Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Special Episode 6: Outcast Saga Lost in Sailor Moon World (Part Eight)

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Warning: This part contains graphic violence and another heavy dose of misogyny with a tiny sprinkling of slut shaming.

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Kyo L.: Hey, Sonia?
Sonia: Yes, Kyo?
Kyo L.: Where's Manic?
Sonia: He refused to sit through another chapter of this crap. He even left a note that said, "Screw this stupid fic, I'm gone." And unsurprisingly, we can't find him right now. And now Sonic's here to take his place.
Sonic: *waves* Hey. Been a while.
Kyo L.: Yeah, it has.

"Text" Talked or thought sentences.

(Text) Talked sentences in a foreign language as English when everyone else speaks Japanese.

;Text; Title of the scene song.

:Translations of a sentence in a language that isn't English, and small observations during the story:

Chapter seven: Bitter victory

Tokyo February thirteenth 2005

Benji arrives late to the house and found a minor mess in the kitchen.

Sonic: It's not his bodily fluids, is it?
Axl: Nah, that mess would be a lot bigger than that.

"What you are doing Haruka?" Benji asks seeing the wind senshi covered with chocolate stains.

Kyo K.: So... it's the fic's literal crap that's covering her.

"Tomorrow is Valentines Day and I want to make Michiru some chocolate. But all that I manage to do was explode it." She answers glaring at the melted chocolate bowl.

Rory: *as he's eating a bonbon* How the heck can chocolate explode?
Sonia: Who cares, it's just another excuse to make a woman incompetent so the Stu can shine.
Benimaru: Seriously. If a fic's so bad that its own sexism is that inconsistent... yeah, just stop.

Benji places his bag down and dress on his lab coat.

Miyu: *throws an apron at the screen* A lab coat is not an apron!
Kyo L.: But aprons are girly, Miyu!

"Let me show you how it is done." He says picking up a bowl. "Well I guess that I can leave them ready for next month."

He puts a thick bar of chocolate on the bowl and places it on the microwave. "Let's clean up the mess and we begin from zero." Benji says to Haruka.

Sonia: When you say "begin from zero", does that mean that you'll also go away?
Kyo K.: Pipe dream, Sonia.

"And you know how angry Michiru will be if she found her kitchen like this." Haruka nods paling and they clean it.

Sonic: Because Michiru's a glorified housewife from the 1950s who kisses the Stu's butt, as you know.

After three minutes Benji removes the bowl from the microwave and the chocolate is melted.

"So how you want to make it?" Benji asks. "Cherry combo; not a bonbon, maybe a large heart with it." Haruka replies.

Axl: What is it with these people and cherry bonbons?
Rory: They like whatever the Stuthor likes, I guess.
Axl: Ah, so it's the ladies turning into the Stu's mouthpieces again.

"You understand that Michiru has problems to make it and she is a good cook. How you considered in making them yourself when you are a bad cook?" Benji says to her teasing.

Kyo K.: Are you sure that that's teasing when you're just insulting her, you jackass?
Sonic: Uh... this guy really doesn't know what anything means.

Haruka blushes. "I didn't think that would be that hard." She mutters. "You are lacking condensate milk you know." He says pointing to the balcony. She blushes again.

Miyu: As opposed to what you're lacking. *pulls out a list* Let's see... humility, common sense, treating women like people... need I go on? Also, Haruka usually blushes when she's around Michiru, and it's usually when she flirts with her. So congrats on taking her place, you living black hole.

Benji picks a can and makes the candy. "Now I will only give you instructions, pick the mold and pours a layer of chocolate on it. Then you put the filling and put more chocolate over it and let it cool off." Benji explains. Haruka nods and follow his instructions. Benji leaves Haruka to finish her chocolate.

"Melt some white chocolate later and write something nice with it over the chocolate heart and make a pretty wrapping. I am sure that she will love it." Benji adds. "Thank you." Haruka replies. "You are welcome." Benji says moving to his room.

Rory: Uh... why was this here?
Sonic: To show how helpful the Stu is.
Rory: Uh...
Sonic: Yeah, we know it didn't work for us.

On the next morning Benji wakes founding the house empty. He is aware that is Valentine's Day and that sooner of later at least two senshis will give him chocolate.

Benimaru: Hm. Aside from the one who is a lesbian, I don't know the other. Hotaru, perhaps?
Axl: I'll give him chocolate, but it won't be edible.
Miyu: I should've said this sooner. Granted, Michiru occasionally flirts with men, but she's always been faithful to Haruka. Of course the Stuthor probably took that and ran with it.
Sonic: Yeah, ran with it off the face of the planet and into space.

After dealing with his morning routines Benji is about to have breakfast when his watch-communicator alerts him of a message.

Kyo L.: *giggles*
Kyo K.: Alright, Fox Clone, what'd you send to him?
Kyo L.: Just a simple "Go to Hell!" message along with an ASCII middle finger.
Kyo K.: *sarcastically* You're one classy fox. I don't know why your girlfriend's family doesn't invite you to those swanky dinner parties of theirs.

He opens it and sees the content on the display. "Meet us on the Hikawa-jinja at noon. Do not skip or you will suffer. Ass: Hotaru." He sighs and picks his jacket and moves to the garage. In ten minutes he arrives on the shrine. To his surprise is empty even thought he is on the time set on the message.

Sonia: Oh, dear heavens... he's an idiot. He couldn't figure it out by the message alone? None of the Senshi would send him a message like that!
Sonic: Hey, sis, stop using your brain. He sure as heck didn't.

He doesn't enter on Rei's house but he can tell by the silence that there isn't a person there. Even the elder grandfather of Rei's.

Miyu: *annoyed* Yes, yes, we got that. Now stop with the useless padding and get on with it!

He moves back to the entrance and sits on the porch of the shrine, wondering that is odd the fact that Hotaru is late she is very punctual unlike few of the senshis. Not to mention that the message was not something that Hotaru would usually write.

Benimaru: *facepalms* Our hero. Our hero who has bricks for brains.
Axl: As usual, the last horse finally crosses the finish line.

Getting worried Benji gets on his bike and makes the inverse route of Hotaru's high school to the shrine. He can see very few students leaving the school and the noise of a couple of still practicing clubs. Benji is still on his bike and he looks to the school. "Damn this isn't good." He whispers noticing the menacing aura that the building is giving. He summons his sword and places it on the bike frame.

Rory: Yes, let's summon the sword in front of those people. U R Intellimagent.
Sonic: Uh... he made a big ol' deal about not showing off his identity a couple of chapters ago, but this is somehow okay now. Yeah. Okay.

He can see that the students aren't seeing him since they are entranced by some power coming from the school.

Kyo K.: *smirks* Okay, now you're just making excuses to cover up that stupidity, aren't ya?
Miyu: Well, to be fair, the students wouldn't know anything since they're being controlled. It doesn't make it any less idiotic.

