Sissy Rambles About AEW Matches in 2022 (Part 7: September)

Sissy Analyzes Random Things: Sissy Rambles About AEW Matches in 2022 (Part 7: September)

Dear me, it's All Out season. Well, what'd you miss?

January and Feburary? Right here.
March? Go here.
April? It's over here.
May? Enjoy it here.
June? It's here.
July and August? Here.

----

September

Match of the Month

Men: September 4 (All Out) and September 21 (Dynamite Grand Slam) - Swerve in Our Glory vs. The Acclaimed (Parts I and II)

Give these men their goddamn accolades.

That was one of the best tag matches in the company. Bar none.

...also, seriously, Max Caster fucking lifted Keith Lee with one arm. I am floored.

I swear, you have this, and that tag match from Revolution 2020, that tag match from last year's All Out... must be something magical about tag matches in Chicago.

Personally, Part I was better, honestly. Part II shows how you can build stars from the ground up.

Women: September 30 (Rampage) - Willow Nightingale vs. Jamie Hayter

Only one downside: The easily distracted ref situation struck again.

The upsides are this: Willow is popular. Jamie is also popular.

Push these two to the damn moon right the fuck now.

Honorable Mentions - Men

September 4 (All Out Zero Hour) - PAC vs. Kip Sabian (All-Atlantic Championship Match)

I think this is the first time that I typed Kip's name this year. Holy crap.

Felt like I got a whiff of AEW's early days with that match. I do miss those days. They weren't perfect, but they did their damndest to give you some bangers.

This is gonna be an underrated match.

September 4 (All Out Zero Hour) - Eddie Kingston vs. Tomohiro Ishii (Part II)

You're going to put Eddie Kingston in the ring with a vet from New Japan?

You know that magic is gonna happen with this.

September 4 (All Out) - The Elite vs. "Hangman" Adam Page and Dark Order (Trios Championship Final)

It was not only a match to decide the inaugural champions. It was also a match to decide if Kenny or Hangman would be AEW's first Triple Crown holder.

Quite possibly... the second best match of the night, to be honest. However, unlike the tag match that came later, this was a match that had a lot of story references, so you pretty much had to have had a general story knowledge of the Elite in AEW up to that point. I wish that was explored further like in the older days of the company, where they'd put the emphasis on the story. Everything feels rushed here nowadays, sadly.

But what can I say? They're all damn good storytellers. It's why I started loving the cowboy.

And once again, that curse of "Hangman did well, but someone else did better" is still happening with him. This match is still worth watching, though. Too bad that his winning record at All Out remains at fucking zero. Which is ironic... because he won his match at All In!

(Also, for that Buckshot from Nick? 9/10! Master the "Lariat" part, and you're good to go!)

September 7 (Dynamite) - Death Triangle vs. Orange Cassidy and Best Friends (Trios Championship Match)

Aww, and poor Vacant's first reign didn't last long in AEW! Give Vacant a proper storyline!

Just kidding, of course. Anyway...

2PAC. You knew it was coming.

Yep, this win makes PAC the first wrestler in AEW to hold two different belts at the same time (as opposed to Sammy Guevara holding two TNT title belts earlier this year). And that already puts him in contention to be a Triple Crown winner (right in the same league as Hangman and Scorpio Sky). Absolutely amazing.

September 7 (Dynamite) - "Hangman" Adam Page vs. Bryan Danielson (Part III. The year of Part III!) (AEW World Championship Eliminator Match)

I'm sorry, what?!

Well, amazing that cutting out the cancer gets the cowboy back on Dynamite. I fucking wonder why.

Third verse, definitely not the same as the first two... especially since this match was bloodless! Record between these amazing fighters is now 1-1-1. Absolutely incredible. I'm not upset about Hangman's loss, because he looked very strong in defeat here. Honestly, I'm just happy to see my boy in a match on Dynamite again, so I didn't give a damn if he won or lost.

