Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Special Episode 8: Miles "Tails" Prower (Part Six)

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Note: Sorry for no update yesterday. Was busy with Christmas stuff.

Sonic: Eh, that happens. No big deal.

Anyway... should be interesting... I hope...

Amy: No, it won't. It's never going to be interesting. I don't care.

Chapter 15: Escape from G.U.N. Headquarters!!

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Tails didn't have time to worry about where the G.U.N. general went, he really didn't care either.

Tomoko: Yeah, why should you care when you pressed your damn game breaker weapons right on his throat?
Miyuki: *mutters under her breath* Asshole.
Tomoko: Not-Prower's working on your last nerve, Fujiwara.

Tails headed straight, in hopes of finding and reaching the exit, so he could escape the G.U.N. headquarters.

Que: "Dance to the Death" (Kingdom Hearts 2)

Sonia: Great, more of the same music. I think this jukebox is broken.
Akiko: Ya think?

Tails dashed forward and used his tails to propel himself even further. Tails no longer had to deal with G.U.N. soldiers, the only enemies Tails ran into was G.U.N. robot mechs, and the big walking mechs. But, mostly, Tails ran into the walking mechs more. He took out the enemies the same ways he did before,

Sonic: ...by using CTRL+C and CTRL+V.

he zigzagged along to dodge the walking mechs' bullets and dashed toward them. When he reached the mechs, he sliced it in half, vertically, north to south with his right, or left, weapon.

Amy: You don't even know what hand he used?! You wrote this thing!
Tomoko: This is the second time I've seen that such to such and vertically or horizontally crap. Should I start drinking to that?
Tails: No, I don't think that will be showing up much.
Sonia: He went horizontally, left to right. Now he went vertically, north to south. See the blandness here?
Miyuki: Fic's full of 'em. You didn't even have to point that stuff out.

He also moved along side to side to dodge the robot mechs' bullets, and just sliced them up into all kinds of pieces with duel aerial slashing combos.

Everyone except Tomoko: *sighs* Double drink.
Tomoko: Thirty-eight. *takes two shots* Seriously, my liver's gonna die on me if this keeps up.

It took awhile, but eventually, Tails reached the exit. So, he quickly got out of the G.U.N. headquarters.

Manic: *bored* Hooray.

End Music

Tails found himself on a strange clear, but neon, platform. It was purple, on its edges,

Sonic: I think we've scraped against enough of this fic's edges.
Amy: We're probably full of stab wounds now.

though, so Tails could tell where the ends of the platform were. The platform was circular.

Sonia: Then it doesn't have "edges" if it's circular. Do you even know what a circle is?
Sonic: But a platform has an edge, of course.
Sonia: Of course, of course.

Tails went near one of the edges and looked down. Maybe he shouldn't have, because Tails couldn't even see the ground!! This... wasn't good. Obviously, it was a LONG fall.

Miyuki: *kicks "Tails" over the platform*
Tails: Are the tails still taped together?
Miyuki: You know it.
Tails: I know that I normally don't say anything like this, but... good. Thank you.

Tails heard something behind him. He turned around quickly. He went wide-eyed, and was speechless; Tails also gulped.

Tomoko: Oh, now the little brat is finally scared.
Akiko: Hey, he finally got back into character for two whole seconds!

It was a black, red, and white hedgehog. It was Shadow!!

Manic: *flatly* Shocker.

Shadow had the red chaos emerald in his right hand. Shadow looked at it, and noticed it was glowing. Shadow then glanced at Tails.

"Figures..." thought Tails

Sonia: Yeah, how dare Shadow have a Chaos Emerald that he needs to perform Chaos Control. Entitled little brat.

"What are you doing with a chaos emerald, Tails?" asked Shadow, he continued "You should know by now that only me, Sonic, or Knuckles should be the ones holding them." informed Shadow.

Amy: *angry* Shadow would never say anything like that, you hack!
Sonic: *weary* I'm so tired of this fic throwing everyone out of character like this.

Tails dropped his backpack and put it aside, so it wouldn't get in the way. Shadow looked at the backpack, then looked back at Tails.

"Now that I've said that, be a good boy and hand over the chaos emerald" demanded Shadow.