Benji doesn't like that. He can tell that something really bad is happening but he doesn't know why the senshis haven't called him to help.

Kyo L.: Because they're captured, you fucking moron! Seriously, you got a message that clearly didn't come from Hotaru, the Hikawa Shrine's emptier than 50 Cent's bank account, and you're sensing this odd energy! Duh!
Rory: *sings* He is so smart! He is so smart! S-M-R-T!
Axl: *chuckles*
Sonia: Of course they would be captured again. All so he could save them like the big man that he is. This is honestly getting tedious.
Benimaru: *sighs* It's been tedious for quite a while.

He rides until the school main building and leaves the bike there and enters on the building with his sword.

Sonic: Is that an extension for his--
Sonia: Sonic, we've covered that long ago. We said that it is. The sword is his penis.
Sonic: *laughs* You didn't have to phrase it like that, but okay!

Benji walks on the school. He is looking around as if waiting an attack or the senshis to appear.

Kyo L.: You're getting the former, because silly women can't fight! Herp-a-derp!

Around the school grounds there are few scattered students that doesn't even see Benji armed passing by him. But there are many monsters that attack him. Benji easily kills the bunch of skeletons and zombies.

Kyo K.: *bored* Oh, joy. Another one of these scenes.

"This really looks like Castlevania now." He commented after killing them all. A loud arrogant laughter echoes on the halls, Benji turns and face the direction where it came.

Axl: Oh, so his mirror image is going to attack?
Sonia: We don't need two of that idiot, thank you very much.

An energy ball hits Benji on the chest. His sword and all his weapons turn into energy and they are scattered around the school. "Let's see how you will perform just with that pocket knife of yours." The voice says in an amused tone.

Rory: Wait, so they're going to nerf him?
Kyo K.: You know damn well that it's not going to be a nerf. He's just going to pull some power out of his ass, as usual.

"Here are the rules of the game you will have to face all the creatures on this school grounds. Some of them will drop an item or weapon for you pick it quick before it vanishes. The enemies of a room will return after you leave it. But there are few rooms with out enemies where you can catch your breath. We locked your special attacks only if you defeat the most powerful monster of an area you will gain access to one of them. I am not sure if you will but we all will enjoy this."

Miyu: What kind of silly RPG nonsense is this?
Axl: Quick, slap one of those Pokemon TM discs on him!
Benimaru: Is there one for Explosion?
Miyu: Hmm. *looks it up* Yes, there is!
Benimaru: Good. I want him to blow up so we don't have to read the rest of this nonsense.

Benji curses. "Now it is like Metroid fused with Castlevania…" he mutters taking his butterfly knife from his pocket and readying it to battle. "Well I guess that I should stick with my usual strategy."

Kyo K.: Which is... be a dumbass so some Deus Ex Machina can fall into his lap. Can I force Yagami to read this garbage?
Sonia: Why him? You know that he'll kill you if you make him do that.
Kyo K.: Because getting killed by him -- well, if he kills me -- will be a lot less painful than reading this.
Sonia: Huh... you do have a point.

He walks into a room and kills all the skeletons of it, and then he walks out and kills once again the zombies and skeletons on it then he walks back on the room and repeats the process until getting a weapon and few items.

Sonic: *turns to the audience* In case you were lost, fellow readers, we're somehow still in the Sailor Moon fanfic section. Yeah, I don't believe it, either.

Half an hour later he is checking his inventory. "Well it is interesting to know that now I have that skill of games of having tons of things in a inventory that I didn't know that existed and that doesn't show at all." He thinks while counting his new found daggers and short swords.

Benimaru: *facepalms*
Rory: *repeatedly slams his head on the table*
Kyo L.: This Stuthor sure loves to kiss his own ass, doesn't he?
Axl: All that and then some.
Kyo L.: *makes a slurping sound*
Axl: *cringes* Yes... that's the "and then some" part. Thanks, Kyo.

"Four short swords and twenty six daggers. It is a good beginning." He commented moving to the next hall now with two short swords ready to combat.

Miyu: Okay, how in the world is he going to be able to hold thirty items on his person?!
Rory: He's got one of those Pokemon backpacks. It can hold everything, including your bike!

In another part of the school.

"He is doing better than all of them so far." The arrogant voice says looking at a large crystal that shows Benji fighting against the monsters scattered around the school. "Much better than the senshis."

Miyu: *sarcastically* Because women don't play video games. *normal voice* That makes no sense, especially when you consider that playing video games was one of Usagi's hobbies! And she usually hangs out at the Game Center Crown, which was also the location of the Inner Senshi's hideout in the manga! Not to mention that the Sailor V arcade game was actually a training simulator for them! Yes, the ladies played video games to improve their Senshi abilities!
Sonia: *angrily grumbles*
Kyo K.: *throws his hands up* Of course he's better than the Senshi at everything. Of course.
Axl: Wouldn't be a Macho Stu fic without that.

Another voice adds looking at the senshis trapped inside stained glass windows. "Let's see how long he lasts."

Courtyard

Benji picks up a baseball bat from the ground.

Rory: *writes* And then Sonia snatched it out of his hands and beat his brains out with it. The End.
Sonic: *chuckles* If only!

"Good more range and since those zombies and skeletons are weak it will be easy to beat them with this." He commented moving to another group of monsters.

Miyu: *pushes glasses up* That's no better, you idiot...
Kyo L.: Stop thinking, Miyu. He stopped thinking a long time ago.

Benji's bat turns the skull of a skeleton into dust. Benji keeps smashing the bat against the zombies and skeletons with the fury of a madman.

Benimaru: Well, he is a madman, so that makes a heck of a lot of sense.

Benji looks around and sees a small demon with feline features.

Kyo L.: Holy crap, it's Cassy.
Rory: *laughs* Yeah, right! She'd claw him into ribbons in two seconds flat!
Sonic: Considering that she was partly responsible for ripping the last screen apart, that is pretty true.

The demon runs to Benji tossing small boomerang like blades. Benji parries them with his metal bat and charges at the demon. When the bat connects with the demon a mist of black blood appears on the air for an instant falling on the ground as a thin and sudden rain.

Sonic: *flatly* Ow, the edge.

The demon's body vanishes and on its place a long knife remains,

Sonia: ...which is yet another metaphor for his penis...
Miyu: ...because this entire fic centers around it.

Benji picks it and places the bat on his back where it vanishes to his inventory as he equipped the knife. The black blade as in a combat knife with a saw on the lower halve of the back and a second edge on the upper half of the back, the edge itself with at least thirty centimeters long with brass knuckles guarding the handle.

Sonic: Can I just sleep through this?
Axl: You swapped with your brother, and you want to sleep?
Sonic: No, I didn't switch with him. He ran off.
Kyo K.: Yeah, I'd sleep, too. Especially 'cause we're dealing with another long and dull "action scene" followed by another dull wankfest about his "edgy" weapons.

"I have a feeling that this baby and I will be good friends." Benji commented with a smirk on his lips, it is clear that he liked of that knife.

