Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Neo Esaka, Episode 5: Lust for bust

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Warning: This fic contains the following:

-Basic sex scenes that are bland/make no sense
-Slut shaming

...that's about it, really.

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1. Lust for bust

Emi: I'm very certain that there are plenty of people who have a lust for busts.
Benimaru: "Plenty" is an understatement.

Finaly!- I said in sighning, having trouble finding the address of the model agency where Tina was supposed to be having a shotout for some mens magazine.

Kyo: Playboy? Hustler? Penthouse? Maxim?
Keiko: Any random porn site or magazine ever?

Excuse me, entry is not allowed without a permit.- said the guy at the front gate.
I showed him the permit and he let me in.

Kyo: Thrilling. I'm already missing the fic that I riffed on with Gloomy and company now.

You’re late, hurry up and you’ll catch the bikini session. I cursed in mysef and hurried up to see whats left for my eyes.

And there she was was, flashing all over her there were at least 8 guys taking pictures of her. Tina was barely nude, she wore her Taygeta swimsuit which cowered her nipples and the string was fighting not to expose her pussy which was really hard,

Kyo: Her... it... was hard? Kid... oh, boy. You need some damn classes, stat.
Emi: Well, just one tiny part gets erect, actually. And doesn't he mean "barely clothed"? Because "barely nude" means that she's showing little skin.
Keiko: Oh, don't you just love it when authors think that we know everything? Someone tell me what that "Taygeta" swimsuit is...
Benimaru: *looks it up* It's basically a purple microbikini with white star prints on the front.
Emi: Why am I not surprised that this fic went for a skimpy bikini?
Benimaru: Because imagination isn't a thing in fics like these, Emi.
Kyo: At this rate, she might as well be full-blown naked like in the last crap fic that we handled.

Tina had her ass sticking in front of the camera all the time, making all kinds of lustful poses for the eyes, breasts,hips,legs,face… she was perfect. I, like everyone else was wood from the mere beginning, and fighting with my friend was pointless, not I could.

Kyo: Oh, fu... why did I just imagine this guy fighting a sentient penis?
Emi: *with a puzzled look* Honestly, Master Kyo...

After 15 minutes

Ok people sessions over, Tina you’re the best!- a voice from behind echoed and everyone signed and left. Tina saw me and came to me.

Keiko: This fic's in the first person. She sure as hell wasn't going to go to anybody else.

So how was I?-she asked
I hope that’s a rhetorical but its good to see you too! She giggled and invited me to her room.

In her room

So did you liked what you saw?

Emi: I thought it was "Like what you see?"
Benimaru: That's correct... which means that it's wrong for this fic.

-she hit another question and again I played cool,calm and collected. I don’t know, mostly I missed the whole part but the end was great. Tina giggling came to me. Well poor you, I hope there is a way to make it up to you. Playing CCC now was out of the question, she made me pervert in late teens and since then all I wanted to do is fuck her and knowing her confidence I bet she knew that.

Keiko: *sarcastically* Wow, you have some strong goals in life.
Kyo: *as the narrator* They said that I could be anything in life! So I became a horny scumbag!

Without words we started kissing, sharing tongues and exchanging liquids,

Kyo: *laughs* Well, there's a new purple prose term for "swapping spit", huh?

she turned for a moment and locked the door so no one would enter, she looked back with her blue eyes and turned her attention towards my shorts. I knew what she wanted and pulled them down exposing 13 inches of fat raw flaming meat.

Kyo, Benimaru: *while laughing* Okay... no!
Emi: Why do Stuthors forget how anatomy works? Bigger is not always better! Seriously, giant breasts can hurt a woman's back, and a giant penis... well, how in the world are men supposed to deal with that?
Keiko: I have never heard of a penis reduction in my life.
Kyo: Those are the words coming from the Tsukino sister with the damn sword, so you know that I don't want to know about one from you!

We started kissing again and Tina with her left hand started rubbing my dick and balls. At one time without telling she inserted two fingers in my ass hole.

Benimaru: Well, there's a first. Will it go on for two hours, though?

Not able to hold it I let out a strong moan, she giggled and asked me- Do you like that? Yeah but I’ve would really throw myself in pleasure if you engulf it! The blonde bimbo

All: *stares at the screen*
Kyo: This is coming from the dude with a thirteen inch dong, talkin' about how he's all hard and crap. Really?
Emi: Oh, the slut shaming is real here.
Benimaru: Especially since she's just a friendly and flirty person.

obliged and greedily drove her mouth in my member.

Keiko: Thirteen inches. How the hell is she supposed to fit thirteen inches into her mouth?
Kyo: Uh... because. That's it. Because.

