Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Crazy Train, Episode 5: How a Spark Becomes a Flame (Part Five)

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Ten o'clock came and to my surprise, Kyo was punctual as he promised.

"So, the whole day is ours and you're not gonna get in trouble for anything…hey, why the long face?"

"Nah, I was just thinking what would happen if you get caught for this…"

"That's highly unlikely."

Kyo: *as himself* Besides, we're not in the 2000s... and I didn't post on this... Internet? What's an Internet?
Rory: *as Yuki* Beats me. I'm still trying to figure out what this... modem is.

"I don't know…"

"Come on. We have a whole day ahead of us…"

Something tells me this day is a lot more than what I bargained for…

"So, Kyo. Where are we going this time?"

"You know I play hockey, right?"

"Are you telling me you're going to teach me how to play hockey?"

(laugh) "Are you kidding? You wouldn't last a second in that game.

Axl: Coming from the guy who didn't last a second in tennis.
Mai: Coming from the guy who also can't last a second in tennis.
Axl: At least I'm honest, Mai.
Mai: No, you're not. James pointed that out.
Axl: *blinks* Well... you know... whatever.

Seriously though, what I was hoping to do was teach you how to skate."

"Really? But, where are we going to skate exactly?"

"There's a rink near the train station. I'll teach you there."

He's really going to teach me to skate? To be honest, I wasn't too thrilled about this. Maybe it's because I can't skate?

Rory: Well, Cassy can't sing, so it's all good!

We reached the rink and to our surprise, there were a lot of people there.

"Hmm, I thought it would've been an empty house today."

James: Says the guy who called in a bomb threat, thus letting the whole school out. Didn't think ahead too well, did ya?

"What do we need to do before you teach me?"

"First, we need the proper gear. Now, tell me your size and I'll find a pair of skates for ya'."

"Oh no. No way. There's no way I'm telling you my shoe size. That's almost asking a girl for her weight."

Rory: You know... I heard about the "you know what they say about guys with big feet" thing, but what's the joke if a lady has big feet?
Kyo: This may be the weirdest or dumbest thought that you'll have all day. I just know it.

"Tch, fine. Well, if you're not going to tell me, then you pick your pair. I'll pick mine and tell me when you're ready, how's that?"

We got the proper equipment; all we needed was to enter the rink.

"For the time being, just hold on to me, okay?"

"I'm scared, Kyo."

"Don't be. Like I said, just grab on and don't let go just yet. I'll teach you everything as we go along."

"Umm…okay."

"Well, what are you waiting for? Come on."

"Kyo, I'm gonna hurt myself, won't I?"

"Not if you just hold on and follow my lead. Just do what I'd do."

Mai: And never do what Rory would do, which is panic.
Rory: Hey...

And, even though I was grabbing Kyo's arm, I still fall down.

"I still don't get this, you know."

Axl: Just sew yourself to him.

(sighs) "Okay…hmm…let me go a bit on the cheesy side for a moment. 'Skating begins with proper posture for good balance: chin up, body upright, and knees slightly bent'. That's what our coach said anyway."

"And exactly how would that help me?"

James: Well, it'll help you by not falling on your arse, I hope.

"Like I said, just watch me for now. And later, I'll let you skate with me, then on your own."

Wow…I never imagined a guy like him would know how to skate. He was really good.

Rory: He, uh... plays ice hockey, Yuki. You kind of... you know, have to skate for that. *shrugs*

"Okay, now grab my arm again. And this time, hold on real tight, okay?"

"Gotcha…" (holds on to Kyo's arm) "…now what?"

Kyo: *as himself* Now merge into me like we're some kind of super being. *blinks* You damn chatterboxes are rubbing off on me.

"Watch…"

Eek! Never thought ice skating would be this exhilarating.

"Havin' fun yet?"

"Umm…still scared, but yeah…"

"Okay then. Now, turns are important for changing direction while maintaining or increasing speed. Look…"

"Kyo!! Not too fast!!"

It didn't last long though. As much as he wanted me to learn how to skate, I just couldn't get the hang of it.

James: It's like that time you taught him how to play tennis... only it's less painful since you're not falling face first into the ice. Thank goodness for that.

"Hey, Yuki. You alright?"

