Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Neo Esaka, Episode 6: Sailor Moon:Fantasy! (Part One)

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Warning: This fic contains the following:

-Poorly done sex scenes (with some weird emphasis on pubic hair)
-And what possibly looks like urolagnia (a urinating fetish). Emi discusses it in this part.

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Sailor Moon Fantasy Read me and Disclaimer!

One: I don't own Sailor Moon and never will.

Kyo: Well, thank whatever god is up there for that.

Second, I like to write Hentai my way and if you don't like the descriptions I give, then don't bother e-mailing me or Iming me!

Benimaru, Emi, Keiko, Miyuki: ...
Kyo: ...riff this fic until there's nothing left.
Benimaru: *facepalms, sighs* I'm so tired of the "don't like, don't read" card.

As any Hentai, This series has descriptions of nudity and it is up to the reader if they wish to read it. And one last thing, this is a spicy romance story

Keiko: If it's spicy, then why do we have it?
Miyuki: So the fic can make you celibate for the rest of your life... and your next life.

anyway for those who love romances with the touch of some evil placed inside the stories.

Emi: Isn't that basically any scene that has myself and Master Kyo's clone in them?
Miyuki: Oh... no. No way.

Website: http://www.angelfire.com/sk/fantasyworldofsm/index.html

Anime Fantasy Knight

Emi: Of course, the author had AIM usernames, but we removed those. Also, don't even bother going to that website, it no longer exists.
Benimaru: Is it on that Wayback Machine site?
Emi: *shakes her head* Gone.
Keiko: And nothing of value was lost.
Emi: We haven't even started this fic yet. How would you know that this fic is terrible?
Kyo: Because we have it.
Keiko: Exactly, Kusanagi.

Sailor Moon:Fantasy! [Hentai]
Episode:01
"Serenity Get's Married!"
By the "Anime Fantasy Knight
E-Mail: -----@hotmail.com

Miyuki: Does Hotmail even exist now?
Kyo: That old 90s relic? Yeah, right.

Recommended for those 18 and over.
Note: This Sailor Moon Fan Fiction Takes place
just after Sailor Moon:R!

Emi: Okay, so this must've been before S and SuperS came to the United States.
Miyuki: Hey, at least we have a timeframe.

All the Characters from the DIC version of Sailor
Moon will be used except Serena. Instead, Serenity will be used. This Fan
Fiction contain words and descriptions of nudity. Read at your own Risk! Now
on to the
Story!