Sonia: Again... he'd never say this. This is so out of character that it hurts.

"No" answered Tails

"You're joking, right? Don't fool yourself, Tails, just hand it over, and no one gets hurt" warned Shadow

All of a sudden, Omega showed back up, but, Tails could tell Omega was still hurt from the Overture's attack.

"Shadow, I don't see the problem in just letting Tails keep the chaos emeralds.

Manic: I do!
Miyuki: We all do. He might as well go Super on everyone right now.
Akiko: With four of those things? I thought you needed seven.
Manic: Yeah, I think Kyo told you about a fic where there was this Gary Stu that could use Chaos Control without a Chaos Emerald.
Akiko: Oh, yeah. Dusk.
Sonic, Sonia, Amy: *sighs heavily*
Manic: We don't miss him.

I can understand that you want them since they seem to only re-activate when something bad is going to happen, but, Tails has changed. I can tell. There's something different about him, and--" informed Omega

But, Shadow clocked Omega in his face with his right fist, punching Omega so hard, Omega flew threw another wall in the G.U.N. headquarters, before Omega could finish what he was trying to tell Shadow.

"This is none of your business, Omega!!" shouted Shadow.

All: *speechless*
Amy: Shadow would never treat Omega like that! *stamps her paper* I mean, it's technically obsolete since Manic went and left for a part, but still... this is a massive failure of a fic. *rubs her forehead* I want a backup.
Tails: *looks at his Miles Electric* Mai will fill in for you. I mean, she won't be happy, but she'll fill in.
Akiko: I think this is Shadow trying to knock the OOC out of Omega.
Sonia: In a properly written fic, that would be accurate. However, that doesn't work when he's also OOC.

Tails had enough, he got his weapons out and got in his fighting stance. Shadow saw this.

"What, that's all? New weapons? Tch, so what?" asked Shadow, Tails stayed silent, so Shadow continued "Do you honestly believe you can defeat me?" asked Shadow.

Tails still stayed silent.

Sonia: *sarcastically* What riveting writing.

"Answer me!!" demanded Shadow.

"I don't know..." started Tails, he paused, then continued "But... I won't go down without a fight!!!"

Tomoko: Great, more slashing crap.

Shadow is supposedly the "Ultimate Life Form". Can Tails defeat him then? Only time will tell...

Amy: Yes. Yes, he will. Stop trying to add suspense. We don't care.
Akiko: Seriously, what's the point of this stuff if he's always gonna win? There's no effort. This stuff is so boring! How is this guy writing the same stuff for so many chapters?
Amy: Beats me.

To be continued...

P.S.: sigh Shadow's still an ass... ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Miyuki: P.S.: I hate these dumb notes.
Tails: Could be worse. They could be in the middle of the chapter.

Note: Oh... this should be good...

Tails: Again... it won't.

Chapter 16: Surprising Shadow!!

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Tails really wasn't sure if he could defeat Shadow.

All: *stares at the screen*
Sonic: *baffled* You're kidding me, right?
Amy: And here comes another one-sided fight.
Miyuki: Fic sure knows how to create the most useless suspense.

But, of course, Shadow seemed confident as he had a smug smirk on his face. But then, the voice contacted Tails again. It's been awhile since the voice talked to Tails before a fight.

"You've done well so far without my help" remarked the voice

Akiko: Are you sure? I mean, you're the sword... er, swords. Whatever.

"Thanks. It's really all thanks to you, and the weapons' power. Thanks to you, my confidence about my own strength had grown significantly" informed Tails

Sonia: Same with his rudeness.
Tomoko: And his dumb Stu abilities.
Sonia: Which caused the quality of this fic to decline significantly.
Tomoko: There's no quality in this crap, Hedgehog.

"Hmph. I see..." started the voice "Now, as far as this "Shadow", I can understand why you'd be afraid of him." remarked the voice.

Tails was shocked, he couldn't believe the voice knew Tails was afraid of Shadow, but then again, the voice was inside him.

Tails: "I" really did lose some IQ points, huh?
Manic: Your bad clone's lost a butt ton of 'em, man.