She moved forward and backward with her head, releasing kinky sucking sound, she was perfectly working with her tongue and I helped her by moving her head in faster movements.

Benimaru: Uh, let her do the work. Don't cram her head in there!
Kyo: Benimaru, do you know what you're doing? You're giving advice to someone who isn't gonna use it. That's like giving a computer to a monkey and hoping that they'll type out a Hollywood script.
Emi: We did that, Master Kyo. We already ended up with such wonderful films like "Ishtar" and "Gigli" from them.
Kyo: ...I think I should off myself after hearing that.
Keiko: Sounds good. *hands Kyo her katana* Here.
Kyo: Not with your sword, gaki. *hands Keiko's katana back*

Not being able to hold out much longer I told Tina to get her mouth ready. Obedient

Benimaru: Wrong. Word. Choice.

she moved she opened her mouth and showed out her tongue as wide as she could. After 5 seconds I released hot load of steaming cum and Tina with help from the tongue and hands swallowed everything I had to give.

Emi: And there goes my appetite. Thank you, fic. Thank you very much.

You’re quite delicious- she said with a big smile on her pretty face and I replied with a smile also.

Keiko: I'm not smiling.
Kyo: You never smile. That's not new.

The taygeta had trouble holding her breasts as her nipples were erect, I just had to move my hands around her back and not in a moment her ripe breasts were just for me to enjoy.

Kyo: And now her breasts are fruit. *flatly* What the hell am I lookin' at?
Benimaru: Whatever... this is. I don't even know.

I think its my turn to return the favor now-I sad as I pluged my mouth in her breasts. I started sucking and giving small bites first to her left and her right breasts.

Emi: Well, at least this fic has marginally better detail than the last "lemon" fic that we riffed.
Benimaru: Key word being "marginally".

They were sweet and big as melons,

Keiko: Enjoy those back problems.

Tina not being able to hold herself jumped on me and placed my dick in her pussy. Not having time to react I quickly moved to a wall and started working both inside and outside her. Tina with closed eyes was in an ecstasy and her hard moans and squeals were even escaping outside. Shut your mouth Tina or someone would hear us.

Kyo: Coming from the guy who moaned earlier. *sarcastically* Because, you know, women aren't supposed to enjoy that stuff.

Without response she moved her hand to a nearby desk and took a ball gag, placing it on her mouth, I saw a dildo also and pluged it deep into her ass.

Emi: What kind of pocket dimension did he get those items from?
Keiko: Beats me.

That will keep your every hole shut you perverted slut-

Benimaru: Coming from the guy who kept talking about his inhuman penis and how it's her fault that she got you all "hard". *takes a deep breath* Oh, you absolutely disgust me.
Keiko: You okay, Nikaido?
Benimaru: *mutters* I'm just peachy, Keiko.

saying that I continued even faster using every inch of strength I had to give the bimbo what she deserved,

Kyo: *sarcastically* Yeah, keep going with that sexy slut shaming there! Man, treating the ladies like objects is just so erotic!

leeks of drool dripped on my face as I enjoyed my meal,

Keiko: Thank you, Hannibal Lecter.
Emi: I have no idea why I'm imagining actual leeks falling out of Tina's mouth.

I looked her face and in any moment she was ready to explode, not even a ball gag could hold her squeals.

I’m ready too-I said as we both reached our climax I released everything I had in Tina.

Emi: Ah, yes, we have now reached the "climax at the exact same time" portion of the "erotica". Any questions?
Kyo: Yeah, I have one. Can I have an erotica that doesn't suck?
Emi: I'm sorry, we do not have an erotica like that in our collection.
Kyo: Damn it.

We both then lied on the bed to get some rest. Tina removed her ball gag and said- I knew you had it in you, I never have reached such levels of pleasure.

Emi: And of course the Stu of the day is the one who can best pleasure the "object" of the day. Figures.

My services are all yours to use-I said and we both put clothes on us.

Benimaru: He then ended up wearing Tina's Taygeta swimsuit.
Keiko: ...no. It's just going to look like an awful Speedo on him.

By the way a surprise should coming this way right about now! Not having time to reply a knock on the door was heard.

Tina unlocked and opened the door. A dark haired girl with dark blue eyes took my breath for a moment, she had a lovely pink hairband and casual denim jacket and jeans on her and her beauty rivaled that of Tina.

Kyo: Oh, no! No! Why do you have to bring her into this mess?!
Emi: I thought that she liked Ein... I mean, Hayate.
Keiko: She did, yes. But this is a bad fanfic, big sister.