(panting by the benches) "Remind me never to try this again."

"C'mon, it never hurt to learn a new sport. Which reminds me…"

"What?"

"Hehehe, somehow, I recall a certain someone who really wore me out during a tennis game."

Mai, Axl, Rory: *snickers*
James: Well, I spoke too soon, didn't I?
Kyo: Pretty much.

"Are you saying this is payback for that day?"

(sits on the bench) "Hey, it's nothing like that. I just wanted to teach you how to skate, that's all."

Gee, he's getting all sincere again. I like it when he's like that.

Rory: Well, look on the bright side, Yuki! Fish can't skate!
Mai: At least she doesn't have the brain of a fish.
Kyo: I thought that's what those rabid "Fifty Shades" fans have.

"I know you really wanted me to teach me how to play tennis back then, but I just can't keep up, no matter how hard I try. And I guess it's pretty much the same story here."

"Yeah. I can't skate even if you teach me how."

"Just goes to show that people are good at various things."

"I agree with that."

Axl: Well, Rory, next time you're feeling stupid, just remember that you'll always have your Extreme Gear.
Rory: That always makes me feel better about myself.

"But hey, if you ever change your mind about ice skating, just let me know and I'll help you out. How's that?"

"That's fine by me. So…where are we off to now?"

"I don't know. I can't believe it's already 2pm. Time sure flies fast. Hmm…"

Just when things were becoming interesting, the day was almost through. Kyo leaves early tomorrow so I guess he needs his rest.

Kyo: Screw that, I'll just sleep on the plane.

"Hey, I know exactly where to go next."

"Where?"

"You'll have fun…trust me."

Moments later, we headed for the park…

"What are we doing here?"

"Since we only have a couple of hours left, I figured we'd just spend time…" (points finger at playground) "…over there."

Axl: Really? Alright. *sits on the swing* Maybe I won't get knocked out this time.

I know it would seem rude if I were just to go out laughing hysterically, but I'll confess. I was surprised Kyo would actually want to spend the rest of the day there.

James: Then can I laugh for you?
Kyo: No.

"I'll quote you on this one. 'You're not serious, are you?'"

"Why? Got a problem with that?" (smiles)

"Nothing. Nothing really."

I wonder what Kyo's up to? He's approaching the swing.

Rory: *as a golf announcer* And it looks like he may sit on the swing... no, no, he's going to motion for her to come closer.

"Well now, here's a familiar object. C'mon Yuki."

Okay, now I'm confused. Is he expecting me to sit?

Mai: No, he's expecting you to make sand castles. *softly* Just have a seat and relax.

"Yuki. Hello? Earth to Yuki. Just sit already."

"Huh? Oh…uhm…o-okay."

(begins to push) "Hey, what's wrong? You look like you're not enjoying yourself."

"No. It's not that. I…well…I…"

"Yuki…whatever's bothering you, tell me. Maybe I can ease things up a bit."

Axl: *as Yuki* I would like to know why all of these fangirls hate me so much. Is it because I'm not a fighter?
Rory: *as Kyo* It's a... it's a long story.

"You're not gonna get mad, are you?"

"I'm guessing it's about me leaving tomorrow, huh? Is that what's bothering you?"

With my choice of words and current tone, he read me like an open book.

Kyo: *attempting to read "Grey"* I don't get it. That hack said that she wrote this in response to people who said that her character was a stalker... even though he's clearly sounding like one in here. Why am I reading this crap?
James: Because you hate yourself.
Kyo: What a waste of trees. Remind me to recycle this junk later.

"Yuki, I already told you. I'm only going to disappear for a couple of weeks. I've only got important matters to deal with and once it's done, I'll come back A.S.A.P."

James: Oh, so he's an assassin. Which corrupt head of state's getting that bullet today?

I kept silent for the entire time. No words could explain how I felt that time. I know I've been spending too much time with Kyo lately. I guess he's really growing into me.

Mai: Hopefully not like a tumor.
Kyo: *waves "Grey" around* No, Gloomy; this is a tumor.
Mai: Point taken.

"Can I ask for a favor then?"

"What is it?"

"I want to be there when you leave."

