Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Black Crow Crew, Episode 9: Sabrina's Adventure (Part Five)

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Sabrina's Lost and Found (Chapter 13)

Kyo: We found the body, but lost the brain. As a matter of fact, it was always missing.

Somewhere in the Desert...

Sabrina was running through the hot,dry,sandy desert,trying to find Sabre after Shadow accidentally told her to go by herself.

Jessie: And yet you listened. Where's Darwin when you need him?

She had been running for several days without food,water,or shelter.

Miyu: Um... why the fuzz isn't she dead?!
Cassy: Damn Mary Sues. They survive everything... even nukes.
Kyo: I told you that she was a cyborg.

"That Shadow! Ugh,he makes me so angry! I wish I could just find Sabre,fight him,and live my life!"

Kyo: Do you know what makes me angry? The fact that this fic's still going!

She continue to run at supersonic speed,

Cassy: Okay, we got it, she runs at supersonic speed! Now would you shut up about that, author? Please?

looking for any signs of Sabre.She saw something shine in her eyes,she tried to look,but the blinding light stopped her.

Miyu: It's the end of this fic! Hooray!
Jessie: Not quite, sweetie.

The light then turned into sparkles that kept on flashing.

Kyo: Oh, it's just her mirror image.

She was able to look a little clearer and saw something blue.She got close enough to identify the object,it was the ocean. "Ah,finally,some water!"

Cassy: I hope she swallows a tiny jellyfish.
Miyu: That's only if the huge salt intake doesn't get to her first.

She saw a sandy beach that was very crowded with people,closeby,there was a large city.She slowed down to a jog and looked around,there were many people staring at her,but she ignored them.

All: What.
Cassy: Y'know, hedgehogs are everywhere. She's not as special as she thinks she is.

She walked into the city and read the welcome sign.

Welcome to Paradise Island,Population: 20,000+

Jessie: *inhales sharply* There's an in-joke if I've ever heard one.

Sabrina walked into the busy city and saw many people,staring at her. "What are they all staring at?"

Miyu: *as a random bystander* Holy bananas, it's a Mary Sue!
Kyo: *as another random bystander* Kill it with fire!

She continued walking until she saw a public park.She ran to it and saw many people there as well,she didn't care.She saw some benches and sat down in one,she finally got to relax,but she was very hungry and thirsty.She sighed and looked around,she saw bike trails,sidewalks,memorials,a cemetary,a campground,many beautiful flower gardens.She stood up and went to a flowerbed and looked at the daisies.She picked one up and put it to her nose and smelled it.It had a very sweet fragrance. She thought of the flowers,it reminded her of Cream and her flower crowns.She sighed deeply and set the flower down.She stood back up and walked through the bike trails,they lead to the forest,she walked in and sat down in a bench.She looked around and saw a amall shack made of wood,she somehow wanted to go there,it looked just like Tails's workshop.She was able to get it off her mind,she stood up again and continued walking through the woods.She looked to her left and saw a small river of spring water,she walked over to it and sat on her knees.She cupped her hands and dipped them in the water,the water was very cold,she pulled her hands back out and brought the cup to her mouth and started drinking.The water was very clean and crisp,she drank several more cupfuls.When she was done,she saw something in the water,it was some kind of reflection,but it wasn't her reflection she saw,she let the water get still and she looked at it again.She saw her own reflection,but when the water got still,she saw Shadow's reflection next to hers.She turned her head,but nobody was there,she looked at the reflection again,but this time Shadow's reflection was gone.She stood back up and walked away,further into the woods,she started feeling lost,she decided to turn around and go back to the city.She started running and left the dark forest,she got out just in time to see the sun set.She started feeling tired and needed a place to sleep.When she got back in the busy city,it was already dark outside,the sky was clear and there were many stars showing very brightly.Sabrina found a small hill in the park,there were no trees,so she could see the stars.She layed down on the side of the hill and gazed at the stars.She looked at them and saw many big ones,they were the brightest,one caught her eye,there was a giant star that glowed a deep blue.Then she saw a smaller orange star next to it.It created a thought to her head,it reminded her of Sonic and Tails.She sighed deeply and saw a meteor cross the sky,she watched as the flying light disappeared into space.Sabrina statred closing her eyes and fell asleep.

Kyo, Jessie, Cassy: *snores*
*Miyu sighs and leaves the room. She returns with a large gong and bangs it once.*
Kyo, Jessie, Cassy: *screams*
Miyu: Thank you. Cassidy, please remove yourself from the ceiling.
Cassy: *jumps down from the ceiling* Dude! I wouldn't have been up there if you haven't banged that stupid thing!

Sabrina awoke the next morning when she felt something pull one of her spines.

Miyu: A group of scientists must have found her. I think they're picking her apart for analysis.

She opened one of her eyes and saw a little boy pulling her quill. "Hey,stop that! Get out of my hair!" The little boy was suddenly pulled away by a tall woman. "Sorry, my son does that to people sometimes,please don't be mad at me. I meant no harm."