Kyo: Do we have to? I don't want to. I've read enough crap Sailor Moon fics to not do this.
Benimaru: You riffed one fic and a chapter of another fic. How is that "enough"?
Kyo: That one fic was "Outcast Saga", Beni. You should know.
Benimaru: Ugh. That walking norovirus of a fic...
Kyo: Yep.

~~~EPISODE:01 "Serenity Gets Married!"~~~

Emi: Wait... if it's supposed to be set after Sailor Moon R... then that would mean that she's still 14.
Kyo: Continuity doesn't exist, Emi.

Serenity woke up at 8:30 am. I was saturday.

Benimaru: We're suddenly in the first person after being in the third... and she turned into a day of the week. *chuckles* Wow, this is going to be a terrible ride.

When Serenity woke up, she was
not wearing anything. Her Panties were on the floor along with her Bra and
the other clothes.

Miyuki: Totally not an author fantasy here, ladies and germs!
Kyo: Hey, every author has a bias. I just wish that some of 'em weren't so damn blatant.

Serenity went to the dresser drawer and opened one of the
drawers. Inside were a bunch of panties. There was many to choose from. She
saw a pair of satin panties that had Rabbits and Moons. She got the pair out
and slowly put them on. Then she put a bra on. She got one of her many bunny
tee shirts. Then she got several pairs of shorts out. Serenity put one pair
on. The others she put in her book bag. She also did the same
for several pairs of panties. Now she put on some socks and shoes on and went
down stairs. Her mother greeted her daughter.

Emi: Wow, this is... this is bland. Did a malfunctioning robot write this?
Keiko: Yes.

Mrs. Tsukino: "Hello, Serenity good morning! happy birthday!"
Serenity: "Thanks mom. That reminds me. I have to go to the temple today."
Serenity grabs
a piece of toast and ran out the door with her book bag. She ran to the
temple all the way. Once she got there the others was waiting.

Benimaru: Did... did Sonic write this?
Miyuki: No way. He wouldn't write about nude people and panties.
Kyo: That's more like something that Spikes has in his dirty book collection.

Raye
spoke up.
Raye: "Good morning Serenity! Happy birthday."
Amy: "Happy birthday!"
Lita: "Happy birthday Serenity!"
Mina: "Happy birthday, Princess!"

Emi: So it's June 30. At least... it should be June 30.

Serenity: "Thanks guys. Were's Darien?"
Raye: "He had to go out of town for a few days, but he wanted to tell you
happy birthday." Serenity looked down. Serenity just sat there on the steps
of the temple and looked depressed.
A couple of hours passed and Suddenly for no reason, Serenity stood up. Her
body tensed tightly. She felt him coming.
Serenity: "Why didn't you tell me he was coming?" Raye and the others were
surprised.
Serenity: "Shit! I pissed all over myself again!"

All: ...
Miyuki: Well, that sure came outta nowhere!
Benimaru: Don't... don't they have bladder pads for this sort of stuff?
Keiko: I'm not one to judge that sort of stuff, Nikaido. Bodily functions and all of that.

Lita: "You should have gone to the bathroom and peed there insted of all over
yourself."
Serenity: "I could help my self. I had no control over my body. It seems when
Darien draws closer my body tenses tightly. I pee all over myself. I get
sweaty. My heart pumps faster. My blood pressure rises. My pussy cums all
over my panties. It's like my body responds to his appearance. And it is
doing just that now."

Benimaru: ...I'm very sure that there are bladder pads for this.
Kyo: Okay, what the hell did I just read?
Emi: Something rather crazy, Master Kyo. I'm starting to wonder if the author has a... fetish for this.
Miyuki: A pissing fetish?
Emi: It is a thing, Miyuki. It's called "urolagnia". Or in better terms, the "golden shower" or "watersports".
Kyo: Oh. So... the R. Kelly thing.
Benimaru: Gah...
Miyuki: Yeah, not my thing, but whatever floats their boats, I guess.

Raye and the others were shocked. Serenity shorts was
wet at the crotch. She was still cuming and peeing all over herself. She was
also nervous.

Keiko: And I was wondering if this is erotica.
Kyo: It's not. It's bad smut.

Darien finally showed up. Serenity's body throbbed at Darien's
arrival. She was happy to see him. Serenity couldn't move. She just stood
there frozen, and just smiling at her prince.

Benimaru: Yeah, nothing's more erotic than standing in front of your true love while your underpants are a sopping mess. I... *makes a face* I can't believe that I just said that. *shudders*

Darien: "Happy Birthday sweetheart! My beloved
Meatball head!" Darien had two gifts in his hands.

Miyuki: One gift was toilet paper, and the other gift was a pack of Depends.

Serenity answered back.