Kyo L.: Ah, so he found his backup penis.
Miyu: Honestly, Kyo...

Benji looks around to see if finds another demon as the one that he just killed; he wants another knife like that.

Axl: So he can be his own tentacle monster.
Rory: Ha!

Benji repeats the process of leaving the courtyard and returning for ten minutes, seeing that it would take too long to get another knife he decides to move to the gym hoping to find the boss of that area so he can get some of his special skills back.

Rory: Well, that just wasted his time... and our time, now that I think about it. Wouldn't the Senshi be dead by now if he did all of that?
Kyo K.: Tech, you have to think in video game logic. The plot won't continue until he gets to the main room.

On his way to the gym Benji finds many object like demons that look similar to the earlier enemies of the senshis but less colorful and silly looking, the ones that Benji is facing now look more menacing that the youmas.

Benimaru: *turns to the audience* Hey, Sailor Moon fans? If you needed another condescending remark from this twit to complete your day, this would probably be it.
Sonia: *sighs* We got it, Stuthor. You hate this series that you're trying to make "edgy". Also, you really love to mock a series that was originally for an audience of young women, don't you? Big man on campus! Big man!
Miyu: No, no, he claims to be a fan of this series.
Sonia: Miyu, as your friend, I love you very much, but you know that that's utter bullshit.
Miyu: Oh, dear.

Holding the knife in the reverse grip keeping the edge parallel to his forearm Benji slashes the demons cutting his way to the deeper areas of the gym.

In another part of the school

Sonic: Well, we found the recipe for the school's meatloaf.

"He is performing much better than the senshis." A feminine voice commented looking at the large crystal.

Kyo L.: *grumbles* Merde. (Shit.) *mops up a large wank puddle*

"His kills are over the hundreds right?" "Right." The arrogant voice replied casually.

Rory: Arrogant. The bad guys are "arrogant". Suthor, you sure that you're not describing yourself with this bad fantasy that you call a "story"? Because you, my not-friend, are clearly arrogant.

"But he is only on the first level of challenge; I want to see when he enters on the main building." "It is not like the senshis even got there." the other voice commented.

Axl: Blah, blah, blah, because they have estrogen, and estrogen is icky and weak, blah.

"We should just have sent one of the tentacle demons to play with them." "Not now it would spoil the fun of seeing him fighting." The feminine voice said in a commanding tone.

Kyo L.: Yeah, because he'll be too busy jerking off watching the show. And who the hell wants to see that scene?
Kyo K.: Ugh. I would rather drink antifreeze.

"When he falls we send some to play with them."

Sonic: So... if he wins, he gets shilled because he's the best man to be a man. If he loses, we'll have one of Axl's dirty books coming to life. It's like this fic knows that it wants to torment us.
Axl: *scratches his head* I don't really care for tentacle monsters, Sonic...
Sonic: Well, you get my point.

Gym

Benji looks at the burning pile that was the boss of the gym, surprising when comparing to the youma like demons the boss actually looked like a very fat, ugly and bald gym teacher that fired energy blasts and summoned odd creatures shaped like vault.

Benimaru: *facepalms* Oh, that's wonderful. Let's insult a demon's looks. I guess that time monster regressed you to the age of six, didn't it?

Benji grabs a crystal that appears on the place of the demon and the crystal vanishes, he can nearly see the list of his attacks that were unsealed by getting the crystal.

Miyu: *puzzled* What?! That's it?! That's the entire fight?!
Rory: Stuthor's probably bored just like we are!
Kyo K.: *scoffs* I've been bored since minute one of this piece of crap.

"Okay that one gave me access to three of my long distance attacks." Benji commented looking around the now empty gym.

Kyo L.: And surprise, suprise, he shoots them out of his--
Sonia: Kyo! *sweetly* We got it.
Benimaru: At least he gets it, as crass as he is.
Sonia: No kidding.

"If this place is now following the Castlevania game series rules it means that in the next area they will be needed, I am better to plan well which attacks unseal to give me the best advantages."

Sonia: Wich would be nice, if we knew about Castlevania in the Sailor Moon section! Nobody told me that we'd have to deal with this!
Miyu: Oh, you know a bad habit that bad writers share, Sonia; you have to know what they know for some odd reason.

A small sound of a sudden movement of air makes Benji spin on his heels pulling the trench styled knife from his waist and a scythe styled hand axe from under his jacket, in an aggressive defensive posture.

Sonic: And because he tried to be all cool with that, he ended up twisting his ankle like a B-movie horror lady. Good job.

Benji is looking at a tall brunette woman that is wearing a revealing and tight two pieces white dress with dark red long sleeves; her hair reaches her knees and falls in a casket of lightly spiked black hair.

Axl: So we're reading another Stuthor fantasy on top of this fantasy?

She raises her hands in a gesture of non-aggression. "I am not your enemy today." She says to him in an unemotional but beautiful voice. "Then why you are here?" Benji asked not changing his stance even with her words and stunning beauty, he was getting used to be around gorgeous women.

Rory: Didn't this dummy say that he missed his family in the last chapter?
Kyo L.: Oh, Rory. Using your brain when he isn't.

"At this moment I am here as a neutral part." She answered calmly, clearly not disturbed with Benji's menacing and suspicious tone and stance.

Kyo K.: Well, I'm just disturbed with Benji. Period.

"I came here with out the consent or approval of the one behind this 'game' as you keep mentioning that is similar to. I am here to explain you the rules that were set on his game and yes we do follow certain rules when affecting such a big area."

Sonic: *as the woman* Yes, a big area... like my breasts. Because they have to be visible to you, oh great horny one.
Benimaru: Gah... really, Sonic?
Sonic: Really.

Benji relaxes his stance a bit still keeping his guard up, keeping the stance was tiring and he was already an expert in foreseeing sudden attacks, the woman was clearly not going to attack, but it didn't prevented Benji of keeping the weapons on his hands.

Miyu: He knows that she's not going to attack because he's a so-called ninja with perception abilities, and he knows that the stance is tiring him out, but he's going to continue. Hey, genius. Did you ever think about another stance that won't wear you out? Or just standing down in general? Oh, who am I kidding, he doesn't think.

"As you already noticed and is using quite skillfully you were giving the inventory." She says pointing at his hands and jacket. "While I do not believe that you will leave this area alive I will tell you that it is permanent, you now can store items and equipment there even outside our battle stages."

Benimaru: So... he can drag all of that weaponry into his black hole of a backpack. That makes a heaping zero sense.
Kyo K.: Video game logic, Beni.

"That sounds a bit odd." Benji commented casually.

Kyo L.: Hey, hey, we'll do the thinking 'round here, thank you.

"Why giving the inventory skill to your enemy? And before answering that what is your name? I kind of want to put a name on your face" "My name is Sin." She answered in the same tone of voice that she kept on the entire conversation.