Jessie: Yes, live well and prosper.

Sabrina sat up and spoke to the woman. "Ah,it's okay." Sabrina stood up and walked away.She walked into the woods and sat by the creek,she cupped her hands and dipped them into the water,she pulled her hands out and drank the water.When she was done,she looked to her right and saw a small lake and a waterfall,she walked over to it and decided to clean herself up here.She looked around to make sure nobody was around,she didn't see anyone. She started to take her shirt and pants off,then she took her white undershirt and set them all near a large rock at the base of the waterfall.She stepped in the water and sat down,the depth was up to her shoulders,perfect.She started scrubbing her arms and legs, then she started rinsing her hair in the waterfall.When she was done,she grabbed her clothes,stepped out of the water,and put her clothes back on.She walked out of the woods and started running,she ran through the city and saw a fast food resturaunt.

Kyo: *irritated* Sudeni isoide! (Hurry up, already!)

She saw someone handing a customer their meal.She ran up to them at supersonic speed and snatched the bag out of the customer's hand and ran off. The two people didn't know what happened. The customer started yelling at the waitress. "Hey,what gives? I want my money back!"

All: ...
Jessie: Look, I know that she's hungry, but she just set herself up to become a bigger jerkass with that.

Sabrina ran out of the city,but the edge of the city was the ocean.She started running as fast as she can towards the ocean.When she reached the ocean,she gently glided over the water with her speed,she didn't sink,she just kept going.

Cassy: I wonder if there are invisible floating rocks in the ocean.

About three hours later,Sabrina found land and stopped there to rest.It was a large island.When she arrived there,she wanted to find a place to rest,when she reached the center of the island,she saw a metal fence,she went closer for a peek.When she looked,she saw a very large building made of metal.She saw many robots surrounding the building.Sabrina decided to go check it out and stepped in.

Jessie: Dumbass. Where the hell's Darwin when you need him?
Miyu: You know the old statement that says, "God watches over fools and little children"? She's certainly not a child, as we all know.

Suddenly an alarm sound was heard,she started running into the area,

Kyo: ...and you decide to go in even further?! Are you kidding me?!

she saw robots following her,but they were moving slow.She was able to lose them and hid behind a tree.She heard a rumbling sound,then the ground started shaking,she looked in front of the tree and saw a giant machine headed towards her.

Cassy: Yes! Get her!

She jumped out of the way before the robot smashed the tree flat.She got away from the machine and ran towards the tower.

Cassy: *snaps her fingers in frustration* Damn!

Suddenly,she saw bullets and lasers fly by her,she stopped and turned around to see an army of robots firing at her.She moved left and right and dodged the bullets.Suddenly,she felt a hand grab her arm,she turned around and saw Sabre pulling her. "Sabre!" Sabre made an evil grin.

Jessie: *sighs* Yes, we got it, he's evil!
Kyo: You know, if this crappy fic cut out all of the filler and repetitive garbage, it would be six chapters long.
Miyu: You're exaggerating.
Kyo: Okay, two. Now that's some exaggeration.

"Ah,sister,we meet again!" He let go of her arm. Sabrina ran at him with full force,trying to knock him down,but he jumped out of the way and Sabrina fell to the ground. "Ha! Is that all you got!" Sabrina got back up and ran at Sabre again,this time faster.She shot a punch at him,it hit him in the arm.

Miyu: You couldn't just sweep him? You just had to hit him in the arm again?
Cassy: So... the formatting sucks, the characters suck, the plot sucks, and now the fight scenes suck.
Kyo: I'd actually enjoy this more if someone sucked my plasma out with a crazy straw.

"Ugh!" He took a few steps back from the force of the blow, he stopped and snickered,he clenched his fist,which made loud crackling sounds.

Jessie: Somebody needs more calcium in their diet.

"Good,I see you are more than a girl who fights!"

Cassy: *as Sabre* Yes, you're definitely a Mary Sue with annoying "Grrrl Powah" attributes!

Sabre ran at her and launched a kick.

Miyu: Did it hit her in the arm?

Sabrina used her arms and strength to block it.

Kyo: Holy crap, the Neanderthal Sue has invented blocking!
Jessie: Still doesn't save this crap fic.

Sabrina shot another punch at him,this time it hit him in the face.Sabre didn't move from the impact,he turned his head and wiped his face with his gloved hand, there was a red stain on it.

Cassy: You mean blood?
Miyu: Let's not jump to conclusions.

"Ha! I didn't even feel a thing!"

Jessie: Hell, he's probably turned into the furry Terminator now.

Meanwhile,a few miles away,Sonic,Tails,and Shadow were flying over the ocean in the Tornado.Suddenly,the three chaos emeralds started to glow.The bi-plane was going out of control.Sonic shouted and pointed out to the island ahead of them. "Hang on,guys! There's a chaos emerald close here!" Tails tries his best to keep control of the Tornado.The plane started going lower and lower until it made contact with the island grounds,rolling to a stop. Sonic hopped off the plane and looked around "Where are we?" Tails was holding one of the emeralds,the emerald was starting to glow brighter. "C'mon,Sonic! We need that emerald!"

