Sissy Rambles About AEW Matches in 2022 (Part 5: June)

Sissy Analyzes Random Things: Sissy Rambles About AEW Matches in 2022 (Part 5: June)

My, oh, my. Welcome to Part 5. What'd you miss?

January and Feburary? Right here.
March? Go here.
April? It's over here.
May? Enjoy it here.

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June

Because it's that damn memorable.

June 1 (Dynamite) - Maxwell Friedman's Tactical Nuke

Yep, it has to be here before we even get to the match of the month. There's no way that something this huge could just be lumped into "Because I liked it, okay?"

Well, he said that he wouldn't say this as MJF, but as "Max Friedman". And if you know his real name, only the middle name of his ring name is made up.

And I'll admit it... he's got a point. Now bring his ass back. Dynamite's not the same without this man.

Match of the Month

Men: June 26 (AEW x NJPW: Forbidden Door) - Will Ospreay vs. Orange Cassidy (IWGP United States Heavyweight Championship Match)

I knew it was going to be good.

I didn't expect it to be this fucking incredibly amazing.

This match is clearly head and shoulders above the rest for June. It might even make a strong case for the match of the year. We're only halfway done with 2022, and this... I don't know if anything could top this.

Women: June 26 (AEW x NJPW Forbidden Door) - Thunder Rosa vs. Toni Storm (AEW Women's World Championship Match)

A ThunderStorm, indeed. My only gripe with Rosa's reign is the exact same thing that happened to Hangman's reign; the build to the matches are downright disappointing, but the matches themselves are good. Again, that's not Rosa's fault, that's the booking's fault.

Britt's got stories. Jade's getting stories. It's time to give the Women's World Champion a story, too.

Honorable Mentions - Men

June 1 (Dynamite) - Jon Moxley vs. Daniel Garcia (Part II)

Second verse, same as the first. Kinda.

Someone's got a lot to learn when it comes to a very seasoned vet, however.

June 3 (Rampage) - Young Bucks vs. Lucha Brothers (Part... uh... I lost count. Part VI or somethin?)

Because it's Young Bucks vs. Lucha Brothers. Yeah, it's good, but honestly? It's still not topping the Steel Cage Match. Then again, that was on the highest bar possible.

June 8 (Dynamite) - Buddy Matthews vs. PAC (All-Atlantic Championship Qualifying Match)

You know... I wish that we all weren't being told at the last second that it was for a tournament arc. That's the only minor downside here.

The upside, however, is that this match came after the terrible clusterfuck that was the Casino Battle Royale, and it made the previously dead quiet crowd come alive. Give both of these men credit for that.

An even bigger upside? Seriously, I got more PAC on my TV. He better win this whole damn thing.

(Okay, if Miro wins, I wouldn't mind, either. One of them better get that belt. Still gonna root for PAC on this, though.)

June 8 (Dynamite) - Kyle O'Reilly vs. Jon Moxley (Winner goes on to the AEW Interim World Championship Match at Forbidden Door)

Look, by itself, the match was great. O'Reilly is actually very damn good in the ring.

Problem was that the end result was predictable as fuck. I'm saving that rant for later in this rambling.

June 10 (Rampage) - FTR and Trent Beretta vs. United Empire (Will Ospreay, Kyle Fletcher, and Mark Davis)

Six Star FTR don't miss! I can't believe that I'm enjoying those two more and more!

June 14 (Dark) - Ethan Page vs. Frankie Kazarian

Or should I say... "Underrated vs. Underrated"? Seriously, it's kind of weird that the Men of the Year aren't really in tag matches, and yet... Scorpio Sky's holding a singles belt.

June 15 (Dynamite - Road Rager) - Dax Harwood vs. Will Ospreay

Nothing against Cash, but I think it's time we talked about Dax being good as a singles and a tag guy. Personally, I like him as a tag guy.