He'll get back on track. Just give him the proper story and setup, and we'll get the belt back on him, because I'll be honest... it's not Hangman's time yet. It actually needs to be Mox's time again, because his second reign got shafted. Even if the winner of this whole tourney isn't Mox (because honestly, I'm picturing that Danielson wins whole thing), he should get his proper time.

(Also, I noticed hat the cowboy was getting booed throughout the match. He may have been the accidental catalyst of this, but at least he didn't act like a childish prick who went on a whiny tirade and threw hands backstage. Just saying.)

September 7 (Dynamite) - Wheeler Yuta vs. Daniel Garcia (ROH Pure Championship Match)
(They met before on July 23 during Death of Dishonor for this exact same title, so this could technically be a Part II of sorts.)

What'd I say on January 12? Oh, just this:

"However, Daniel Garcia is a super talented guy here. I can honestly see him with the TNT title in the future. If this pace keeps up, it'll definitely be around his waist. This is more of a "Watch This Space" kind of thing."

Okay, I was a little bit off. However, a title is a title, and it's around his waist!

Told ya to watch this space.

Spetember 9 (Rampage) - Claudio Castagnoli vs. Dax Harwood (ROH World Championship Match)

You want a Ring of Honor style match?

Here, have a Ring of Honor style match.

September 14 (Dynamite) - Swerve in Our Glory vs. Lucha Bros. (AEW World Tag Team Championship Match)

Penta did a Canadian Destroyer on Keith Lee.

Thank you, that's what you're gonna get from this good ass match. Felt like I was watching the older days of the company once again.

September 14 (Dynamite) - Bryan Danielson vs. Chris Jericho (Part II; AEW Tournament of Champions Semifinal)

Much better!

Good lord, their first match at All Out was incredibly disappointing, so I'm more than happy that this made up for that dud.

Kudos to the American Dragon trolling the hell out of everyone (yes, myself included) for that little foot storyline there.

September 20 (Dark) - JD Drake vs. Matt Sydal

You have an underrated hidden gem here.

September 21 (Dynamite Grand Slam) - PAC vs. Orange Cassidy (Part III; AEW All-Atlantic Championship Match)

Technically, they met up four times in the ring, but this is the third one-on-one match for them. The year of Part III continues!

I know what most people are asking. "Why did PAC do that? Isn't he a face?"

Um... not really. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing the dude on my screen, but he's not called "The Bastard" for nothing. He's not straight up malicious, but he's not friendly, either.

And Cassidy isn't dumb. He knows that he got cheated out of that belt. They'll meet up in the ring again, and it's going to be a glorious mess.

September 21 (Dynamite Grand Slam) - Jon Moxley vs. Bryan Danielson (Part II; Tournament of Champions Final - AEW World Championship Match)

Second verse, same as the first--

Wait, no blood? It's for the belt? Same guy still won?

Okay, almost the same as the first.

Honestly, I did expect Danielson to win the whole thing, but Moxley getting the belt back ultimately makes sense, especially when you factor in the winner of the Golden Ticket Battle Royale... and for my thoughts on that, just scroll down.

September 23 (Rampage Grand Slam) - Jungle Boy vs. Rey Fenix

Can I be honest? Aside from Christian returning to still be a prick to JB... this match technically didn't need to happen.

But I still love seeing Jungle Boy and Fenix on my TV.

September 23 (Rampage Grand Slam) - Ricky Starks vs. Powerhouse Hobbs (Unsanctioned Lights Out Match)

Well, damn. Might not have been as brutal as the previous Lights Out Matches but...

I'll admit that my eyes widened when Hobbs yanked one of the tunnel lights out.

September 27 (Dark) - Dante Martin vs. Anthony Henry

Another underrated gem. I'm seriously convinced that The Workhorsemen are just underrated in general. Part of me thinks that they'd be a good fit in the new Ring of Honor.

September 28 (Dynamite) - Jon Moxley vs. Juice Robinson (AEW World Championship Eliminator Match)

I bet that this match was probably used as an excuse to see some New Japan talent, not that I'm complaining. I mean... there was a whole PPV collab with them in June, so we don't really need any complaints about that.