Kyo: *grabs his large pair of pliers* You say that you need that emerald, huh? Well... get to your surgery, Doctor Prower.

Sonic lead the way,

Miyu: ...to the tip of the pencil.

Shadow followed close behind.They started walking inland on the strange island,the emerald getting brighter.Shadow felt a strong energy closeby. "Sonic,this way!" He started running toward the source of the energy,it was getting stronger,closer.Sonic stopped for a second and looked around, he saw a robot behind a tree,getting ready to strike. "Watch out!" Sonic,Tails,and Shadow all ducked before bullets passed right over them.Sonic ran at the machine and punched it,destroying it.

Cassy: I thought that Sonic was more of a kicking and spinning guy.

"Whew! That was too close!" Tails said with relief.Shadow suddenly started running more inland,towards the center of the island. "Hey Shadow,wait up!" They kept running until Shadow stopped in front of an iron gate. Sonic stopped in confusion. "Shadow, why'd you stop?" Shadow stayed silent.Then he pointed his finger towards a large metal structure.Below it were two people fighting. "It's Sabrina!" Sonic saw someone else there. "Yeah! It looks like she found her brother,too!" He pointed at Sabre.

All: *as Sonic and Shadow, pointing* Ah! Godzilla!

Shadow suddenly jumped over the gate and started running towards the battle. Sonic tried to stop him. "Shadow! Stop! what are you doing?!" Shadow was too far away to hear him.

Jessie: *as Shadow* I'm going to run into danger like a complete moron since the Sue stole my ability to think in this fanfic!

Sabrina was just about to punch Sabre when she saw a yellow blur hit him and knock him down.Sabrina did not know what just happened,but someone or something is helping her.

Miyu: Ignore the fact that she didn't deserve it to begin with.

Sabre got back up and ran furiously at Sabrina. "Why you! How dare you take me by surprise like that!"

Cassy: Yes, how dare she do what is allowed in an actual one on one fight... if you don't count the hedgehogs assisting her!

Sabre ran at her very fast and tried to tackle her,but then a blue blur went after him and hit him,stopping his attack.Sabre flew into a tree and crashed,breaking the tree trunk in half. Sabrina was getting confused. "What is going on here?!"

Kyo: Your little groupies are helping you, Mary Sue. Appreciate it... because we don't.

Sabre was feeling weak,he struggled to get back up,he did and ran at her again.Sabrina ran back at him and launched a powerful kick at him.It hit him in the

All: Arm? Shoulder?

face

All: Oh.
Miyu: Has anyone been hit in the stomach yet? I've lost the will to remember.
Jessie: Sabre was hit in the stomach before.
Miyu: Oh, okay.

and he flew into the metal tower. "Ugh!" He tried to get back up,but he was too weak to fight.Sabrina walked up to him and prepared to punch. "Time to finish you once and for all,Sabre!"

Kyo: See, this's how "Ultimate" should've ended.
Miyu: Kyo... I think it did end like that.
Kyo: No, Shadow became a Canon Stu to nuke a Gary Stu. That should've been rewritten.

Suddenly,Sabre started glowing white,then a bright flash appeared,then the light faded away,when sabrina looked ,Sabre was gone.Sabrina pounded her fist on the ground. "Darn! He got away again!"

Jessie: Yep, leave it to the ass pull powers to work their magic once again.

Suddenly,she heard a familiar voice,calling her. "Yo! Sabrina!" She turned around and saw Sonic,Tails,and Shadow running toward her. Sabrina did not expect this to happen,she just waved a friendly hi. "Hi guys! What are you doing here? Were you the ones who helped me?"

All: *flatly* Duh...
Cassy: How does someone with a low IQ live this long?

Shadow looked at the spot where Sabre disappeared. "Hmph,it seems that Sabre knows how to use the Chaos Control,he must have a chaos emerald with him."

Miyu, Jessie, Cassy: *facepalms*
Kyo: *gets up*
Miyu: And where are you going?
Kyo: To find a replacement. Or vomit in a bag. Something. I may or may not be back.

Shadow then stood up and walked over to Sabrina. Sabrina started getting mad.

Jessie: Ungrateful brat.

Sonic saw this. "Uh,maybe we should leave you two alone,okay? Let's go,Tails!" Tails got the idea. "Uh,yeah!" They both left. Shadow turned his head and was facing Sabrina. "Sabrina,I'm sorry about what happened last week,I was a real jerk! I was so selfish! I really didn't mean for you to leave.But the one thing important to me now is that you're safe and unharmed.Please forgive me!"

Miyu: Um, shouldn't she apologize for being an idiot?
Cassy: You're forgetting the first rule of Suedom Law, Miyu... the moronic and special one is always right, no matter how wrong he or she is.