June 15 (Dynamite - Road Rager) - Jurassic Express vs. Young Bucks (Part... uh... I think I lost count here, too. Part V or somethin'?) (AEW World Tag Team Championship Match; Ladder Match)
(It was originally going to be Jurassic Express vs. Young Bucks vs. The Hardys... but unfortunately, the younger Hardy brother was suspended for drunk driving on the weekend before this match.)

Or should we say... "Ladders and Tables"? Sure were a lot of tables in this ladder match.

Welp. They were my last two favorite guys holding belts. Five months isn't a bad run. Normally, I'd be mourning this as well... but I spent all that time gloating and teasing a friend who absolutely loathes the Young Bucks as payback for him making fun of me after Hangman lost the belt at Double or Nothing. I know, I'm a petty person.

However, there happened to be a masterclass in bad luck for Jungle Boy after this. After losing the tag titles, his own mentor turns on him and tells JB's mother and sister that "you raised a piece of shit".

That all happened on the day before his own birthday, no less. Yes, it was eventually revealed that Jungle Boy's birthday is actually on June 16. Ouch.

Also, I swear, Matt Jackson keeps losing a shoe whenever something big happens. Time to see if he loses his shoe when the Bucks have to defend against FTR...

June 17 (Rampage - Road Rager) - Jon Moxley vs. Dante Martin

Yeah, I came into this going, "Why bother, Mox ain't gonna lose, anyway."

Yeah, that happened.

Yeah, I still like Dante.

June 20 (Dark Elevation) - Frankie Kazarian vs. Andrade el Idolo

Or should I say... "Underrated vs. Underrated"... again?

Got some free time? Go ahead and watch this match when you get a chance.

June 22 (Dynamite) - Orange Cassidy and Roppongi Vice vs. United Empire

Honestly, this match felt like a bit of an appetizer for the PPV. And you know, appetizers aren't bad at all.

June 22 (Dynamite) - Penta Oscuro vs. Malakai Black (All-Atlantic Championship Qualifying Match)

It's not that this rivalry is bad, it's just... I guess it's kind of undercooked mainly due to travel issues between most of the participants in this feud?

June 22 (Dynamite) - "Hangman" Adam Page vs. Silas Young

They had a rivalry in Ring of Honor? I'm going to have to look into the past when I get the chance.

I mean, what else is there to say? My boy don't miss in his matches.

June 24 (Rampage) - Andrade el Idolo vs. Rey Fenix

...and this match didn't make it to Forbidden Door because a certain company didn't want them there. Whoops. It's basically a PPV style match before the PPV.

June 24 (Rampage) - Cash Wheeler vs. Jeff Cobb

...okay, I think it's time that we talked about Cash being a singles and tag guy, too. Pretty sure if you asked me who my favorite FTR guy is, I'd probably answer with... "Yes."

June 26 (AEW x NJPW: Forbidden Door) - ...the other men's matches on the main card. Yes, the rest of them.

Man, this PPV was cursed. But it still delivered. The Buy-In was no slouch, and I would suggest that you should watch it if you didn't, but the main card had a lot. The good heavily outweighed the bad here. So, let me list all of the good stuff:

-7 Star FTR!
-PAC finally has a belt!
-Sting's entrance! Seriously... Sting is 63.
-Welcome to AEW, Claudio Castagnoli! I admit that I laughed at the near pinfall practically 20 seconds into the match.

...did I mention that PAC has a belt now? I did? Neat. Now I have one favorite guy with a belt.

The only minor downsides? And yes, I do stress that they are incredibly minor:

-Good opening match, but... JAS wins again. Damn it.
-The fatal 4-way for the IWGP Heavyweight Title was going well... until the finish. Unfortunately, Adam Cole did get hurt, which made the ending look incredibly weird. That's not his fault, but it did feel like he was being shoehorned into the match, unfortunately. Seriously, get well soon, Cole. (Then again, he was pretty much put into this match to eat the pin, because let's be honest... nobody really wanted to see Okada or Hangman get the role, especially since they were the previous IWGP Heavyweight Champion and AEW World Champion, respectively.)
-Main event was... sadly predictable. It wasn't bad by any means (because seriously... Mox and Tanahashi are nowhere near bad!), it was just predictable. It was only ruined by the unneeded JAS beatdown.
--However, let's be fair here; Jon Moxley finally gets to defend the world title in front of live crowds. He didn't get to do that when he was the second champion, so I'm not even mad that he has the title... even if it's an interim title.