Serenity: "Hello Muffin! Thank you!" Serenity was still in excitement, but
she was slowly returning to normal.

Emi: Define "normal".
Keiko: It's not this fic, that's for sure.

Darien: "Serenity, why are you shorts wet?"

Kyo: Just lie and say that you suffered kidney failure.

Serenity: "I will talk to you about it later. Raye can I change in your
bathroom?"
Raye: "yes, go ahead. Lita go with Serenity and help her get cleaned up,
please?"
Lita: "Sure. come on Serenity." Lita and Serenity
go into the restroom. Serenity took off her shoes and her shorts. Then she
took off her panties which were completely soaked with Serenity's Cum juices.
Lita took the soaked panties and felt them. They were totally sticky.

Benimaru: I wonder if we can invite Axl to see this.
Kyo: We can, but do you really want to?
Benimaru: Uh... not really.

Lita: "I don't understand why your body would lose control like that."
Serenity: "It's like my body is reacting by causing those strange impulses.
It does feel good to me."

Keiko: You're not a magnet.

Lita: "How many pairs of shorts and panties do you go through in a day?" Lita
asked another question as she washed off Serenity's golden blond pubic hair
around her clit.

Miyuki: Oh, you can definitely tell when the "erotic" parts are happening. It's like having a tree stump rammed up your butt.

Serenity: "It depends on how many times Darien and I meet. The more we meet,
the more I have to change."

Emi: So... let me get this straight. She knows that this stuff happens, yet she doesn't bother to prepare for the next "accident"?
Kyo: Thinking is hard when your brains are in your crotch.

Serenity was totally cleaned up. Serenity then
put a new pair of panties and another pair of shorts. Serenity then put her
shoes back on. Lita and Serenity went outside.
Darien: "Are you okay sweetheart?"
Serenity: "Yes, I am fine."

Miyuki: And then she made a mess all over herself again.

Darien: "Here Serenity. Happy birthday!" Darien handed his two gifts. One was
large the other real small. Serenity open the large gift first. Serenity
opened it. It was Several books about famous Princesses throughout history.
Serenity
then opened the small box. Inside was a littler box that came open. Inside
was a wedding ring.
Serenity: "A wedding ring?" Serenity was surprised.
Darien: "Yes, a wedding ring. Your father felt that
it was time that you were old enough to marry.

All: At fourteen?!
Kyo: We're gonna get arrested before this part ends, huh?
Keiko: I sure hope not.

So that is his gift to you is
that we can get married." Darien takes the box that has the wedding ring and
Darien also takes Serenity's left hand and proposes to her.
Darien: "Serenity, my Princess, will you marry me?" Serenity didn't have to
think.

Emi: I don't think she was doing a good job of that before...

She spoke up.
Serenity: "Yes, I will marry you! I love you!" Darien then puts the ring on
her left hand.
Darien: "The Marrage will take place tomarrow at 5:00 pm. Let's go. Your
father said you can go ahead and move in with me."

Benimaru: Wait, what? That fast? You might as well go to Vegas and have an Elvis impersonator marry you two off!

Serenity: "Okay lets go." Darien opened the car door for his bride to be.
Then he gets it and they take off for Serenity's home.

Once there, Darien and Serenity moves all her stuff out of her room and
loads it into his car. Once they had all the stuff, they take off for
Darien's apartment. One there, they unload everything and Serenity puts all
the clothes away in her dresser drawer which was moved eariler by Darien and
Mr. Tsukino. After they were done Darien made dinner for his Princess.
The ate by candle light, which she loved. After dinner, they sat together on
the couch. For a while, they just stayed close. Then Serenity got up and
spoke to Darien.

Miyuki: *bored* Thrilling.
Keiko: So... we have no details of what they ate, either. A basic description would've helped.
Kyo: Nope, we just need to get to the bad sex as soon as possible.

Serenity: "Darien, please love me."
Darien: "I already been loving you."

Emi: *while eating a few cheese cubes* That just sounded like one of my old romance books.

Serenity: "That's not what I meant. I meant that my body must be loved and
played with. take off
my clothes and she what treasures await beneath my clothes. You must love me
emotionally and sexually. It's what I need."

Benimaru, Miyuki: *confused*
Kyo: *begins laughing*
Keiko: Uh-oh.
Kyo: Oh, this is bad. Give me some of that cheese, Emi.
Emi: Oh, dear. We're going to have a very dull sex scene now, aren't we?
Kyo: Yep.
Miyuki: Can't I just stick my head into a guillotine and call it a day?
Kyo: If you're the only one who gets to use it, then the answer's no.