Axl: *sarcastically* Yeah, she's clearly not evil with a name like that!
Miyu: Um... Sin? Excuse me? I think this Stuthor forgot an important theme when it came to naming villians in this series. They were usually named after gems or metals.
Axl: Then again, Sin is also the name of a lunar god, but we know that the Stuthor wasn't bothering to do the research on that.

"Sin, I guess that you don't like your name much." Benji commented.

Axl: ...what did Kyo just say a minute ago, you dingbat?
Miyu: Even though we're trying to stop ourselves from thinking. We're a bunch of hypocrites, aren't we?

"I bear no ill feelings towards my name and yes I do know the meaning of my name." Sin replied in the same tone.

Rory: Did she just tell him off?
Sonia: I'm glad that someone did in this heaping pile of garbage.

"Moving to the issue of the inventory." She changed the subject. "As the cost of the battle stage limitations imposed in our enemies we are forced to hand something as benefit to our enemies as the price of the stage."

Sonic: *stretches* Yep. Good night.
Kyo K.: It's three in the afternoon, Gumball.
Sonic: *as he puts on a pair of earphones* Yep. Good night.

"Limitations as the sealing of my energy attacks and spirit skills." Benji said in a plain tone. "Exactly." Sin replied. "While the advantage granted the inventory isn't as significative as the limitation imposed some people manage to draw most of the inventory, which is your case. The senshis suffered much more with the limitations imposed by Karajan's battle stage."

Benimaru: Are we supposed to care about this?
Sonia: For some reason, yes.
Kyo K.: The senshi suffered. They are the only ones who have suffered worse than we have, because they had to see and talk to this nitwit.

"I see, it does make sense since the senshis rely a bit too much in their planet powers." Benji mused casually.

Kyo L.: *sets himself on fire, screams and swears in French and Japanese before switching to English* I hope a California Redwood tree finds its way up your ass, you worthless piece of shit!
Rory: *hides under the table* Uh... he's really scary when he's angry, isn't he?
Miyu: That much is obvious, Rory.
Axl: So once again, this translates to... "Let's nerf the Senshi again! They're just here to ride my dick, as usual!" And what's the point of mocking them when he relies on his Stu powers to bail him out? Uh, hello, double standards, Stuthor! Think, man! You know, thinking? That thing that you do with the head that's on your shoulders?
Sonia: And to summarize it in the burning fox's language... "Holy fuck, does this fic suck."

"So why Castlevania?" "Karajan has taken a liking of what your people call video games." Sin answered with a small hint of disgust on her voice.

Rory: Hey, hey, video games aren't disgusting... it's just that Benji is.
Miyu: And there's yet another "edgy" name. I'm starting to think that theme naming must be "girly" and "stupid" to him.

"As you can clearly see he altered the location with his battle stage to a similar scenario of one game."

"Castlevania series, side scrolling platform adventure game." Benji corrected casually.

Sonia: *crosses out "casually", writes "smugly" in its place* Oh, sorry that she doesn't know everything that you know, Mr. Insufferable Prig. Go throw yourself in front of a moving bus.

"Personally one of my favorites, I give that guy few points for good taste."

Kyo K.: Translation: Thanks for making this to my liking. Because this fic has to be all about me, you know.
Benimaru: I would rather watch a snail crawl for a mile.
Kyo K.: Hey, anything's better than this crap.

Sin raises one eyebrow and cleans her throat. "Resuming Karajan wants to see you fighting on a similar scenario as in those things; he used the limitations to remove anything that might ruin his entertainment too early in the game." Sin continued back on her emotionless tone.

Axl: *confused* So... remove the Stu's weapons and have him fight on skill alone...? *scratches his head* I'm stumped. He went through all of this stuff easily, without magic... in a magical girl series.
Miyu: *adjusts glasses* Holy fuck, does this fic suck.

"My spirit techniques, ninja attacks, elemental scrolls not to mention the senshis' attacks." Benji listed the limitations. "Correct." Sin replied. "However as you noticed the inventory skill were gained and this bring to the reason of my appearance here to you. Just because you have the limitations of the battle stage on you it doesn't mean that you can't create new abilities that wouldn't be sealed by the limitations."

Benimaru: And yet, he's allowed to improvise while the Senshi can't. *buries his face in his hands* I hate this fic. I hate it so much.
Kyo K.: Hey, you said that you'd watch a snail crawl for a mile, Beni.
Benimaru: *muffled* This scene is going at a snail's pace!

Benji smiles naughtily. "You mean that even with three long range strikes limitation that I managed to unlock if I never used the attack before today and I create it now it won't be locked?" Benji asked for her to clear the doubts. "Exactly." Sin answered. "If you never performed the named attack before even you have conceived it before it is unsealed and can be used if you have acquired at least one unsealing crystal of the range of the attack."

Kyo L.: Oh, fuck this. *burns into a pile of ash*
Rory: *peeks from under the table* I'm alive, right?
Sonia: Yes, Rory.
Rory: Did my bonbons melt?
Sonia: No, Rory.
Rory: *as he crawls out from under the table* Oh, yay! Mom got the really good kind this month, and I don't want them to go to waste.

"I understand, so with this long range crystal I can perform three techniques that I already can use and as well use techniques that I never used or controlled before, it is tricky but handy." Benji commented thoughtfully. "I must also add that there is another benefit other than the inventory and the flaw in the seal." Sin said to him, looking at his eyes.

Axl: *laughs* Now we're trying to use flaws? For this garbage Stu? In this garbage fic?
Kyo K.: This fic has a major flaw.
Axl: And what's the flaw?
Kyo K.: It's still going!

Benji meets her eyes with his, looking deeply on the cold black pools of her eyes with his brown eyes.

Miyu: That just made my eyes a brighter purple with that prose.

"This is an elemental jewel." Sin said showing him a bright fire red gem contrasting the pearly white color of her right hand palm. "They act similarly to your elemental scrolls; they are actually far more effective. I am aware that you already collected one."

Miyu: Um... the Senshi have elements. In fact, each Senshi represents one. It's not that he can't have an element to use, it's just that he's really turning them into lawn ornaments with this stuff. This shouldn't be a Sailor Moon fic any more. He's just overwriting everything that makes this series what it is and giving it a giant slap in the face to boot! It might as well be called "The Benji Show"!
Sonia: Well, this idiotic "show" needs to be cancelled. Now.
Benimaru: And he has the gall to whine about how he's getting negative reviews for his so-called stories in his profile? Everything that we've read up to this point tells us why it is a giant mess.

Benji nods and pulls an icy blue octagonal lapidated gem from his left side pants' pocket. "They allow you to change the element of your attacks when activated, the one that you have is a ice jewel, if you find a jewel bracer you can equip it with your gem and change the element of your spirit strikes." Sin explained now showing to him a dark red colored bracer on her left arm. "You can activate the jewel with out a bracer, just one at time, with the bracer more than one and if they are of different elements you can select the element."