Tina was first to open her mouth-this is Hitomi! And she introduced us. Nice to meet you-said Hitomi as we exchanged names and greetings. Tina again interrupted- I’m sorry but Hitomi and I need to have a girlie talk that would bore you to death,

Benimaru: Because real men don't like talking about "gossip" and all of that.
Kyo: *sarcastically* Now give me my dude wipes. I don't want to bother with that girly crap that you ladies call "Cottonelle".
Emi: *snickers*

but if you’d like to spend some quality time with us we’ll be at my gym tomorrow- saying that I left with only one ok walking slowly thinking only about the blue eyed beauties.

Keiko: And as usual, the Stu of the day is thinking with the wrong head.

In Tina’s room

He likes you-Tina was dissing Hitomi.

Benimaru: That's... not dissing.

He’s cute but I think its not nice to play match ups with everyone, I can do things on my own and I now what you and Lisa are up to. Then maybe you can help me-replied Tina. Well I guess only this time but then he’s all mine. They both giggled as they continued their conversation.

Emi: Was that even a conversation?
Kyo: No, and I don't care.
Keiko: Well, Kusanagi's right about not caring, because it's just another thing that shills the stupid Stu.
Kyo: Exactly.

Next chapter: Tina gets her backdoor pumped hard and Hitomi fills her mouth with steaming cum.

Keiko: *flatly* Joy.
Benimaru: *flatly* Can't wait for that exciting scene.

2. Workout at the gym

Notes:guys this is my first fic,

All: No, really?

i have everything planed from the begining but i'm open for more suggestions for the story and make it better.

Emi: Suggestion number one: Get a beta reader.
Kyo: Suggestion number two: Ignore the first suggestion and proceed to burn the fic.

That night I only had Tina and Hitomi in my head, I watched Tina’s movies and looked thru magazines with one hand holding my fat friend who was still hot and in shape after exploding in Tina. Slowly masturbating and ogling my eyes were escaping and I fell asleep.

Emi: Holy... wow, someone's really desperate to get something out, huh? I mean... he just did the deed, and now we're going to this? Really? Really? Really?
Keiko: I'm surprised that masturbation exists.
Benimaru: I shouldn't be surprised that his "pal" is still somehow hard.
Kyo: Someone hasn't seen those Viagra commercials. They have those damn four hour erection warnings for a reason, kid!

The next day I woke up with my dick in hand, it was noon

Emi: How?! Does this guy have a job? How is he even alive? Why is he thinking about nothing but waking up, having sex, going to bed masturbating, and then waking up like that? How?
Benimaru: How? Because... well... look at it.

and knowing what was waiting me today I hurried to Tina’s gym throwing something on me in an instant as i rushed thru the door slaming it on the way out.

Emi: And he didn't shower. Or brush his teeth. Or eat. Oh, goodness, this is making me feel icky.
Kyo: *hands Emi a bottle of Bleeprin* Enjoy. Because you seriously need some.

At Tina’s gym

Arriving at my destination I noticed the two punching a bag that was about to snap. They hadn’t noticed me yet so I took my time to check them.

Keiko: Or creep on them, rather.

Tina was wearing a red workout set called Polaris: she had a hot pants on her that couldn’t cover her whole ass, the upper portion was the same story, her enormous breasts were screaming for the nipples to pop out, and her body was perfectly matched with red boots and red gloves. The sweat on the fiery red blonde add even more pleasure.

Emi: Nikaido-san... is that really a workout set?
Benimaru: *looks it up* Nope. Polaris is just a bikini top with shorts.
Keiko: I just love how this fic thinks that we won't know everything.
Kyo: And of course it had to be another skimpy bikini pretending to be workout gear. Kid? *chuckles* Oh, boy, you're freakin' lost.

Hitomi had her standard jeans with red polka dot bikini top, also her trustworthy hairband never leaves her hair. Sweat also covered her entire body.

Kyo: Yeah, that's what people do when they work out, you dunce.

The punch bag finally snaped and sand started to pour out. I started clapping and they finally turned and smiled at me. I see you’re both practicing for the Dead or Alive Tournament? Yes and I assume you enjoyed the view-said Tina with a smile on her face. Give him some slack Tina you’re gonna make him blush. Hitomi knew she wasn’t right but just wanted to add more seduction.You too sure talk a lot for someone so tired and sweaty, I can handle both of you!

Emi: I'm lost.
Keiko: Join the club.
Kyo: That's saying a lot from the dude who had his Doofus Jr. in his hand for how long now?
Benimaru: An eternity, probably.
Kyo: Probably did some personal Shop class crap, you know? Just went and glued his wood to his hand.
Emi, Keiko: *snickers*

Saying that they giggled, came close to me and pushed me on a couch. They took of their tops and my shorts reveling what they wanted to see.