Darien got up and lead her to
their bedroom. There was a larger bed that replace Darien's old bed.
Darien: "Sure, I will love all of you."

Benimaru: I'm going to love none of this.

Darien reaches down and unties
Serenity's shoes and also takes off her socks. Then he goes up and startsto
take off her shirt. Serenity lifts up her arms, so her shirt will come off
easier. Darien then moves for her bra. It unsnapps her bra. Serenity's
breasts flop out of her bra as Darien
takes Serenity's bra off. Serenity's breasts were
the size of small apples. Her breasts were nice, firm and round. Serenity's
nipples were hard.

Keiko: This is the most stilted and mechanical nonsense that I have ever seen. It's so robotic!
Miyuki: The robots are insulted, Kei.

Darien then moved down for Serenity's shorts. He unsnapped
her shorts and unzipped them. He lowered her shorts until they hit the floor.
For the first time, Darien had seen Serenity's panties.

Kyo: Wet or dry?
Miyuki: *snickers*
Emi: *lightly elbows Kyo*

Serenity: "Do you like my panties?"
Darien: "Yes, I do." Darien then took his hand down the front of her panties.

Benimaru: And we don't have a description of them. They might as well be Saran Wrap panties.

Serenity oohed and aahed has he rubbed her pubic hair.

Emi: So... the clitoris is located in her pubic hair? What kind of weird anatomy is this?

Darien
then took both of his hands and got ahold of the strings of Serenity's bikini
panties and started to slowly and gently pull down her panties. He noticed
her pubic hair was exposed ans he slowly lowered her panties. He briefly
stopped to look at the crotchliner area of Serenity's panties.
He felt of them. They were wet in the crotch area.

Miyuki: And any woman who tried to read this was dry as a bone.
Emi: *lightly elbows Miyuki*
Miyuki: I'm serious, Emi! You want to give this fic to Jessie?
Emi: No, I don't want to give this fic to her. Especially since she dealt with... you know...
Miyuki: I know. I was there. Yes, the sex scene sucked, too.

Then he continued to lower her panties. Her panties were not around her knees
all curled up.

Keiko: So the panties didn't exist? What kind of paradox panties are they?
Benimaru: They're Schrödinger's panties.

Darien felt the satin panties he had taken off of her. Darien continued to
pull down Serenity's panties until they reached her ankles. Then he lifted
her feet and took off her panties completely. She looked down at her
nakedness
and was happy. She wasn't embarrased that he took off her clothes.
Serenity: "Do you like what you see? Is my body pleasing to you?"

Kyo: Christ, this is so alien-like. All we're missing is a third breast on Serenity to complete the whole thing.

Darien: "Yes, very much." Darien then put Serenity on their new bed and he
looked at her Pubic hair. It was golden blond just like Serenity's hair on
her head.

Miyuki: *flatly* I would have never guessed.

He started rubbing her golden pubic hair. Her pussy lips were
swolen shut.

Benimaru: Don't they have ointment for that?
Emi: I'm not sure what anything is going to be used for in this fic, Nikaido-san...

He gently opened her pussy lips until he could get his fingers
into her clit.

Miyuki: Yikes! I don't think that anything's supposed to go inside of it!

He thwn took off his clothes and got on top of her. He rubbed
his penis on her clit. She moaned for
joy as he rubbed her fragile pussy.

Keiko: The heck? Is it made of thin glass?
Kyo: No, thin glass is just my patience with this fic.
Benimaru: That's your patience level for every fic.
Kyo: Except for one.

He then entered his penis into her
vaginia and began to move his penis in and out of the her vaginia.

Emi: *flatly* Please don't stop. I've never been more turned on in my entire life.
Miyuki: *laughs*
Kyo: *snickers*

Serenity
continued to moan with excitement was he increased in speed and motion.
Serenity: "Please don't stop, love me more!" Serenity moaned with happiness
as he was fucking her. Serenity's clit and vaginia became to ooze out her
natural love juices in response to
the wonderful feeling.

Benimaru: Well. That's... some pretty poor wording there...

For a couple of hours had passed since he started
fucking her. She was very excited. She was hot.

Miyuki: So hot that she spontaneously combusted right on the spot.
Kyo, Benimaru, Emi, Keiko: ...
Miyuki: Did I say something wrong?
Kyo: No, you're fine. We're just not amused because it's been "two hours later".
Keiko: *shudders* That fic...

He began to rub Serenity's
breasts. She increased her moaning in
response to her excitement. Finally he had stopped.

Benimaru: Without an orgasm?!
Emi: Well, um... doesn't that depend on the situation?