Kyo K.: *yawns loudly* Is this over yet?
Miyu: No, Mr. Kusanagi.
Kyo K.: Wake me up when we finally get somewhere, then. *falls asleep*

Benji nods understanding, now he would also look for that jewel bracer for sure would be better than his scrolls. "As you must have figured unlike your scrolls that destroy itself when used the jewels are permanent." Sin continued her explanation. "You can build same element gems in the bracer to increase the elemental power, but to use two elements at the same time you need a muzzle gem."

Axl: *groans in boredom* Nobody cares! Move on! I'm gonna start whining like a two year old if we don't get to a new scene in a minute!
Sonia: Funny thing, Axl; if you start whining, you'll still end up with more maturity than this Stuthor.

"Muzzle gem?" Benji asked now confused, there was a bit of too much information.

Sonia: Oh, the irony!

"Muzzle gem is a clear glass gem that will filter and mix the different element gems energy with yours to be used in mixed element attacks; it looks like that object that you call of pen driver." She answered. "Pen drive." Benji corrected.

Rory: *coldly* Please trip and fall into a bed of spikes. The world would be so much nicer without you polluting it with your smugness.
Miyu: Oh, dear. I never heard you say such a thing before, Rory.
Rory: I guess this fic just pressed way too many of my buttons.

"Whatever." She replied.

Rory: She said it a lot nicer than I did.
Sonia: Oh, that much is obvious.

"Now that ends my appearance to you."

Sin tosses the red gem to Benji that grabs it with his left hand. "If we are enemies why you are giving me this fire gem?" Benji asked holding the triangle lapidated red gem.

Sonia: *as Sin* Because things have to fall into your lap without you putting any effort into them, Mr. Stu.

"We are enemies but as I said before there are rules to follow when a battle stage is followed, one of the rules is the benefits." Sin answered emotionlessly. "Normally I wouldn't tell you about the rules or care to explain them, but in Karajan's selection of scenario to this battle stage there is always someone that gives a explanation and a item to the hero, in this case I am the someone that explains the benefits and about the gems and you are the hero,

Axl: Lie of the century!

now that I performed that annoying duty the menace level of the battle stage will increase and you will die wasting the time that I expend here explaining the rules to you."

Benimaru: Oh, please. He's going to live. Why even bother with this? It's just wasting everyone's time.
Sonia: And what is the point of explaining the rules to the "hero"? You're just helping him in the end!
Miyu: You know... for all this posturing that the Stuthor did about how "the enemies used to be silly and girly", he's doing a terrible job with this new set. For one reason... the enemies almost never gave the Senshi anything that would eventually help them in the end.
Rory: This guy's the worst writer ever. He's just making the enemies dumb on purpose so he can look better.
Sonia: He made everyone dumb on purpose in this stupid fic.

Benji nods understanding, not truly understanding the rules but content with the fact that they follow them.

Axl: But only he can break the rules, because he's not with the Silver Millenium, so ha-ha!

As mysteriously as she appeared Sin just vanished in the thin air with an off pop. "Teleport." Benji commented after hearing the sound. "The pop was the sound of the air filling the void left by her body on the space where she was.

Benimaru: *slowly* Stop. Holding. Our hands.
Sonia: *sarcastically* Thanks for treating the audience like idiots, Stephenie. We really appreciate it.
Rory: What a flippin' hack writer.

Anyway I have this information to digest soon, senshis to rescue and those gems to find."

Axl: Don't you mean "Senshi who will get on their knees and suck my dick"? Because you know that's what this fic's about. Don't even try to hide it.

Benji moves to the edge of the tall platform where he was standing with Sin falling a handful of meters to a lower platform to return to the ground level. Back in the ground level Benji leaves the gym now wondering where he should move in the school to find the senshis and that enemy named Karajan.

Rory: Hey, looks like the scene's over.
Benimaru: Finally. *nudges Sonic and Kyo K. awake*
Miyu: *pours water on Kyo L.'s ashes*
Kyo L.: *reforms, coughs* I'm going to need to figure out how to stop hacking one of these days.
Miyu: Well, this Stuthor's hacking a lot harder than you are.
Sonic: *yawns as he removes his headphones* We're getting somewhere?
Kyo K.: About time. Least it gave me another nap.
Sonia: That long scene is going to be moot. I bet you that the Stuthor just padded this out to add to his word count.
Axl: Hey, if there's a scene that doesn't shill him, it's pointless to him.

In another part of the school

"I feel very offended." Haruka said to the other senshis. "We never got that kind of aid." "We never got that far." Makoto commented leaning back on her glass prison.

Kyo K.: Oh, you silly women. Thinking that you can go out there and kick some butt in your own universe while a Macho Stu's wrecking it to pieces.

"And they do get a point that we are a bit too much vulnerable with out our attacks, at least Kaosu is kicking ass out there."

Sonia: *rolls her eyes* Of course he needs to be shilled for his universe bending powers. Do your work, mouthpieces!

"He is making us look bad!" Haruka exclaimed angrily.

Axl: Well, that is true. Not to mention that he made himself look bad a long time ago.

"He is trying to rescue us." Michiru said in a cold tone. "We should feel lucky that the enemy hasn't set tentacle demons against us." All the others nod agreeing at Michiru's words. "And it is our fault for not calling him when we felt the attack beginning and that we weren't able to draw most of the inventory."

Kyo L.: Holy shit, you're an idiot, Pod Michiru. First you shill this walking rectum, and then you continue to act like an asshole to your lover? Really?
Miyu: Of course it's the women's fault for not calling on the big strong man to do all the work for them!
Sonic: This fic... sucks.

"The inventory is useless!" Haruka shouted angry.

Rory: This entire fic is useless.

"What good it does to have a mystical space to store things?!" "Storing uncountable weapons to be used in battle." Michiru replied calmly, Haruka just gained another long time of strike. "If it is so useless why Kaosu is doing so well?" Haruka bite her lower lip unable to come with a reply.

Kyo L.: And as punishment for not kissing his ass, Haruka now gets more "strike time" for the punishment that she didn't deserve in the first place. You know what? Fuck you, Pod Michiru, and most of all, fuck you, Stuthor.
Miyu: Seriously, how long has that so-called strike been there? It says that we're in February.
Sonic: It's been in place since September. Yeah. She's been mad at her for five months because her lover was tired.
Kyo K.: I guess this must've been one of those "worn out pairings" that the Stuthor wanted to drive a wedge into. Yeah, we haven't forgotten your whining, Stuthor. *mutters* You hack.

"Come on girls we shouldn't be fighting among ourselves here." Ami said trying to calm down the moods.

Axl: Of course. It's because the Stu isn't here to watch it. All we're missing is a big ol' mud pit.

"Anytime now Kaosu will get us out of here and we will have to fight, we need to save our energy." "She is right." Yaten said backing Ami up. "Getting so worked up is useless now, we should watch carefully and learn as much as we can of how he deals with everything." Everyone nods in silence and watch Benji now running to the main building of the school.