"But..." the voice continued "It's done. The power is now throughout your entire body,

Amy: And we weren't shown a single frigging thing.
Tails: New powers as the plot demands.
Akiko: Lame... just so lame.

all you have to do now, is use it, Tails. Use the weapons' power to get rid of your underestimation, period." suggested the voice

"Right!!!" answered Tails. This... should be interesting...

Que: "I Am (All Of Me)" (Shadow the Hedgehog)

Sonic: What? No music from "Kingdom Hearts" this time?
Amy: Enjoy it.

Shadow started rushing Tails at a simple running speed. Tails didn't like it.

Tails: I don't like you, you... meanie poopy head.
Sonic: *snickers*

"Fool. Don't go easy on me." suggested Tails

Tails disappeared into thin air.

Everyone except Tomoko: *flatly* What.
Tomoko: Another random power, huh? Just gained it out of nowhere, too. Man, screw this crap.

"What?! Impossible... Tails could never move that fast. That's Sonic's and mine light speed fast.

Amy: How do I sentence good?

When did Tails... how did Tails...?!" wondered Shadow.

Sonia: Another out of character moment. Shadow does not panic when he fights.
Manic: Yo, if the Shadow fans come for this fic, I'm not stopping them.
Sonia: Manic, everyone is coming for this. This includes the Tails fans.
Akiko: And Tails himself.
Tails: Yep.

He had no time to wonder.

Miyuki: Even though he already did. The narration just said that he was wondering! I think this fic's insulting my intelligence, and I'm not liking it.

Tails reappeared behind Shadow and intensely slashed Shadow with intense duel ground slashing combos,

Tomoko: Yeah, yeah, double drink. *takes two shots* Forty. *rubs her forehead* I think it's gonna hit again.
Akiko: Uh-oh.

which Tails ended with a clockwise spin and striking Shadow's back with his right weapon, which forced Shadow forward a couple of feet.

Manic: Uh... wouldn't that technically cause Shadow to move away from Stu Tails? I mean, he struck his back.
Miyuki: Quit using logic.

Shadow quickly turned around and tried to rush Tails and punch him with his left hand, but Tails just easily sidestepped the punch and intensely slashed Shadow again with intense duel ground slashing combos.

Tomoko: *heavily sighs, takes two more shots* Forty... two... fuck this fic. I'm giving it forty-two middle fingers up.

Shadow couldn't believe it, he was speechless, Tails was surprising Shadow!! Tails ended the combos the same way as before,

Sonic: ...with a forty-third shot that Tomoko has to take.
Tomoko: Damn it. *takes a shot*

except he hit Shadow's left side in his kidney area, and he was forced sideways a couple of feet.

Shadow jumped into the air.

Tails: *while browsing on his Miles Electric* Riveting.

"Okay, dodge this!! Chaos spear!!" shouted Shadow

Shadow threw yellow, dagger-like, energy spears at Tails, but, Tails did just easily dodge them and flew into the air after Shadow.

Amy: He dodged them...
Sonic, Sonia, Manic: ...with ease.

Shadow tried throwing more Chaos Spears at Tails, but Tails just easily slashed them aside with his weapons. Shadow was even more shocked.

"Unbelievable!! Tails just easily slashed aside my chaos spears like they were nothing!! Where did Tails get all this strength?!" wondered Shadow

Tomoko: You're not looking at those big ass game breaker swords there?

Tails reached Shadow and intensely slashed him again with intense duel aerial slashing combos.

All: *annoyed* Oh, come on!
Tomoko: *takes two shots* Forty... five... ugh, you know what? Lemme just say it right now.
Akiko: No!
Tomoko: No, I'm gonna say it, damn it! This hack ass writer couldn't write his goddamn way out of a fuckin' wet paper bag! That damn "Twilight" writer writes better scenes than this!
Sonia: That's the softest thing you've ever said.
Tomoko: I can say more, Hedgehog. Wanna hear it?
Sonia: No, thank you. That's fine.

This time, Tails ended it with his aerial X cross slash that was sending Shadow off the platform!!

Manic: *flatly* Whee.