September 28 (Dynamite) - Chris Jericho vs. Bandido (ROH World Championship Match)

I'm going to be blunt.

Sign.

Bandido.

Now.

...wait, you're telling me that he was offered a full time AEW contract after this match?

Good. Give that man the attention that he deserves.

September 30 (Rampage) - The Acclaimed vs. Private Party vs. The Butcher and The Blade (AEW World Tag Team Championship Match; Triple Threat Match)

No, really, looks like everyone truly loves The Acclaimed.

Hot damn. I honestly hope that they'll have a good run with the belts. To be fair, the tag team belts are nowhere near dead, it just needs the same love that was given to the AEW World Championship (you know, before Hangman lost the belt and it got hot potato'd to the man made of glass).

September 30 (Rampage) - John Silver vs. Rush

Man, I love me some Johnny Hungiee. It's just a bit unfortunate that the Dark Order members only serve to be fodder to whoever the cowboy's feuding with.

Honorable Mentions - Women

September 4 (All Out) - Jade Cargill vs. Athena (TBS Championship Match)

Well, damn. Thanks for the She-Hulk cosplay, Jade. Neat stuff there.

Only downside to this match was that it was a little short for what it was. Despite that minor nitpick there, this literally proved that Jade is still getting better.

September 7 (Dynamite) - Toni Storm vs. Penelope Ford (AEW Interim Women's World Championship Eliminator Match)

Yeah, I think it's time we talked about Penelope.

I know that she just got back from injury, so can we put her on TV more often? She's already growing on me as a severely underrated member of the women's roster.

Spetember 12 (Dark Elevation) - Athena vs. Emi Sakura

I have nothing against Athena, but I do have everything against Emi not being on Dynamite or Rampage. Just saying.

September 16 (Rampage) - Penelope Ford vs. Willow Nightingale

...okay, so Penelope's gonna be on TV more often. Thanks for granting my wish there.

And seriously... has Willow been signed yet?!

"Because I liked it, okay?" Mentions

September 2 (Rampage) - Orange Cassidy and Best Friends vs. "Hangman" Adam Page and Dark Order (Trios Semifinal Match)

It was only a matter of time before my first favorite and my current favorite stepped into the ring.

Honestly, it was a good lighthearted match. Not too bad to have a little fun before the big show, yeah?

September 2 (Rampage) - A talk with Athena and Jade

Jade's come a long way from her 2021 self. Not only has her ring work gotten better, her promo work has gotten better, too.

September 7 (Dynamite) - The Return of Maxwell Jacob Friedman

My Jerkass Favorite.

How I've missed you.

September 7 (Dynamite) - "This is time to be a legend."

I never hated Jon Moxley. I understood why he was a lot of people's favorites, and I didn't mind seeing him on my screen.

I respected him when he took the time out to attend rehab. It's great that he asked for help. We're all glad that he got the help that he needed.

I jokingly call his promos "poetry slams". I don't know what it is with his promos, but I've certainly enjoyed hearing them lately.

And now this promo... where he put over every single person competing in the tournament with him.

Jon Moxley did not come to AEW to make this about him.

This is why we enjoy AEW. It's not about one person. It's about the colorful cast of characters that make the show.

(Now give that man his vacation time once he finishes with this tournament. Wait, he won the belt? Well, damn. Give him the vacation time after he loses it or something. Dude deserves a freakin' break since he carried the company on his back through the summer.)

September 19 (Dark Elevation) - Jora Johl vs. Frankie Kazarian

Because I'll keep saying it: Frankie is still underrated in AEW. It sucks that his last major storyline involved getting wrapped up in the shittiest feud of 2022.

September 20 (Dark) - Madison Rayne vs. Viva Van

Hmm. I don't know why I kind of like seeing Viva Van at the moment. Perhaps she could be a fit for the new Ring of Honor?