Keiko: I didn't want to see that.
Benimaru: Nobody wanted to see that, Keiko.

Grabing their breasts Tina and Hitomi squeaze my member from both sides and started licking its head with their tongues. You two sure know how to please a man-

Keiko: "Man" being used very loosely here.

I complimented them and they just smiled at me. Seeing my face in pleasure both of them started giggling and added a little fun of their own, exchanging tastes from my dick with the tip of their tongues.

Kyo: *yawns loudly*

I think he’s about to cum-said Tina as they both increased their speed. Not being able to hold any longer I let out a strong roar as my repayed their services with a splash of lava cum of their faces and their breasts.

Keiko: *confused*
Kyo: Uh... what?
Emi: ...all I got out of that was that he turned into a lion and his penis turned into a volcano.
Benimaru: That makes a bit more sense than the thirteen inch penis... sort of.

Tina and Hitomi quickly started licking each other like ice scream not letting anything drop out.

Emi: That line would've ruined ice cream for Akiko...

How about now you return the favor-said Hitomi eagrly waiting me to plunge inside her. I took some seconds to get a grip and replied positively. She giggled and took of her jeans revealing nice pinky panties which after a moment they fell of too.

Benimaru: So... what, the floor has magnets that just rip them off? What?

Hitomi was nude and her body was screaming for sex.

Keiko: Her body was screaming, but she wasn't. Uh... huh.

Tina followed with removing her hot pants to expose her womanhood too. They turned their looks towards two workout benches and lied on their front to expose their asses in front of me. Knowing what they wanted took my hard wooded dick and pluged it inside Hitomi while with my hand I shoved three fingers inside Tina. Hitomi quickly started moaning as I pumped inside her while Tina was licking her lips with soft squeals as I rubed her pussy. Hitomi replied Tina’s licks as she connected their tongues. Seeing them I increased my speed letting out moans myself, enjoying the pretty view of Tina and Hitomi french kissing, releasing drool and kinky sounds from their mouths.

Kyo: "Kinky sounds"? We call them "moans", kid.

After some time Hitomi wasn’t able to share Tina’s kisses as she was deep in heaven enjoying my raw meat and milking her strength to the max.

Emi: Uh... what man calls their little friend... "raw meat"?
Benimaru: Don't even look at me.
Kyo: *shakes his head* Nope.

Tina noticing this angrily said to me- hey don’t think that I’ll be satisfied with just fingers I want your cock. It’s not fair Tina you’re such a greedy slut-Hitomi answered with the same anger. He wants me more and I’m his friend-Tina wasn’t about to turn down.

Keiko: Oh, great, that's just what we needed... two more self-respecting women fighting over a bland guy with an inhumanly sized member. My day's complete now.

After sharing blue sharp looks they turn over to me. Who do you like more?-they both asked. Not being able to answer i replied-I like you both but i think Tina needs a lesson about the importance of fair exchange.

Benimaru: So let's slut shame her once again!

Hitomi agreed as i humped on the greedy bimbo and showed 13 inches in her ass.

Benimaru: Exactly as I thought... and ouch.
Kyo: Holy... do we need to give this twit a lesson in anatomy, too?
Emi, Keiko: Yes.

Hitomi ducked under and placed three finger in Tina's pussy while placing her tongue where Tina and i were connected. Let's milk this cow to the last drop.

Kyo: "Let's milk this cow to the last drop." *heavily sighs* I'm literally surprised that I haven't reached for the booze yet.

Saying that i leaned on Tina and squeazed her breasts as hard as i could.

Emi: She's a person, not a sex doll. I know that this may surprise you, but women can feel pain, too.

Hey no fair-she didn’t get a respons as with Hitomi we continued to make her moan,scream and squeal in pleasure.

Keiko: Maybe it had to do with the fact that you're squeezing the heck out of her breasts and shoved thirteen inches of Stu Jr. into her behind! Maybe you knocked her out with that!
Benimaru: At this rate, I'm surprised that she's not dead.

I was also driven in pleasure pumpin in Tina's tight ass with Hitomi licking my cock, and i rubed two gigantic melons. Hitomi wasn’t having a bad time getting meals from me and Tina with one hand pleasuring her self with one Tina , and on the other side the blonde slut was driven into madness, her tongue was struck out with droll driping out and the blue shine was fading from her eyes, she was about to feint.