"No way!! Have to hurry, but, I'll attack Tails at the same time!!" thought Shadow

Amy: And how long until Tails the Stu intervenes in that?
Miyuki: Give it a sec.

Shadow started spinning around clockwise really fast, like Sonic.

Sonic: *sarcastically claps* Quality.

He was able to save himself from falling off the platform and he also tried to hit Tails. Tails dodged it easily at first, but Shadow chased Tails with his spin relentlessly. Tails still dodged it, but they were pretty close calls.

Akiko: *rolls her eyes* Of course they were. This boring Stu hasn't been hit once. That's not a struggle! This is lame!

"I have to stop Shadow... but how?!" wondered Tails, then... "Wait...

Tails: *as himself* I'm a Gary Stu! I can do anything!

maybe I can stop him. Oh well, better than getting attacked relentlessly." realized Tails

Tails: None of the blows hit you at all, you bad clone. This is not a dilemma.
Miyuki: Fic wants to make it one, so we're getting one.

When Shadow came spinning toward him, Tails waited a bit, and when Shadow was only a few feet in front of him, Tails threw his weapons out in front of him in an X shape, in hopes of stopping him.

Akiko: *writes* And then Shadow beat the crap out of Tails with "duel kicking combos". The ensuing beatdown caused Tails to regain his senses. *stops writing* Hey, it's like the stuff we do at home.
Tomoko: You know it, Miyadama.

Tails tried his best to stop Shadow, and at first, Tails couldn't because he was being forced backwards by Shadow, but eventually, Tails stood his ground and held Shadow back!! Tails just smirked.

Sonia: I'm gonna wipe that smirk off your smug face.
Manic: Sis, if you do that, he'll be a bloody streak on the ground.
Sonia: That's the point.

Tails cross-slashed Shadow, while he was still spinning, in an X cross slash!!

Sonic: I'm spinning the heck outta here.

Tails was able to send Shadow backwards, into the air, diagonally. Tails followed Shadow into the air and flew above him and aerial X cross-slashed him,

Sonia: Never mind, I'm drinking to that X cross slash stuff. *takes five shots of whiskey, coughs* Smooth.
Tails: I don't think you're supposed to swallow that stuff in rage.
Sonia: It worked before.

forcing Shadow to the ground, and he was still spinning!!

Akiko: Uh... who is spinning?
Amy: At this rate... who cares?

His spins were used against him, and him hitting the ground did more than double damage because of his spinning. Shadow finally stopped spinning and was flat on the ground, hurt.

Akiko: Oh. It was Shadow.
Amy: Still don't care. These fight scenes are so awful.
Akiko: Obviously. Can't find a fic with any good action now. Lame.

Tails stopped flying, put his right leg behind him, and let himself fall on Shadow's stomach, crushing his stomach with his left foot.

Sonic: Our protagonist, folks.
Tomoko: Y'know... if your "protagonist" has to be a little shit to everyone and get away with it, that ain't a fic. That's just a bad writer jerkin' off on the keyboard.
Tails: Uh... um... I shouldn't ask about that sentence.
Sonic: Great idea, buddy.

Tails jumped off of Shadow and kicked him off the platform with his right foot. Shadow fell off the platform, and let go of his red chaos emerald as well. That was it, Tails actually beat Shadow!!

Miyuki: *flatly* Hooray... I hate this fic.

End Music

"He'll be fine, he is Shadow afterall. Anyway, that's five down, two to go. Now... how to get out of here...?" wondered Tails

Tails finally was done with the G.U.N. headquarters. Now, Tails just had to get out. Would he?

Sonia: Yes, he will. Stop trying to add suspense. You're not good at it, Stuthor.
Tails: How many times do we need to repeat that line?
Manic: A lot.

To be continued...

P.S.: No, Tails didn't kill Shadow, but, he still deserved that IMO... ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Amy: Oh, fu-- I hate all of this! *proceeds to smash the screen with her hammer* Die, die, die!
Akiko: Oh, boy.
Miyuki: Do we get Mai now?
Sonic: Uh... in the next part.

Note: I'm trying my best, okay? I just thought you reviewers should know that. This has nothing to do with this week's chapter, I just felt I needed to tell you people that.