Benimaru: And they've been fighting for the better part of... about four years in real time, and they need to watch how a "real man" does it? Really?
Miyu: *sighs* He should never write anything again, I swear.

Main building entrance

Benji takes a deep breath leaning against a wall tiredly; the entrance is now clear of anything alive, dead or moving other than him.

Sonia: You left out sixteen riffers. I'm sure that the four who thankfully didn't have to read this garbage would also like to have a word with you.
Sonic: Considering that they will speak with their bullets, grenades, wrestling holds, and metal chains? Yeah, he'll be dead.

For sure that Karajan person had a sick sense of humor in what came to demon making, in the beginning Benji actually thought that would be a rather easy run on a Castlevania game that he did uncountable times before, but Karajan for sure had played other horror games as Silent Hill or Resident Evil because of the fucking puzzle to be solved on the main building door.

Kyo K.: *condescendingly* Ooh, he swore! Edgy!
Miyu: I know that it's ironic coming from us about the swearing thing...
Sonic: Is he complaining that he had to put effort into this stuff? Dude, stop whining and get on with it.
Sonia: After all, being a hero is what you wanted... even though this thing's been gift wrapped to you.

The result was that Benji was forced to backtrack and look for something to use to open the door, in the end Benji found an odd looking jagged key in the gym roof that after killing everything in the courtyard and gym to get there and being forced to kill everything again to return to the main building. Benji expended half an hour trying to figure how to make the key open the door just to find that the key is also a puzzle and he needed to arrange it in a way to open the door.

Axl: *as the Stu* Oh, whaa, I had to do things because it won't fall into my lap! *normal voice* Oh, would you shut up!
Benimaru: Wait, so he's killing everything... while killing everything?
Rory: It's like an edgier picture-in-picture!
Kyo L.: Or an edgier Xzibit.
Rory: *laughs* That, too!

During that half an hour Benji promised uncountable times to shove the key up that Karajan person ass.

Kyo L.: Oh, there's a lot of things that I would like to shove up your ass, you entitled piece of shit. Maybe I should cram the Empire State Building up there.

Inside the entrance Benji was attacked by shoe lockets, shoes and a horde of demons dressed as students even some as teachers.

Rory: They tried to give him a lesson on writing a good story. Naturally, they had to die.

Benji checks his inventory and pulls a cereal bar and a can of juice from his jacket, killing makes someone really hungry and thirsty, not to mention the unspeakable feat of eating and drinking with a mask on.

Sonia: We're really trying to go for realism. In a magical girl series.
Benimaru: This is the same guy who tried to add realism to a cape. This is also the same guy with a vampire sword. He also has plot device gems that can give him infinite money.
Axl: Stuthor... your writing's more inconsistent than the 2015 Philadelphia Eagles.

Benji tosses the now empty can in a trash can that was actually the only thing in the room that didn't attacked him, he pulls a cigarette pack from his jacket and looks for a lighter. "Fuck." Benji muttered not finding it. "I must have left it in my other jacket." Benji sighs with the cigarette on his fingers. "The fire stone." Benji commented with a smile. He summons an energy ball that shines with a red color, he lights the cigarette and walks out of the room holding the ball. He smiles satisfied seeing a large number of enemies on the next room.

Sonic: Oh, now this is hilarious! He's trying to complete the "edgy" look by smoking a cigarette!
Kyo K.: He really has been watching way too many action movies, huh? *thinks* Oh, right... he mentioned action films in his profile.

Benji tosses the energy ball inside and closes the door. A loud explosion fills the air muffling the sound of the demons roaring in pain. "So practical." Benji commented puffing out a cloud of smoke while opening the door. He smiles seeing the corridor charred black and pieces of demons scattered everywhere, he walks calmly picking up the items for later sorting.

All: *facepalms*
Sonic: *snickers* This is hilarious and sad. Kid, you're not Duke Nukem. You're not in "Die Hard". You're nobody. Stop making yourself look dumber.
Miyu: Oh, my goodness... someone please throw this fic into a wood chipper.

In the senshis' prison

"That is cheating!" Haruka exclaimed seeing Benji tossing another firebomb inside a room before entering on it.

Kyo L.: Our thoughts exactly, Haruka. But you're in a Stu fic, so that means that you're wrong. But don't worry, we have your back.

"Way to go Kaosu! Cheat your way to the victory!" Minako, Usagi and Makoto cheer as one.

Axl: It's only okay if the Stu cheats! Lesson of the day, folks!
Rory: Okay, why is Usagi cheering, even though the Stuthor treats her like crap? And on the other hand... why is he now calling her by Usagi when he called her by Serena for most of this fic?!
Benimaru: Stuthor doesn't believe in consistency, Rory.
Miyu: Well, to be fair, Usagi tries to find the best traits in people. The thing is that her friends would usually dogpile on the one who hurts her in any way, and they somehow aren't doing that to the Stu.

"Where they got those pompons?" Seiya asked with a sweat drop on her forehead. "No idea." Michiru replied. "I won't even ask where they picked that routine. But I know that I will have to talk seriously with him about smoking."

Sonia: *flatly* Oh, look. They're now the Stu's cheerleaders. With random pom poms to boot. How hilarious. *rubs her forehead* Can someone please give me a cocktail of Alka Seltzer and CLR?
Benimaru: Wait, he's going to be chastised for his smoking? Just his smoking? Especially when he's done much worse... like breaking Seiya's hand, tying Rei and Usagi up like hogs, and nearly beating up Usagi? This little boy is a creep. I'm not even going to call him a man, because that requires him to be a decent human being, which he clearly isn't.
Miyu: Of course he'll listen to Michiru... I mean, after all, his brainwashing was the most effective on her.

Hotaru looks at her mother more surprised with her annoyance about the cigarette than over their current situation, as most of the senshis Hotaru fully trusts in Benji to rescue them, but she is still nervous about being helplessly trapped.

Kyo K.: Wait, now you're nervous about being trapped? You ladies have always been trapped in some way during this whole fic! I mean, it's a Sailor Moon fic, I really want to see you all do something that isn't relying on Jackass T. Douchebag to save you all here!

Michiru is almost playing cards with the sailor starlight; Ami is calmly typing something in her mercury computer which Hotaru hopes to be a research in how to escape from the windows.

Axl: *as he's playing Uno with Rory* Beat you all to it.
Rory: Yep. *places a Draw Two card down* Have fun, Ax.
Axl: *stares at Rory*

"Where he learned that?!" Haruka shouted surprised.

Kyo L.: Like everything else in this stupid fic. He got it out of his ass.

All the other senshis look at the crystal and see a replay of Benji tossing a pair of lightning balls at a large group of enemies, the first one implodes killing several of them as well destroying the floor in the blast area, the second used the vacuum of the first blast that brought all the remaining enemies in a tight pack and exploded blasting them to tiny bits.