Sabrina didn't say a word,she turned around and started walking away,but she was stopped when Shadow put his hand on her shoulder. "Please." Sabrina turned her head to see a very desprate black hedgehog. Sabrina was getting angry. "Why did you come here? Did you really think I wouldn't stand a chance?"

Miyu, Jessie, Cassy: Yes!
Miyu: You stink at swimming when the plot calls for it!
Jessie: Some guy always has to help you when you're fighting alone!
Cassy: And when you do fight alone, you always rely on your overpowered Sue-per powers!
Miyu, Jessie, Cassy: In other words... you suck!

Sabrina took Shadow's hand off her shoulder and continued walking away.Shadow started running to her and put his arms around her.Sabrina felt his arms around her and stopped,she turned around and saw Shadow hugging her tightly. She looked closely and saw tears in his eyes. "Sabrina,don't leave me! I never wanted you to leave! You are my only true friend!"

Jessie: *slams her head against her armrest*
Miyu: *jaw drops* What?!
Cassy: *frantically nibbling on the end of her tail* Dear god, why is Shadow crying?!

Sabrina was touched at what he said,she just stood still and said nothing.Shadow released his grip around the young girl and looked in her eyes,they were glittering with anger and sadness.

Cassy: And then Manic pried the Sue's eyes out and sold 'em on eBay.

Shadow backed away a few steps and started running away. "Shadow,wait!" Shadow stopped and turned around,Sabrina was walking towards him.She stopped a few feet in front of him and looked down at the ground,holding her arm. "Shadow, I'm sorry!" Sabrina fell to her knees,tears were in her eyes.

Jessie: *irritated* Oh, now you want to apologize! Screw you, Sue!

Shadow saw a single tear fall to the ground,he ran over to her and kneeled down next to her. He reached his hand out and lifted her chin, looking in her eyes. "Don't be scared.I'm here for you."

Miyu: *rolls her eyes* Chee-sy.

He pulled his arms out and wrapped them quickly around Sabrina,he pulled her close to him and smiled.Sabrina was feeling better about him being with her. "I forgive you,Shadow." Shadow continued to embrace her for a minute and let go of her. They both stood up.

Miyu: Oh, this is a Shadow/Sue pairing... isn't it?
Cassy: No, I think they have to kiss to confirm that, just like in all Sue fics.

"We need to go find Sonic and Tails,then we should check out that building.Maybe that's where Sabre went to." Shadow and Sabrina started running in the direction where Sonic and Tails went.

Jessie: Of course, since it's the only goddamned building on the goddamned island!

But they were not alone...

Cassy: *repeatedly smacks her hand against her face* Of course they weren't alone!

"Well,it seems that Sabre has found my new weapon! Soon,Sonic and his pathetic friends will fall and the world will be mine! MUAHAHAHAHA!!"

Miyu: *flatly* It's Eggman.
Jessie: Can't get any more typical than that.
Kyo: *returns, sits back down* So... what'd I miss, ladies?
Miyu: If I tell you, your brain will leak out of every pore on your head.
Kyo: Okay... and by the way, Jess... that glitter's piling up from under your door. I had to sweep it away.
Cassy: So that explains why you look like a Cullen clone.
Kyo: Go to Hell, Cassy.
Cassy: This fic's already sent me there.

Sabre Surrenders and Eggman is Found (Chapter 14)

Kyo: Thanks for spoiling the whole damn chapter, Suethor.

On the edge of the large island...

Sonic and Tails were looking around the edge of the strange island they nearly crashed on,they found Sabrina and Sabre fighting there,Sabrina defeated him,but Sabre got away.Sonic knew Shadow and Sabrina needed some time alone to talk.

Jessie: If you skipped out like Kyo did, these sentences will apply to you.
Cassy: And for the rest of us? Well, the author probably thought that we were too moronic to remember what happened two minutes ago.

They were gone for about a half an hour. "Hey Tails,let's go check on Sabrina and Shadow,I think they got things fixed up here."

Kyo: *mutters* And then some.
Miyu, Jessie, Cassy: *shudders*

Tails stood up and nodded. "Okay,I hope they're not fighting anymore." Sonic got an idea. "Hey Tails,race ya!" He darted into the forest of palm trees. "Hey!" Tails darted behind him,trying to get ahead. As they were racing towards the center of the island,Sonic ran into someone.Sonic fell to the ground and looked at who he ran into,it was Sabre.

Cassy: Because Dusk wasn't available.

Sonic instantly got back to his feet. "Sabre!"

Jessie: *sighs* Criminy, I think we got that!

Sabre,who was still seriously hurt from the fight with Sabrina,stood up and grinned.

Miyu: Was it an evil grin?

"So,you've heard of me,looks like I have to get rid of you,too!" He suddenly clenched his fists very hard,a strange white glow came from them.The glow spread to his whole body,then a bright flash appeared.Sonic was blinded from the sudden flash,he covered his eyes,the flash faded away.Sonic uncovered his eyes and saw Sabre still there,only this time his wounds,scratches,and bruises were gone,he was undamaged,he was healed.

