InfiniteAnime)
One day, Tails finds two incredibly edgy anime swords in a bid to prove that he's never to be underestimated ever again. After that, he proceeds to go completely out of character and beat the living tar out of practically the entire cast of the Sonic video games with terribly written and incredibly repetitive fight scenes set to music from Sonic... and the "Kingdom Hearts" series for some reason. Get ready to be slashed and comboed to intense boredom with the Egg Spiral members and the Riffer Recruits.
Fic's Rating: G for Godawful T (with some language near the end of the fic)
MST's Rating: T (for language with Tomoko [and Kyo L.] as the worst offenders here)
*Of course, since a certain website doesn't allow quotations in their titles, the fic looks like "Miles Tails Prower" instead.*
*Since this is a fic that painted beating up a six year old as a good thing and angers almost everyone in different ways, this fic is a "Colossal Failure".*
*Part Eleven contains some mild violence. Part Twelve contains a death scene, though they're not in explicit detail.*
Parts: One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven  Eight  Nine  Ten  Eleven  Twelve

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Here are the Obscure References for the Egg Spiral, Black Crow, Neo Esaka, Crazy Train, and the Riffer Recruits.
The Obscure References for the Riffer Collabs are here.
The Obscure References for the Special is here.
And here are this season's Behind The Scenes.

"Character development? Who the hell needs that useless crap?" - Kyo L., "All My Heart"
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