All in all, the Buy-In was great, the PPV was great, it's all great.

June 28 (Dark) - Wheeler Yuta vs. Tony Nese (ROH Pure Championship Match)

Not bad at all, Yuta! Crowd still loves you!

...too bad that we needed yet another JAS beatdown after the match.

June 29 (Dynamite - Blood and Guts) - Orange Cassidy vs. Ethan Page

The best part of that match was the end.

That's not an insult, the end was actually pretty funny.

June 29 (Dynamite - Blood and Guts) - Well, Blood and Guts itself.

One. Hour. And that was all you needed.

What else did you need? Sammy being thrown down to the table? Claudio's giant swing on the top of the cage? Skewers? Thumbtacks? Angelo Parker skillfully fleeing before the eventual ass kicking?

Too much in an hour, honestly. Still damn good stuff.

Unfortunately, Santana ended up with an injury to his left knee and will be out for quite some time. Eddie Kingston also has an injury to his back. Get well soon. Criminy, there's a lot of injuries in AEW this year.

(Yes, I'm still blaming a certain match on January 5 for all of these injuries.)

Honorable Mentions - Women

June 1 (Dynamite) - Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D. and Jamie Hayter vs. Ruby Soho and Toni Storm (Part II)

Yeah, it was a good tag match. However, I hope this rivalry doesn't stagnate too hard to the point that we'd end up with a Part III here.

June 10 (Rampage) - Kris Statlander vs. Red Velvet (Part II)

Looks like Velvet got injured in this match, unfortunately. That sucks, because I actually like her.

June 17 (Rampage - Road Rager) - Jade Cargill vs. Willow Nightingale (TBS Championship Match)

So, uh... when's Willow getting signed? Seriously, sign this woman.

And once again, I'm so elated that Jade's improving so damn much. She had her no-nonsense character down pat from the get-go, but her in-ring work? She's definitely getting a lot more comfortable as time is going on.

"Because I liked it, okay?" Mentions

June 1 (Dynamite) - The Return of the Redeemer (Johnny Elite vs. Miro)

I noticed that during his return promo, he mentioned "the bastards, the punks, the cowboys, and the pagans, too".

Miro vs. PAC? Miro vs. CM Punk? Miro vs. Hangman? Miro vs. House of Black? (And yes, I actually had that third matchup on my title defense bucket list for the cowboy, but alas...)

Is Miro eyeing the AEW World Championship?!

I mean, this is the former TNT Champion, after all...

June 1 (Dynamite) - Wardlow Gets Sued.

"This guy doesn't even watch the product!"

Hot damn, Wardlow's grown on me so fast.

That and the fact that he basically called out that dumbass feud that wrecked the prestige of the TNT title helped, too.

Yes, I am biased in the "Because I liked it, okay?" section... okay?

June 8 (Dynamite) - "Hangman" Adam Page vs. David Finlay

Honestly, it's the third best match of that disastrous night. Not the best, definitely far from the worst, but still entertaining.

The cowboy lost the title and he's drinking beer again? Oh, no...

June 15 (Dynamite - Road Rager) - Chris Jericho vs. Ortiz (Hair vs. Hair)

It wasn't the match itself...

It was what happened at the end.

Fuego Del Sol turned heel?!

Nope, it was Sammy Guevara all along!

Not gonna lie, I lost my shit at the reveal. I enjoyed it. It's also a nice course correction from that stupid feud that he was previously in. I'll be honest, I will miss the cocky but kindhearted persona that he had when he was in his first and second TNT title runs... but I also missed his old smug ass heel persona, too.