September 26 (Dark Elevation Grand Slam) - Skye Blue and Captain Shawn Dean vs. Kip Sabian and Penelope Ford

Indeed, "Because I liked it".

Seriously, more Kip and Penelope, please.

September 27 (Dark) - Jora Johl vs. Blake Li

I don't know what it is about this match, but it looked like a pretty solid exhibition match. And now I feel like I might have to say this:

I feel like Jora Johl is also pretty underrated.

September 28 (Dynamite) - Bryan Danielson vs. "Daddy Magic" Matt Menard

...for one reason only: because of Claudio carrying Parker out of the match.

I am dumb.

September 28 (Dynamite) - Damn, Yuta!

I was a bit iffy on Yuta's mic skills last week (because really... you're given the mic against Maxwell Jacob Friedman, of all of the people in the world), so of course it was going to be a little intimidating.

This week, the worries went away. It was damn good stuff. I've never seen such rapid improvement on the mic in a measly ass week. Good shit, dude.

"Oh, god, oh, fuck!" Mentions

September 23 (Rampage Grand Slam) - The Golden Ticket Battle Royale... where the winner probably still won't matter because he'll get killed by Mox anygoddamn way.

And the winner is... Hangman?!

I should've realized that when his theme was the only one that was played at the beginning of this thing... and then he got jumped from behind.

Well, on one hand, I'm happy, because this will be the very first time that we'll get to see Mox (the guy that I respect) vs. Hangman (the guy that I adore) in a singles match. I just can't believe that this is finally happening. It's gonna be good like Mox vs. Brody, not gonna lie.

On the other hand, I'm fucking scared! The match is going to be in Cincinatti... and that's Mox's hometown! My boy's gonna die! Help!

(And yes, my friends did indeed make fun of me when my happiness turned into legit fear.)

Regardless, win or lose, I'll still believe in him, no matter what. This match was going to happen eventually. Also, it's for the belt, and we all know that the cowboy doesn't get a title match for no random reason. A story's finally waiting in the wings for him.

By the way, after Cincinatti... AEW will be in Norfolk, Virginia. That's in the cowboy's home state, by the way.

It's time for him to regain the time that he deserves. That doesn't mean that he should win the belt back (considering the real possible chance here), he just needs the story focus that was unjustly taken away from him.

And now, like everyone else, I also want to see the cowboy vs. the bull. Gimme that match. I want that match.

(For those who didn't know what Rush said to Hangman the previous week, it was translated as, "A cowboy could never beat a bull. I'm going to destroy you, dog!" Also... the wish has been granted. We're getting this match on October 5.)

Also, it's pretty funny that Mox and the so-called "empty-headed dumbfuck" are now getting a title match together after a certain someone screwed both of them out of their title reigns with his self-insert fanfiction, got himself suspended, and was forced to vacate the belt over petty bullshit. Oh, the sweet irony. And here's another ironic part; MJF currently has the chip from the Casino Ladder Match. When the Joker entered in last year's Casino Ladder Match, who was the first and last person that he battled for the same chip that the Salt of the Earth is currently holding?

And who was initially going to be the cowboy's first challenger when he won the title the first time around?

Exactly.

It's going to come full circle on October 18.

Let's ride.

(By the way, turns out that the cowboy's happiness has also turned into legit fear, as seen in this clip. No wonder he's seen as relatable to a lot of people.)

"We got a real problem here." Mentions

September 4 (All Out) and September 21 (Dynamite Grand Slam) - Lord, save us all from the Jericho Boring Invincible Villain Society...?

This is a special case now. There's a little problem within the faction... story-wise.

Now this is where the water is a little muddled. There's that small crack in the invincibility armor.

(And before anyone asks... no, I did not like Jericho vs. Danielson Part I. And no, I didn't like how Claudio barely held onto the ROH title for almost two months.)

September 14 (Dynamite) - Toni Storm and Athena vs. Serena Deeb and Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D.