Kyo: Surprised that she still hasn't fainted. Also, way to be a hypocrite there.
Keiko: She's the "slut" and the "bimbo"... says the guy who wouldn't stop jerking off and getting erect to everything. Welcome to Double Standard City.
Kyo: What's the population, Tsukino?
Keiko: A lot... unfortunately.

Everybody was reaching the climax, i was doing everything i could to make the bimbo drop unconcious with the help of Hitomi who also was about to cum.

Benimaru: Newsflash: It's not pleasure if you're trying to make her faint!
Emi: Also, please, please stop with the slut shaming. Please.

Hitomi get ready, a big splash of sperm is about to cum of Tina and me. She wide opened her mouth as loads of steaming hot lava sperm filled her throat.

Emi: Okay, seriously... please do not describe your bodily fluids as "hot lava". It makes this look a lot less sexy than it actually is.
Keiko: It was never sexy to begin with, big sister.

She gagged a bit but swallow everything. Tina unconcious was still leaking from every hole and Hitomi wasn’t about to let anything drop up. My my quite the hungy one i see-i laughed and dissed Hitomi who turned at me and gave me a smile.

So how about a shower?-i suggested as all of our bodies were red and in sweat, with heavy breathes coming from everyone.

Kyo: I'll shower... with bleach.

Alright and then we can go out on a coffee or lunch, but what about her.-Hitomi pointed toward Tina.
We'll get her clothes on and leave her on the couch to rest.

Keiko: ...do you want to take her to a doctor first?
Benimaru: That's logic, Keiko.

Everything said and done after a session of making out under a hot shower i took Hitomi to an outdoor café bar for some refreshment and snack.

Emi: We're missing the memory wiper... mouthwash...
Kyo: ...harpoon gun...
Emi: Really?
Kyo: Don't lie, Emi. You know you want to use it.

At the café

So how do you know Tina-Hitomi started
She's my childhood friend,

Keiko: That's a funny joke.

we maybe could have ended togeter if she was not this ambissious,

Benimaru: He wasn't ambitious enough to spell "ambitious" correctly.
Emi: So they could've ended up together if she wasn't this ambitious. Translation?
Kyo: She probably wasn't dumping her hopes and dreams for his penis.
Keiko: As if Armstrong would want to be with him. What kind of nonsense...

besides we're more suited for sex buddies.

Kyo: Nothing wrong with that in general, I just find everything wrong with... well, everything in this fic, actually.

Hitomi in giggling continued-we'll i'm sure about that but she already has a female lover, its her best friend Lisa and they're quite the bedroom buddies.
Freezing for a moment i took some time to continue-I've met Lisa twice she's Tina's friend from college and wrestling.

Keiko: Thanks for holding my hand there. Really didn't need you of all people to hold my hand, though.
Kyo: Especially when you think about what was previously in his hands...
Keiko: Argh!
Benimaru: Maybe that's someone speaking to someone else. I can't tell. This fic's very awful at handling dialogue and narration.

Yes and they both work at DOATEC sharing the media,stock and reaserch department, i also have a permit entry and sponsorship from DOATEC thru Tina and she also hooked me a Chinese female partner but we're more like friends.

Emi: Yes, but considering where this fic came from...

After a déjà vu moment for me i replied-I follow the DOA tournament and know who are you talking about i would like to me her, but first do you have that permit with you i would like you tour DOATEC.
Hey i know what you want but since you're a nice guy

Keiko: *stares at the screen, grimaces*
Benimaru: Well, that's got to be the lie of the century right there.
Kyo: He's a "nice guy"? Hey, we're missing a fedora here!
Emi: I don't remember nice guys calling women "sluts" or "bimbos", though.

i'll give it to you-she reached down her pocket and took out a pen,piece of paper and a card. OK here's the permit and just to write it town…… my adress, you can come anytime and i'll introduce you with Lei-Fang.
You live together… yeah only friends-i dissed Hitomi.

Emi: Because women can't live together without having sexual relations. Then again, considering which fandom this is...

Hey Tina and Lisa live together too!
I wasn’t complaining

Benimaru: ...today.

After some quality time with Hitomi we kissed and both took our separate ways home. I decided to go at DOATEC HQ tommorow and pay Tina and Lisa a visit.

Next chapter:Introducing Christie, Tina and Lisa get their way

Benimaru: So... who wants to search to see if there are any more chapters?
Kyo, Emi, Keiko: *stares at Benimaru, shakes their heads*
Kyo: Beni, I would rather skinny dip in a volcano instead of looking for more chapters of this crap.
Benimaru: You had to phrase it like that?
Kyo: ...I forgot about the lava crap earlier. Oh, for the love of... I'm just gonna drink some bleach now.

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