Sonic: Uh-oh, someone doesn't like criticism.
Tomoko: Too bad. Get better or get out. This ain't a coddle fest.

Chapter 17: Finally Back Home!

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Tails took out another miniature device out of his backpack and put in where he was located and pressed a red button.

Amy: And that wasn't confiscated?
Tails: Nor was it mentioned before. Look, I know that I have a bunch of gadgets, but that should've been mentioned somewhere down the line.

After about ten to fifteen minutes, he plane, the Tornado, showed up. Apparently this device was a remote control where Tails just had to put in his location, or wherever he was at, and presses the button, and the Tornado was put on auto-pilot and it flies to wherever Tails was at. It was very convenient if Tails went somewhere far away without his plane. It just proved even further that Tails was very intelligent.

Miyuki: *annoyed* Okay, number one, stop holding our hands. Number two, stop with the character shilling.
Manic: It's bad enough if the freakin' narrator has to start shilling.
Akiko: This fic's getting worse. Why is it getting worse? I don't understand! Quality isn't supposed to drop like that over time!
Sonia: Then this proves something. The Stuthor doesn't care about this fic. Who needs to put in the effort when people hate the repetitive fight scenes and the bad characterization of our "protagonist"?

Tails got into the Tornado and took off. After awhile though, Tails noticed quite a bit of airplanes around him. Since he really wasn't out of the G.U.N. Headquarters yet, Tails knew what those airplanes were without having to look at them. They were G.U.N. fighter airplanes. Tails wasn't out of trouble yet...

Sonic: And then they shot him down. The End.
Amy: Please, that's not happening.

Que: "Rowdy Rumble" (Kingdom Hearts 2)

Sonia: More of this? Yay.
Tails: I would say that this ruins the flow, but... there's no flow. Also, if these planes aren't remote controlled... that would make "me" a murderer.
Miyuki: And a wanted criminal.
Tails: You mean that "I'm" not one already? I escaped from G.U.N.
Miyuki: Ah, don't worry. Amnesia's probably gonna set in.

Tails just smirked.

Manic: Time to draw straws. Who's smacking him up first? Red tip wins.
Amy: *grabs all of the straws* Forget it, let's just jump him at once.
Tomoko: I hate crap like that, Rose. But for Not-Prower over there... I can break that rule just once.

Tails used homing missiles that homed in on aircraft far away, to destroy the G.U.N. airplanes that were far away from him, but could still cause damage to his Tornado.

Miyuki: Don't worry if the airplane's remains kill some civilians. That's just collateral damage.
Akiko: Ugh, no.

When G.U.N. airplanes were to close to him or were trying to attack him by grouping together and rushing him, Tails used two other kinds of weapons. One was just a simple missile that shot in a straight line, and the other weapon was a chain gun that was on the bottom of the Tornado.

Miyuki: Can we do eight different kinds of not caring?
Tomoko: Yeah. At least my liver can rest for once.

Tails had to go through this whole sky having to fight G.U.N. airplanes, just in different numbers and in different flocks, but Tails just destroyed them in the same ways, it just depended on how the airplanes were shooting him or coming at him.

Manic: This is the most creative writing ever. Who needs detail? That's for nerds.

But, eventually, Tails made it through and escaped the barrage of G.U.N. airplanes.

Sonia: Of course he did. If anyone thought he'd be in mortal peril, then they haven't been reading this fic.

End Music

After all that, Tails finally made his way back home, put the Tornado back into the plane garage, and took a well deserved rest after all that G.U.N. craziness.

Amy: Die of night terrors.
Akiko: Whoa. Dark.

But, little did Tails know, that Eggman was planning another devious plan to obtain Tails' chaos emeralds and his weapons...

Manic: And he'll fail again, and there'll be more "duel slashing combos" and... blah, blah, blah.

To be continued...

P.S.: Dogfights, huh? Sorry... kinda not good at those... '

Sonia: Oh, don't get us started on what this fic's doing wrong. Amy, take a break.
Amy: What? Seriously?
Sonic: Yeah. You... kinda broke the screen.
Tails: It's not a screen. It's a shell of its former self. We've been through this before.
Sonic: Well, yeah... I'm just saying.

--

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