"Sure…"

He sat on the other swing and we didn't say a word for a while. For a full five minutes, we didn't say anything to each other. The only things that can be heard that time were simply the gusts of wind and the chirping of birds. I couldn't even look at him…

Kyo: Something else was also heard. It happened to involve two squirrels and a hedgehog endlessly chattering.
Mai, Axl, Rory: Hey!
Kyo: *smirks*

"Yuki…"

"Huh?"

"There's really more into this day than just simply spend it with you."

"What do you mean?"

He kneeled in front of me, took my hand and…

Rory: ...found his cell phone that fell out of his pocket and promptly ordered a pizza. That guy was hungry!
Axl: *snickers*

"You know I'm not the most romantic guy, and I'm positive this isn't the most romantic place…but there's one thing I would like to ask you before I leave."

"Kyo…"

"Yuki…will you be my girlfriend?"

Mai: Yes.
James: *chuckles* Is your name Yuki... Mai?
Mai: *nervously chuckles* Uh... sorry.

In the back of my head, all I could say was 'oh my God'. For a moment, I thought I heard him wrong. Is he really asking me that question? I lost my breath that time and I sure took my time answering him."

Rory: Emi's old self answered a lot faster than that.
Mai: ...she never answered. He basically said, "You're destined to be with me," and she went...
Axl: "What? Really? Yeah, okay!" Yeah, really.

"…yes, Kyo."

After that day, he told me that he would take a train to Tokyo around 2AM because his flight leaves at 5AM. And he agreed for me to come with him until his flight leaves…

So yeah, Kyo was about to leave the next day. I didn't bother sleeping at all; I just rested a bit. It was really cold that night. We met up by the train station and there he was…all packed up and ready to go.

James: *as Kyo* Let's see, toothbrush, toothpaste... five towels, five pairs of socks. Yep, I'm all set!
Axl: *as Yuki* Wait, what? What about the rest of your things?
James: *as Kyo* You mean my school uniform? It has a different palette. I can wash that stuff.

"Hi, Yuki. Hey, you look awful…did you even sleep at all?"

"Yeah. I did. Didn't sleep much though."

Mai: *as Yuki* Darn neighbors thought that it would be a "great" idea to throw a loud party...

"You really should get enough sleep, you know. A scholar like you needs all the rest you can get."

Rory: *as Kyo* But me? I run on adrenaline.

"I'll sleep during the trip. So…we're off to Tokyo for now. I've never really been there. How about you?"

"I've done my share with Tokyo. I usually go there during the holidays. My relatives live there."

Kyo: *as himself* And no, I haven't met this... Usagi Tsukino. Is she related to those other Tsukino girls? You know, that one with the dark purple hair and her bratty green-haired sister with the sword? Hmm.

"I see. Well, there's the train. Is it okay if I help you with your luggage?"

"Nah, I've got it covered." (grunts) "…shall we then?"

We went inside and went to find good seats. Actually, since it was early morning, we didn't have to push any effort in finding good seats.

James: It's a train, not a movie theater. There's a lot of good seats on a train, right? Hopefully?
Kyo: It's only good if the train isn't crowded.

"So, here we are. Yuki…you're really sleepy you know."

"I'm not…" (yawns)

Mai: You really need to invest in coffee, Yuki.
Axl: What if she doesn't like coffee?
Mai: There's always tea.
Axl: And if she doesn't like that?
Mai: *pulls out a banana smoothie* There's always a breakfast smoothie.

"Hehe, come on. For now, get some sleep and I'll wake you up once we get there, okay?"

"Oh…okay."

And as Kyo promised, he woke me up by the time we reached Tokyo.

It didn't take long for us to reach the airport. A few moments after we arrived, his flight was about to leave. There were a lot of people there. In fact, I was even surprised that Athena was there. I wasn't able to talk to her since she was already boarding her plane.

Rory: Aww. But hey, Yuki, might as well use your new boyfriend to relay a message, eh? Eh?

"Well, my flight's here. I guess I'll be seeing you."

"Kyo…can you promise me two things?"

"Sure, as long as it's reasonable."

"Always keep in touch and take good care of yourself, okay?"

Axl: He can do the second one. The first thing? Oh, boy.
Kyo: Shut up. I'll call her after we finish this fic.