Kyo: Oh, for fu -- did I ever tell you ladies how much I hate these random powers?
Cassy: Many times, dude.

Sonic gasped. "Whoa!" Sabre suddenly dashed at Sonic and punched him in the face.

Miyu: Did I ever tell you guys how much I hate these crappy fight scenes?
Cassy: Many times, dude.

Sonic flew in the air,but landed on his feet and sped back after Sabre,he started spinning in a ball and created a shield of air,hitting Sabre and throwing him into a tree.Sabre got back up and made an evil grin.

Jessie: And there's that evil grin.
Cassy: *daydreaming* A certain clone can do that a lot better than he can.
Miyu: *hands the drool bucket to Cassy*

"Hah,you're not as bad as my sister,this should be interesting." Sabre launched himself at Sonic and swiped his foot under him that tripped him.

Miyu: Yes! Finally, a leg sweep!

Sonic fell to the ground and got back up. "That smarts!"

Cassy: Did we go back to the '90s?

Sabre lunged at him again and kicked him in the stomach,making Sonic fly back and hit a nearby tree.

Miyu: And yes! We now have a hit to the gut!
Kyo: Took them long enough.

Sonic was feeling weak,he slowly got up and ran at Sabre again,this time he was slower,his leg was injured.

All: *flatly* How convenient.
Jessie: Come on out with your ass pull powers so you can save the day and do your other assorted bullshit, Mary Sue.

Sonic tried to punch him,but he was getting weaker.Sabre easily moved out of the way and punched Sonic again,he was slammed onto the ground,his leg was broken.

Cassy: *as the author* Did I mention that Sonic's leg was injured or broken? I did? Well, I'd like to say it again.

He tried to get back up,but the sharp pain in his leg held him back.Sabre walked up to him and prepared to punch him.

Miyu: Let's go, butt pull. Come on, butt pull.

Suddenly,two yellow blurs passed in front of Sabre, interrupting his final strike. "Hmm? What was that?" Sabre turned his face back at Sonic,who was trying to crawl away. Again,two yellow blurs passed him again,this time hitting him.Sabre flew through the air and landed on his feet. "What's going on here?!" Sabre heard a whistle behind him and turned around to see Sabrina and Shadow right behind him.

All: *flatly* Boom.

"Gah! You again! I thought I got rid of you in the city!" Shadow walked up to him and snapped his fingers. "Well,I guess you were wrong!"

Jessie: Yes, god forbid that he couldn't climb out of a trash can.
Miyu: Considering what we're reading, I wouldn't have been surprised if he perished in there.

Meanwhile,Sabrina ran up to Sonic and looked at his injuries. "Sonic! Are you okay?" Sonic was barely breathing,he was struggling for his life.

Cassy: Great, Sonic's now a weakling. Let's have everything horrible happen to the canon characters so the Sue can save the day!
Kyo: Christ on crackers, I hate this fanfic.

Sonic spoke between short breaths. "Hey,kid.You came just in time." Sabrina kneeled down next to him and put her hand on his. "Stay still,Sonic!"

All: Blah, blah, blah, heal, blah, blah, blah.

Sabrina's hand started to glow a black arora,the arora spreaded to Sonic's body.The wounds on his body started to fade away as the dark arora covered his body.The arora faded away,Sonic was able to open his eyes,he opened them and saw Sabrina sitting next to him.He sat up,he stood up,his leg wasn't in pain anymore. "Whoa! How did you do that?"

All: *irritated* Because she's a goddamn Mary freakin' Sue!

Sabrina stood up. "No time for that,Sonic! Shadow needs our help!"

Cassy: No, Shadow needs your help. Big difference, Mary Sue.

Shadow was fighting Sabre, he was launching a chop at him,he jumped out of the way and tackled Shadow to the ground.Suddenly,Sonic ran at Sabre and tackled him with full force. "That's for trying to kill me!"

Miyu: Did they train with a bunch of NFL players between chapters?

Sabre got back on his feet and saw Sabrina walking around,not noticing him.Sabre charged at her,Sabrina didn't see him and got hit by her brother.

Kyo: *facepalms* And this idiot's supposed to be the hero? Is her IQ set at random?

She flew across the palm forest and landed on the beach,in great pain.She tried to get up,but her arm was broken,

Kyo, Jessie, Cassy: Yes!
Miyu: The arm. It's always the arm.

before she was able to get to her feet,she was hit again by Sabre.She flew again,but then she landed in the water,in deep water.

Cassy: What is this, a song lyric? Quit being repetitive!

Sabrina splashed in the water,she tried to swim,but her broken arm disabled her.Water was getting in her mouth,she slowly started sinking.

Jessie: Please let her drown so we can end this fic.