The match itself was fine. Actually, the match itself was good! However, I have two problems here, and they're glaring.

Number one, Toni Storm got pinned. That's not a problem in any other situation, but she is the current champion. Well, interim champion, but still... she's holding the top prize for the women right now!

Number two... you know what I'm going to say about the doctor getting another title shot this soon. There's other women here. Fucking. Utilize. Them.

September 21 (Dynamite Grand Slam) - What was the fucking point?!

Good lord, someone help the women's division, because their stories are shit. This Britt/Jamie tension pretty much reminded me of the Scorpio/Ethan tension, where it looked like they were going to split, only to do the most weaksauce swerve ever.

This is some weakass weaksauce bullshit.

September 28 (Dynamite) - I'm about to give up.

You already know my gripes about the women's division. And you'll get to hear me gripe again.

Shouldn't the focus be on the person holding the belt? That would be Toni Storm right now.

Why is she taking a backseat to Britt and Saraya? Granted, the latter used her time to prop up the champ and she arrived last week, but still.

Why did Saraya even give out the stipulation to Toni's match?

Granted, the match itself was alright, considering that it was Toni vs. Serena... and I don't know why Serena got another title shot this soon, either... then again, rankings don't fucking exist now.

Just any time in general - The blind ref situation

Alright, I'll admit it. I'm sick and tired of heels being incredibly over reliant on having their friends/underlings distract the ref. This has become way too common, and it's caused me to stop caring about the match whenever this happens.

Even worse, it's actually prevented me from putting the match in any of my honorable mentions unless it's actually memorable (like Trent and Chuck's bad attempt at cheating, for example).

It's gotten to the point where I actually groaned when Tay and Anna came out to do the usual distraction bullshit during the Mox/Sammy match on September 14. I'm tired. Just eject the dumb distractions, refs. Please.

(It gets dumber because of course it does; Eddie gets his victory reversed in his match against Sammy on September 23 due to the head honcho wanting the refs to tighten up their match callings, and the story gets dropped like a sack of hot potatoes the very next week when a distraction causes Willow and Silver to lose their respective matches. Consistency doesn't exist, sadly.)

"This shit ain't good at all." Mentions

September 4 (All Out) - Oh, great. Now we gotta devalue the fucking AEW World Championship?!

Jesus, and I thought that the TNT belt turning into a cold fish was bad enough. (Speaking of that belt... when is that going to be defended on a PPV? Last person who got to do that was Miro... last year!)

And it looks like it's gotten devalued even further. See below.

September 4/5 (All Out Media Scrum) - What in the fuck was that?! (Or the "Gripebomb" that created "Brawl Out". No, I didn't create those terms, but I sure wish I did.)

Yeah, remember when I said this shit back in May?

"There's a pattern here. Maybe the problem isn't in Eddie Kingston, Maxwell Jacob Friedman, or "Hangman" Adam Page.

It might be in CM Punk."

We're gonna have to add Jon Moxley to that list, too. They all said it. We should've listened to all four of those men.

And this all started because of a line that Hangman said... that nobody really cared about... until it bubbled up months later. All because of a petty ass grudge from an offhand line.

You know that that shit was supposed to be storyline shit and not spilling into real life?

Enough said. If this doesn't get ironed out, then kick him to the curb. Immediately.

And no, I will not have to be forced to respect him because he wore two shirts that supported women's rights. I can respect the fact that he does support women's rights (and for context, he did verbally rip Chris Brown to shreds that one time, which was awesome). But I can also say that I was getting sick of "All Punk Wrestling". This will not make me put him on a pedestal. Stop being fucking brainless morons about this.

(Oh, it got announced on the 7th that the title was vacated along with the trios titles. Good. What a worthless second reign. I'm shocked that he literally dethroned himself in the shortest reign column there. And no, I'm not happy that The Elite were also dethroned, but they had to be for the sake of the investigation. Sucks, really.)

Another Battle of the Belts already? And we're cranking it into Full Gear? Oh, dear! On to October and November!
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