"I will…" (kisses Yuki on her cheek) "…I'll see in you a couple of weeks, okay?"

"Take care…"

I had no idea where he was going or what he was getting himself into. I was really worried about him.

Mai, Axl, James, Rory: *whistles*
Kyo: *sighs* It wasn't pleasant.

The last image of Kyo I remember was when he placed his finger by his lips and blew like he was putting out fire or something.

Rory: *as he pats his head* Yeah, the jerk just set me on fire by accident!
Kyo: *as himself* I said I was sorry! Man, you hedgehogs and your grudges...

Notes/Sources:

James: Holy crap. We have an author who did their research! World's ending, get to Mars!
Mai: About time. I think a whole lot of us were sick of bad authors who didn't do the research.

KoF fans know that the envelope Kyo was talking about is the envelope for the King of Fighters tournament

Note: In reality, Athena did have a crush of sorts on Kyo. In the world of KoF, no one really knows this fact. She has recently given up for the sake of her friendship with Yuki.

Axl: She did, huh?
Kyo: She hid that pretty well, because I sure didn't notice.
Mai: Oh, Kensou knew about her crush. Though... he stopped that when she gave up.

Orochinagi (Serpent Wave). Kyo's best known/trademark Desperation Move DM

Kyo yells this whenever he executes his DM KamiGomi in KoF 2001/2002 or known in KoF:MI2/2006 as Divine Dust. He only executes this during times where he's exceptionally angry in KoF canon, during 2001 (full appearance of NESTS) and KoF XI (Ash stealing Chizuru's powers) and, note to Iori fans, Kyo DID NOT steal that line

Rory: Exactly, because he hasn't taken him to court over it!

Kyo really did wear this outfit in the Dreamcast version of KoF '99, as a Striker

Kyo: Huh. I was wondering why that brown leather jacket and blue jeans outfit sounded familiar.

Back in KoF'94, one of Kyo's motives in joining the tournament is finding his 'oyaji'. He did find him in KoF '95 though.

Kyo: Yeah, uh... I also found him the year before that. It, uh... wasn't pretty then, either.

He did get to finish this song and sang in front of a crowd in '97. For more info about the song, check the RPG KoF:Kyo for the PSone; it is entitled "Pieces"

James: *singing* Cut my life into pieces...
Mai: No, not that.

Yeah, Kyo is REALLY awful at tennis. And yeah, Kyo got hit on the face once again back in '97 when Athena and Kensou asked Yuki and "forced" Kyo to play with them. source: KoF:Kyo for the PSX/PSone

Axl: No wonder he didn't want to talk about it.
Kyo: Duh.

I never really realized it until I began this fanfic. Kyo knows how to ice skate. If you know how to play ice hockey, you're bound to know how to skate first, right?

Mai: No, they just play barefoot. I'm kidding.

Okay, sure. Nobody really knows how they ended up together in the first place, but hey, that's what fanfics are for. Also, in KoF reality, the playground REALLY means something to them.

Rory: This is probably the only time that someone will say "that's what fanfics are for"... and actually make sense!
Kyo: Might as well enjoy that moment.

In KoF:Kyo, he does have relatives residing in Tokyo.

Kyo fans will recognize this as Kyo's trademark win pose.

Special Thanks:

First of, I'd like to give my share of thanks to Lilac Phoenix for (A) showing me and (B) lighting up a new 'spark' in my passion for writing fan fictions. Next, thanks to Miz/M.N. for beta-reading this fic. I've made grammatical errors here and there…thanks for pointing them out and fixing it.

James: So, we have to thank those people who inspired this author who wrote a fic that didn't suck at all. Thank you.

Lastly, this couldn't have possibly been done if I weren't properly motivated. This person is a significant figure in my life and if it weren't for her, I'd be less of the man I am today. You know who you are…

All: Oh?
Axl: Sounds like we better thank her, too!
Rory: So, uh, what do we say? "Thanks for motivating him to write a nice fic!"?
Mai, Kyo: Yes.
James: Now get to writing, Hancock.
Rory: ...I thought that this whole riffing would be a "thanks" of sorts.
Kyo: Now you're just being lazy.
Rory: Coming from the lazy guy, that's saying a lot.

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