Sonic: *yawns* Watching grass grow would be more interesting than this.

"Nice move." Michiru commented with a smile. "For sure is." Yaten added. "They complemented each other, the first strike brought the enemy closer of the blast area of the second that finished the job." The others nod agreeing now seeing Benji calmly moving by the corpses walking to the next area.

Miyu: *sighs as she mops up a wank puddle* Stuthor... it doesn't matter how many brainwashed minions shill your self-insert. We still hate you.

In the teachers lounge

Benji sits in an empty chair in the deserted room taking another deserved break from the constant fighting;

Benimaru: *crosses out "fighting", writes "cheating"* There. It's fixed.

a quick look at his watch tells him the fighting time that exceeded two hours with not so much advance. Benji stretches popping his spine and sighing with pleasure at the feeling.

Sonia: And because he popped it so much, he can't walk any more. Oh, well.

He rummage on the drawers and lockers in the lounge looking for items and is rewarded in finding a dark metal blue gem bracer. Humming happily Benji equips the bracer and places the three jewels that he found on the bracer founding eleven gem slots on it; he is quite content in seeing that the slots actually mold themselves to fit the respective gem. "Now I just need the muzzle gem." He commented in a content tone. "I am so seeing myself casting a storm charger now. I just need the muzzle gem, I need to kill more red head female teachers for wind jewels, and you never have too much elemental power."

Kyo K.: Can we muzzle his mouth instead? Seriously, how much longer until this stupid chapter is over?
Miyu: Just a little while longer, Mr. Kusanagi.
Kyo K.: *sighs* Oh, joy.

Benji stands up and leaves the room entering on a room filled with tall red head female demons dressed as teachers, with a battle cry and a broadsword Benji charges at the mass of demons.

Benji wouldn't deny that he was enjoying the whole game battle a bit too much, for once in a rather long time he was in a familiar environment and he knows the absolute truth of the games that the Karajan person selected and that truth is that the hero as that Sin woman said that he is always wins and nearly all the times the hero is a man, that is the reason that the sailor senshis failed to defeat the creatures in the school, while Benji is moving smoothly on the what he will be calling Castlevania high school.

Rory: *stammers*
Sonia: *screams as she slams her hands on the table* Oh, my god, go to Hell! *explodes into ash*
Rory: *lightly brushes Sonia's ashes out of his head* I'm surprised that I'm not deaf yet. But holy crap, that... wow. Stuthor, please stop writing forever.
Miyu: I... I... oh, my goodness! *places her head in her hands, begins sobbing* I hate this fic!
Kyo K.: *as he comforts Miyu* What the hell's wrong with you, Stuthor? Look, your crappy sexist writing made Glasses cry!
Sonic: *as he sweeps Sonia up* I think I just died on the inside. I'm also glad that the other ladies didn't see this.
Axl: *as he's grinding his teeth* This... mother... fucker.
Kyo L.: *as he also comforts Miyu, speaks bitterly* Get bent, Stuthor. Seriously... just get bent.
Benimaru: *facepalms* As if we needed even more proof that this is the most sexist thing that we've ever read. To the point where this monstrosity drove a lovely lady to tears. Stuthor, are you sure that you're a fan of this series?
Sonia: *reforms, clearly angry* How about I answer that for him? No. No, he isn't! Because a fan wouldn't write something this blatantly sexist and shitty! So, not only has he proven that he's not a fan, he's also probably a raging misogynyst who actually thinks that video games aren't for women!
Sonic: *thinks* Wait... combine this with his tantrum about Sailor Moon "stealing his kill"... oh, yeah, he's... very awful.
Miyu: *as she wipes her tears* The last Sailor Moon fic that I sat through wasn't this bad. Sure, it enraged me, yes, but it never made me break down like this.
Sonic: *as he hands a box of tissues to Miyu* Oh, trust me, this fic broke us all in its own special way.
Axl: Also, Stuthor, bring your dumb ass to the 21st century. I mean, I know that this may be a bit of a shock to your rather primitive caveboy mindset, but women have emotions and feelings! *points to Sonia* Also, some women can fight. So, uh... don't write stupid shit like that.

The hack and slash was good, the enemies other than the mini-bosses and the bosses are easy to defeat and he was building a very large arsenal with the items that he is collecting on the school making up to the once given on his high school nickname of 'junk collector'.

Miyu: Can you collect yourself along with this fic?
Rory: Of course he has to relive his high school days. What is it with bad writers being stuck on their high school days?
Kyo L.: I have no idea.

After two hours of constant battle the senshis are moved from the storage room where the windows where they were trapped was stored to the main building roof, they all knew that the game was near of the end, victory after victory Benji cleared the areas to the despair of Karajan.

Axl: Y'know, for this idiot trying to be realistic... he sure should be tired after fighting for two hours!
Sonic: Ah, so two more hours of constant boredom.

The senshis are now looking at Sin and a boy that doesn't look older than thirteen wearing odd black robes with an inverted bowl shaped hairstyle.

Kyo K.: Holy crap, it's evil Moe Howard.
Rory: *cracks up*

They had discovered that the boy was Karajan, the one that had set the battle stage. He was enraged with the lack of success of his stage to defeat Benji, which is currently in the middle of the process of killing the final mini-boss.

Sonia: Well, I'm enraged with this fic, so we're even.

Now removed from their previous location the senshis are unable to see what is happening, Karajan and Sin are watching in a smaller crystal, the senshis cringe seeing Karajan's grin at the fight knowing that it isn't a good sign.

Benimaru: *sighs* He's not going to die. I don't know why this fic thinks that we should be on our toes with the next "action" scene here.
Kyo L: This fic's just throwing enough dead herrings for me to open a fish stand.

In the stairway to the roof Benji is facing a tall red skinned woman with dark purplish hair that is wearing an excuse of an armor shaped as a bikini that did little to hide her sensuous body lines, not that it was much of a distraction to Benji,

Sonia: *angrily kicks the table over, constantly points at the screen while screaming incoherently*
Kyo L.: *curses loudly in French and Japanese*
Miyu: I feel like I'm going to cry again.
Kyo K.: End this fic or just end me. Because something needs to happen right now.
Axl: You know the rule, scantily clad women are evil and have no effect on the Stu's penis... even though that's what the entire fic is about. And that's despite the fact that he's trying to be a gentleman with a fedora rammed up his ass. *sighs* Fuck this guy with a table. *as he sets the table upright* Especially this table.

still the ninja was suffering to keep up with that final boss and her poisoned flames long sword.

Benimaru: *sarcastically* Oh, poor sexist you.
Rory: Uh... this Stuthor really does have some sort of fantasy of putting women "in their place" or something, doesn't he?
Benimaru: I... you know, thinking about that makes me ill, actually.

The demoness had scored several good hits on Benji, especially one on his right side were her flames consumed the flesh to the bones exposing his ribs.