Benimaru: Yes, but that was just a whole lot of buildup for nothing!

He got up and started to
stroke the hair on her head as she was returning to normal.

Kyo: Define "normal".
Miyuki: It sure ain't this fic.

Serenity got up
from the bed and moved towards
the bathroom. She got cleaned up. Darien did the same. Afterwards they
decided to go to bed.

Emi: And now we have a missed opportunity for steamy bathroom sex.
Kyo: I'd read that... if it fell into the hands of a competent writer.

Serenity slept in the nude again as she always did.

Keiko: Because the author probably likes that stuff.

Darien was surprised that
Serenity slept nude. He always did the same every night. Serenity fell asleep
with her pubic hair touching
Darien's butt. She remained like that for the rest of the night.

Miyuki: This author has a fetish for pubic hair, huh?
Benimaru: Most... likely.

The next morning Darien had woken up. Serenity was up in her panties that
Darien had removed the night before and she made some breakfast that she had
learned in school.

Emi: You... you do realize that if her food looks good, it will taste terrible, and if it looks terrible, it will taste good, right?
Kyo: So we have to hope that whatever she made looks like hot garbage?
Emi: Yes.
Kyo: ...I'm so glad that you're cooking, Emi.

He got up and put on his underwear and had found her in
the kitchen. Serenity had no bra on yet.

Keiko: Cooking while topless. Probably another author fetish.

Finally the breakfast was done and
They ate together, side by side.

Miyuki: And by "side by side", it really meant "he ate off of her breasts".
Emi: There goes another competent idea...

After wards they went back to the bedroom
and Serenity took off her panties that she worn the day before. She spoke up.

Serenity: "Will you pick out the clothes that you want me to wear for the day
and dress me?"

Benimaru: *sarcastically* Now that doesn't sound vaguely sexist at all. Nope.
Miyuki: Maybe it's her trying to be cute. Now if she keeps doing this, then I'll really understand your thought.

It was an unusual request, but he did it. He looked in her drawers and found
matching pink panties and bra set. He got a pink dress from the
closet. From a drawer he also got a long slip. Darien also got Knee highs and
put them on her first. Next, he put on her bra. Then he put on her
silk pink panties on her. Then he put her slip on her. Then he helped her get
into her dress. He zipped it up. He then put some pink high heels on her
feet. He gently twirled her around. He took her to a mirror and showed her.
Darien: "How do you look?"
Serenity: "Like your bride to be!" Darien hten got dressed and the left for
the place of the wedding.

Kyo: ...why do I feel like I need to take a hot shower and scrub myself with sandpaper after this chapter's done?
Keiko: We... we will have to draw straws for that "honor", Kusanagi.

For hours they prepared. Finally Serenity had to prepare for the wedding.

Emi: They really need to learn what "time management" means...

Serenity put on her wedding dress which was her Moon Princess dress. Soon Her
father escorted her down the center of the church. Soon the two were side by
side.
Minister: "Do you Darien Chiba take Serenity Tsukino to be your lawful wedded
wife? To cherrish and to hold in sickness and in health as long the two of
you shall live and death do you part?"

Miyuki: You left out the part where they bonk a lot.
Emi: Wait. If this is supposed to be based on the dub, then Darien's last name should be Shields. *shrugs* But who am I to judge, really? At least it's his original surname.

Darien: "I do."
The Minster asked the same to Serenity. She answered.
Serenity: "Yes, I do!"
Minster: "With the power of the goverenmet of Japan,

Kyo: ...which is sounding oddly American...

I now declair you Mr.
and Mrs. Chiba. You may kiss the bride. Darien lifted up serenity's veil and
kissed her. Then they moved together outside as seeds and rice were scattered
by every body. Serenity and Darien both laughed.

Benimaru: And they laughed harder once the birds exploded.
Emi: Isn't that a myth?
Benimaru: ...yeah.

Now was time for the reception.

Keiko: Which will be filled with lots and lots of more boring sex, I'm sure.

NEXT EPISODE: "Serenity's Wedding reception!"

Completed: 11/06/97.

Miyuki: Wow. This fic is old, isn't it?
Emi: And it definitely didn't age well.
Kyo: *reads ahead* And Tsukino's right; we're going to have another boring sex scene in the next chapter.
Benimaru: *groans* Oh, that's great.
Keiko: *flatly* Hooray. Probably with more... hair?
Kyo: Yep.
Keiko: *sighs* Wonderful.

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