Sabre watched as Sabrina sank into the ocean. "It seems your friend is falling in the deep end!" Sonic saw Sabrina sinking in the ocean water. "Sabrina!" Sabrina disappeared into the water,

All: Goodbye!

Shadow saw her sink,he pulled out his chaos emerald and was about to do Chaos Control,but Sabre came up from behind him and grabbed the green emerald from his hand. "Thank you very much,,just what I was looking for,a chaos emerald!"

Jessie: *woodenly* Oh, no! Will an idiot save the other idiots from Darwinizing themselves?

Suddenly,a dark light appeared from the ocean and shot up into the sky.Shadow looked closely at it from the beach and knew what it was. "Sabrina! Oh-no,Sonic will see her!" A yellow figure rose up from the water.Sonic watched as the figure suddenly flew at supersonic speed towards the beach, Sonic saw that it was Sabrina,only,she was different.He saw deep glowing red eyes,a dark black arora surrounding her body,her wounds were healed.

All: *facepalms*
Jessie: So the idiot conveniently saved herself, nullifying any chance of suspense. Christ.
Kyo: I swear, after this chapter's over, we're getting replacements for the next chapter... and only the next one. Agreed?
Miyu, Jessie, Cassy: Gotcha.
Kyo: *sighs* Good god, I hate this fanfic.

"Sabrina? Are you okay?" Sabrina stopped on the beach and looked around.She saw Sabre behind Shadow,getting ready to attack him. Sabrina disappeared into thin air,Sonic was astonished at what he saw.

Cassy: At what, the stupidity that this fic has?

'Hey! Where'd she go?"

Kyo: She can go jump up my butt, that's for damn sure.

Sabrina instantly reappeared behind Sabre and punched him very hard,knocking the chaos emerald out of his hand.Sabre went flying into the ocean,a huge splash appeared.Luckily,Sabre knew how to swim,he quickly swam back to the beach.

Miyu: That's only because he doesn't have an IQ of 2.
Jessie: Like the people who praised this thing?
Miyu: Oh, that's low.
Jessie: No, it isn't. One person gave this fic a ten out of ten for Style and Writing, Spelling and Grammar, Originality/Creativity, and Enjoyment. And you know that we don't see any originality, creativity, or enjoyment in this crap. That should speak volumes, Miss Prower.

Sabrina started speaking in a very dark voice. "You! You tried to destroy me! You shall pay!" Sonic was getting very confused with this,then he looked at Shadow,he was somehow cheering her on.

All: *groans*
Cassy: Why the effing hell on toast would you cheer for a murderous Sue, dude?!

Sonic walked over to Shadow and asked. "Hey Shadow,what's up with Sabrina?" Shadow started getting a little scared.He didn't want to tell Sonic about Sabrina's rage.He promised not to tell anyone else about it. "Sorry,I can't tell this to anyone,Sonic.It was a promise I made to Sabrina."

Cassy: You... stupid... jackass!
Kyo: *texting on his cell phone*
Miyu: Contacting a replacement, Kyo?
Kyo: Yes. And after I'm done, I'm handing the phone to each of you.

Sonic shrugged and walked over to Sabrina. "Sonic! Don't go near her! You'll get killed!" Sonic stopped and turned around. "Why?" "This Sabrina is different! She'll destroy anything that gets in her way!"

Jessie: Oh, now you want to tell him. What, did you want to wait until after he's dead, moron?!

Sonic backed away from Shadow and ran towards Sabrina.

All: *smacking their heads against their armrests*
Miyu: *as she's smacking her head* Why is everyone so stupid?!

Sabre was trying to hit his sister,but the rampaging yellow hedgehog kept hitting him.Sonic got to Sabrina and went to attack Sabre,suddenly Sabrina spoke in the dark voice again. "Get out of my way,Sonic!" She pushed Sonic aside and ran after Sabre,she used her powerful teeth to bite him.

Jessie: And now we're slowly beginning to see the abuse of the word "powerful". Are we done with this stupid chapter yet?!
Kyo: I wish, Jess.

Sabrina suddenly backed away,she put her hand out in front of his face,a ball of dark light formed in her palm. Sabre started panicing. "No! Not that again!" The dark ball in Sabrina's hand grew bigger and bigger,suddenly the ball stopped growing and shot out of her hand.The ball flew at Sabre at hypersonic speed and hit him in the leg,

Kyo: Because the Suethor got sick of abusing the word "supersonic" for now.
Miyu: Wait... she puts her hand on his face, and the blast hits him in the leg? I'd ask for some sense here, but this fic has none of it.

Sabre fell to the ground,screaming in great pain. Sabre stopped screaming and the island grew silent.He did not move a bit.Sabrina went back to normal and looked at Sonic and Shadow. "Uh,oops!"