Sonic: Okay, that's gross. Why is he still going?
Sonia: Because realism doesn't exist in this fic that's trying to be realistic.
Sonic: It's not trying hard enough.
Sonia: That's because this fic never tried.

In a desperate maneuver Benji manages to strike the demoness, however she also succeeded to strike him one last time.

Rory: *yawns* Yeah, yeah, get to the part where he kills her. Because women are weak and all. Now we can't even be sarcastic about that any more, because the fic just said it.
Miyu: There's only two chapters left, and we're practically running out of sarcasm. Now I'm just angry.
Rory: Can't blame you for that.

The senshis look at the access door of the stairs with a mix of fear, hope, expectation and nervousness; Benji was taking too long to finish that final boss and appear to save them.

Benimaru: But having the Senshi save themselves? Nope, that's too much!

With joy on their eyes and faces they see the door opening. Benji leaning on the now his poisoned flame sword walks by the door entering on the roof area.

Kyo L.: *boos*
Sonic: Why're you booing? He's badly wounded.
Kyo L.: I'm booing because he's not dead when he clearly should be! This is the second time that he's gotten away with this bullshit!

Karajan laughs madly seeing Benji's state, it was easily to see the wounds caused by that final fight as they drip large drops of blood on the gray floor.

Kyo K.: If Fox Clone over there wasn't booing, he'd be laughing madly, too.

The senshis gasp in shock seeing a bone deep vertical cut on the left side of Benji's face, exposing the now empty orbit were once was his left eye, the cut stopped two centimeters bellow his eye and began four centimeters above his eyebrow.

Sonia: *rolls his eyes* Are we supposed to feel sorry for him? Because trust me, it's not going to work for any of us.
Rory: Except for those pod people that hid the original Senshi in a broom closet.

"God Benji…" Hotaru sobbed and cried seeing his state, she isn't the only one who does it, Michiru is crying looking at him, so are Makoto, Minako and Usagi. Even Haruka was shocked and sympathetic.

Sonic: *annoyed* Oh, shut up! The sympathy brownie points aren't going to work here!

"It is over now." Karajan says in his arrogant tone. "You are going to die now and I will win this game."

Axl: Once again, the word "arrogant" is used to describe anyone who isn't the Stu or his crap Stuthor.
Benimaru: *looks up from his tablet and sees a fish on the table* What... is that?
Miyu: *sighs* Another dead herring, Mr. Nikaido.
Sonia: *plugs her nose* Oh, goodness, it reeks!
Miyu: *as she removes the fish from the table* Well, of course. Herrings aren't supposed to be that... pleasant smelling.

Before the demon can react the poison sword cuts the air nailing itself hilt deep on his heart. Karajan howls in pain as the sword poisoned flames destroy his insides.

Rory: *confused* What?!
Kyo K.: *tries not to laugh* Are... are you serious?
Benimaru: He's truly the master of suspense, isn't he?
Sonic: This is the biggest anti-climactic thing that I have ever read.
Kyo K.: *laughs* Hell, Sony Love wrote better action scenes than this! And they weren't even that great!
Kyo L.: *boos louder* Get off the stage, Stuthor!
Miyu: *thinks* Wait... I'm suddenly realizing something. This villain is about thirteen, right? And... there were demons that looked like they were about seven years old in the last chapter, right?
Sonic: Are you implying that this Stuthor hates kids, Miyu?
Miyu: Well, we're not him, and we're not inside his empty head, so we'll never know. But considering that this is a self-insert fic, I would have to say... maybe.

Benji stumbles the beginning of a dash before getting steady and charging at the demon with his katana.

With the stroke of the sword and the demon's head falling it is over, the entire air around the school grounds flicker begins to vanish.

Axl: That was the quickest jerking off that I've ever seen. Like... wow.

"Well done." Sin says to Benji. "The victory came to a high price but is yours, if you survive we will fight in another time." She vanish few instants before the windows trapping the senshis break and they are freed.

Rory: *turns to the audience* Now let me explain what teleportation is to all of you.
Sonic: *laughs, turns Rory's head around* Oh, no you don't!

Benji grabs his swords and store them looking at the group with his good eye.

Kyo L.: And that's the term for his cock hole, isn't it?
Miyu: Kyo!

"Sorry for taking this long…" he said before collapsing on his stomach. Hotaru is the first to reach Benji is hurries to try heal him. "Don't!" Yaten shouts holding Hotaru's hands. "Magic will kill him on this state! He has to be physically treated first to be healed! We have to repair the damages!"

Axl: *as Hotaru* I know! Now if you'll just let me nuke him...!

Michiru barks orders to Makoto and Seiya getting them to grab a wooden bench back rest and use as a gurney.

Kyo K.: So that's what the Senshi are reduced to. Frickin' glorified nurses.

With Yaten and Ami taking care of his condition the senshis run out of the school to Michiru's car to move to Ami's mother's clinic in hope of not being too late for him.

Benimaru: We lost hope in this fic ever improving in quality, so...

In a not so short while later the senshis now in their normal clothes arrive in the Mizuno clinic, already warned by the girls Aki Mizuno is waiting for them. In a hurry Benji is transferred to a gurney and taken to the emergency room by Ami, Aki and Yaten. "Out!" Aki shouts to the other senshis that tried to follow them. "Out of here now! You will get in the way instead of helping!"

Rory: Well, they're just shiny objects for the Stu, so yes, they'll get in the way.

The senshis obey in a mix of fear, shame and despair. They can hear Yaten telling to Aki what happened to Benji with complex medical terms and abbreviations that none of them understand.

Miyu: Well, we don't understand this fic or the Stuthor's bizarre thought patterns, so that also makes sense.

Michiru comforts Hotaru knowing that she took quite harshly what happened in her school and the words of the elder doctor. The others sit in the chairs of the hall hoping to hear good news.

Sonia: Unfortunately, he's not going to die. This is the worst cliffhanger ever.
Sonic: You're telling me, sis.

End of the chapter seven:

Kyo L.: Thank god that nightmare's over!

Please read and review. And I would like to thank everyone that have read and reviewed and to everyone that is reading this story even if you are not reviewing.

Sorry for the long time with out updates, it took a while for me to get over a block on this story not to mention problems with my classes and working in other fics.

Rory: He had a block? How can he have a block in a fic this bad?

I hope that everyone enjoy this chapter.

Axl: Oh! Oh! You expected us to enjoy this chapter, when you just showed your ass with all this sexist crap that you just shat out?! You know what, you can just bite my furry tail, you hack writer!
Sonic: Yeah, now tell us how you really feel, Axl.
Benimaru: I know that I'm not Axl, but I also know that I would rather electrocute myself instead of reading another chapter.
Kyo K.: Are we going to do another "write what we feel" thing here? Because if I start writing, I just might end up killing him like I accidentally did with that one Sue.
Everyone else: *quickly runs out of the room to find writing utensils and paper*
Kyo K.: *stunned* I guess they really do want me to nuke him.

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