My two favorite guys are now counterparts once again.

June 15 (Dynamite - Road Rager) - Wardlow nukes 20 plaintiffs.

Well, at least it caps off the end to a silly mini feud. Not the best thing ever, but decent fluff. I was more sold on the People's Court-style introduction, though.

June 20 (Dark Elevation) - Matt Sydal vs. QT Marshall

I can't believe that I'm actually saying this...

Because it's QT, okay?

June 22 (Dynamite) - Chris Jericho and Lance Archer vs. Jon Moxley and Hiroshi Tanahashi

As much as I complain and whine about the constant JAS beatdowns, this is what made me laugh:

What happened after the match. Mox and Tanahashi just stare at each other while everyone else beats the crap out of each other.

June 24 (Rampage) - Mercedes Martinez and Serena Deeb vs. Laynie Luck and Sierra

Well... it's not the match itself. It's the dynamic between Mercedes and Serena. Mixing dislike and respect is interesting, I'm not going to lie.

June 28 (Dark) - Willow Nightingale vs. Ashley D'Amboise

...will you please sign Willow?! For the love of all that is good, please sign her!

June 28 (Dark) - Matt Sydal vs. Jake Something

I dunno, I just liked it. That's the best I can say about it.

"We got a real problem here." Mentions

June 8 (Dynamite) - The Casino Battle Royale, where the winner doesn't really matter because he was just going to get run over by Mox anygoddamnway.

Seriously...

What the fuck just happened here?!

This battle royale was the opener. And everything terrible literally killed the momentum of this episode of Dynamite before it even got off the ground. I'm sorry, but even though there were three good matches listed above, they couldn't even save it.

The worst of it was when Swerve randomly went turncoat on Keith Lee, despite the two having beyond excellent chemistry for the past two months. Mind you, Ricky Starks and Powerhouse Hobbs were also in this battle royale, and neither of them were eliminated at the time. Why didn't they eliminate them instead? They're feuding, for heaven's sake!

And then Kyle O'Reilly wins only to be fed to Moxley in the main event. Note that I do not hate O'Reilly. He's nowhere near bad, either. It's just that... let's be honest, whoever won the Battle Royale was clearly not going to win against Jon Moxley, of all goddamn people. The man's been undefeated in singles matches since his return in January!

It probably would have made more sense if Mox faced off with the number 2 contender for the belt (which at the time, was ironically Wardlow... even though he had two losses this year, and was somehow ranked higher than Hangman, who only had one loss to his 2022 record at the time and was ranked fourth...), and the winner faced off against the winner of a certain match at Dominion to then head to Forbidden Door for the interim title.

Oof. This was a massive stumble and a half here. I know that something needed to be improvised since CM Punk got injured (and whose idea was it to put that man in a match almost immediately after he won the damn thing?!), but the landing just didn't stick, unfortunately.

June 15 (Dynamite - Road Rager) - Ain't this like the fifth time that Hangman got interrupted by Adam Cole? Jesus Christ.

Ironically, I sad this in a weekly watch party with my friends:

"So he's gonna speak, and then Adam Cole's gonna interrupt, and I'm going to groan in frustration."

Yep. That happened.

Only silver lining was Jay White breaking Cole's evil little heart into a million pieces, so that amused me.

To be fair, the problem isn't just Hangman being interrupted, it's pretty much about any babyface being interrupted when they're trying to cut a promo. This is becoming a very constant annoyance.

...just Rampage in general... - Women's match? Cut to commercial!

Damn, I know AEW just makes the women's division all about Britt and Jade, but did we have to have the only women's match on the card on just about every Rampage recently cut to commercial? It's almost like it's... an afterthought.

Come on, at least give the ladies something. They do get at least two matches... on Dark. But not Dynamite. Jeez.

Summer's just getting started! A new Battle of the Belts awaits us! Time to head to July and August!
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