Kyo, Miyu, Jessie: ...
Cassy: Oops? Oops?! What the fu -- that's all you can say after doing that?!
Kyo, Miyu, Jessie: Ooh, boy.
Cassy: *yelling* You know what?! I hate you, Sabrina! I hate you so much that I want to remove your intestines with a rusty spoon!
Miyu, Jessie: *slowly moves away from Cassy*
Kyo: *nervously scratches his head* Um... wow, Cassidy. Just... wow.

Sonic stared at her for a moment before he spoke. "How'd you do that,Sabrina? That was so sweet!" Sonic ran up to her and gave her a hi-five.

Cassy: *grumbles angrily*
Miyu: Um... did they just...
Jessie: Yes. He just praised the God Mode Sue for nearly nuking someone out of existence.
Kyo: *repeatedly slams his head on the coffee table* I! Hate! This! Fanfic!

Shadow walked over to the motionless Sabre and looked at him.Sabre's eyes were closed,but he was breathing. "Sonic,come here!" Sonic ran over to Shadow and looked at Sabre. "He's unconcious.What should we do with him?"

Jessie: Easy, let the Sue deal with him. After all, you two are now too damn stupid to even outwit a head of lettuce.

Sabrina walked over to them and picked Sabre up. "Simple.We make him talk,he said that he's with Dr. Eggman.Maybe that tower has something to do with this.Let's go." Shadow and Sonic nodded and ran for the center of the island.

Cassy: Well, the fic is called "Sabrina's Adventure" for a reason. It had to be all about her leading the way and other assorted crap.

When the four hedgehogs got to the area of the tower,Sabre started to wake up.He opened his eyes to find himself being carried by his sister.Sabrina heard him wake up and stopped walking. "So,you're finally awake.We need to have a little talk." Sabre didn't listen.He flipped over and got out of Sabrina's arms,but when he hit the ground,he got a very sharp pain in his right leg,making him collapse. "Ahh! What did you do to me?"

Kyo: You know what? I'm now convinced that every individual doesn't have an IQ of 1.
Jessie: Are you sure?
Kyo: Yes. In fact, everyone now has a collective IQ of 1.

Sabrina turned around and grabbed him by the neck,choking him. "Listen,buster! You are going to tell us what's in that tower,or else I'll have to break your other leg!"

Miyu: *pushes glasses up* This is why we don't use those Jack Bauer interrogation methods, people.

Sabre didn't hesitate and he rolled over,away from Sabrina. "Hah,you wish!" He was getting ready to use his healing powers,but he felt no chaos energy. "What! Where's my emerald?" Sabrina pulled something out, it was a white chaos emerald. "You mean,this emerald? Sonic,catch!" Sabrina tossed the chaos emerald to the blue blur, Sonic caught the emerald and put it away. "Sweet! Four down,three to go!"

Jessie: It's amazing that he managed to add and subtract.
Miyu: *adjusts glasses* That's probably going to be the only smart thing he'll ever do.

Sabre thought for a moment,he couldn't fight because his leg was broken, he couldn't heal himself because Sabrina took his chaos emerald,he had no other choice.

Kyo: You ever tried those eagle claw techniques that take out an opponent's eye or heart?
Cassy: No more Kung Fu B-movies for you, dude.

"Okay,okay! Just let me go!" Sabrina let go of Sabre's neck and threw him on the ground.

Kyo, Jessie, Cassy: What an ass.
Miyu: I think that's the "protagonist centered morality" coming into play here.

"Sonic,Shadow! Watch him,I'll lead!"

Miyu: *as Sabrina* Go, my faithful servants! Do my bidding as I upstage you all!

Sonic and Shadow stopped and walked back towards Sabre and got on his left and right. "No way off the hook,Sabre! You are not getting away with this." Sonic and Shadow held him by the arms and dragged him through the palm forest. Soon,they found themselves in front of the large,metal tower. Sabrina stopped walking and turned around,facing Sabre. "Is this the place where you are hiding? Tell me!" Sabrina started choking him again until he managed to say a yes. "That's what I thought.Let's move in!"

Kyo: Yes, it's okay to treat evil people like complete shit when you're a good guy!

Sabrina,Sonic, and Shadow ran for the tower,they reached a large,metal door,it had a keypad next to it,Sabre talked again. "It needs a code.A passcode." Sabrina started choking him again and faced him at the keypad.Sabre pressed five buttons and then the giant door opened.

Miyu: *angrily smashes her glasses under her shoes* Look here, you abusive little asswipe! Did you ever think of saying "please" for one goddamned second?!
Kyo: *in a tiny voice* Holy crap.
Jessie: *quietly* Yep, Sabrina's now one huge horse's ass. And she hit that level pretty hard, I might add.
Miyu: *sternly* Am I out of glasses?
Cassy: *in a tiny voice* Yes.
Miyu: *sighs, rubs her head* I'll purchase a few more pairs during the next chapter.

Sonic looked around and saw many deactivated machines. "Looks like Eggman's kind of place." Sonic got an idea. "Hey guys! Hang on tight!" Sonic suddenly jumed high into the air and went through the ceiling,carrying Sabre with him. Shadow then jumped from there and landed on the next floor.Sabrina followed after them. "Good idea!" They all jumped from floor to floor,seeing no threats around them,they jumped about 25 more floors before reaching the top floor.

Kyo: I'm going to take a little page from Sonic's book and say that I don't care about this waste of a "paragraph".

They landed in a huge room,filled with many computers and machines.Sabrina put Sabre down and threatened him. "Alright Sabre,where's Eggman? If you don't tell us,we're going to do more deadly consequences!"

Jessie: Um, look here, Self-Insert Mary Sue... are you absolutely sure that Sabre's the evil one? Because when I look at this thing... it makes me want to break you in two instead of him.

Sabre lifted his arm and pushed a button on his spiked wristband.Suddenly,a door opened behind Sonic, Eggman walked out and the door closed. "Well,well,well,if it isn't my spikey little rodent,Sonic! What brings you here on my island?" Sonic walked up to him and got ready to punch him. "Eggman! What are you planning this time? And what's with your little friend?" He pointed over to the injured Sabre. "Gah! Sabre,what happened?"

Miyu: I'm doubting Eggman's 300 IQ now.
Cassy: I've always doubted it.

Eggman suddenly took a small device and pushed a button on it.An army of guard robots came out of nowhere and surrounded them on all sides.Eggman grabbed Sabre and ran away. Sonic,Shadow,and Sabrina were surrounded by the robots. "Seesh,some kind of welcoming committee this is!"

Kyo: *snickering* Eggman ran away... and Sonic couldn't catch him? Holy crap, I think we're in the 16-Bit era again!

Will Sonic and his friends survive the army of robots?

Cassy: Please say no.

Will Eggman unleash a new threat to the world?

Jessie: Please say yes.

Find out next time on Sabrina's Adventure!

Miyu: We don't care.

You better review or I'll go in rage on you!

Kyo: And you can bite our collective asses, Mary Sue. We're outta here.
*After the Black Crow members leave, two brown twin squirrels named Mai and Axl sit in Kyo and Miyu's seats, a male light blue hedgehog named Rory occupies Cassy's seat, and a blond-haired human male named James sits in Jessie's seat.*

Sabrina's Mutiny (Chapter 15)

Previously on Sabrina's Adventure...

Rory: Oh, I think we know what happened. Some Mary Sue angered the crap out of everyone and they actually left their house in anger!
Mai: That's one huge feat.

Sabrina,Sonic,and Shadow were fighting Sabre,Sabrina's twin brother.Sabre nearly killed Sabrina by throwing her into the ocean,but instead,he did the exact opposite.Sabrina went into her rage stage and attacked her brother with a mysterious dark energy ball.She knocked him out,Sonic and Shadow took the chaos emerald he had and took him with in order to find Dr. Eggman.All four hedgehogs found Eggman's base and entered it,they eventually found Eggman,but he sent out an army of guard robots.The army surrounded them and were ready to attack...

Axl: And this is for the people who didn't want to click the previous chapter link, huh?
James: Have you read the reviews, mate? Jessie said that they spoke for themselves.

Sonic,Sabrina,and Shadow were surrounded by Eggman's robots. "Just our luck! They got away!"

James: Who's talking?
Mai, Axl, Rory: *shrugs*

Sabrina started running at the robots and jumped over them.Shadow tried to stop her. "Sabrina! Don't be a fool!"

Rory: Hey, Cassy told me that she blindly went into the desert one time.
Mai: Without food or water?
Rory: Yep.
Mai: Oh. Let her die.

Sabrina didn't hear him and kept running after Eggman and Sabre.Sonic and Shadow started fighting the robot army and stayed behind. "Don't worry about her,Shadow,I think she can handle him."

Axl: And if she doesn't?
James: I'll stand up and cheer for the poor bastards that had to sit through the other chapters.

Sabrina was running in the direction Sabre and Eggman went,trying to find them.

Mai: I'm pretty sure we got that a moment ago, author.

She saw a robot and stopped,the robot quickly went after her,unfortunately,it caught up with her and started firing lasers at her. One hit her in the arm and made her fall,she got back up and looked at her arm,there strangely was no mark where the laser hit. "What?"

Axl: She knows that she can automatically heal. Why is she so surprised that she's not hurt?
James: Because she's a bloody dumbarse.

Suddenly,a small flying craft came out of nowhere,Eggman was in it. "MUAHAHAHAHAH!!"

Rory: Did you really need to add that evil laugh there?

Sabrina ran up to Eggman and tried to tackle his flying machine.

James: That 0.5 IQ really does come in handy sometimes.

Suddenly,Eggman pulled out a remote that had a button on it,he pushed the button,suddenly,Sabrina was shocked,making her scream. "RAAAAHHHH!!!!" Sabrina fell to the ground.

Rory: This author really wants us to know the dialogue that comes with all of the actions, huh?

Eggman laughed and got closer to Sabrina. "Well,it seems my latest invention is a complete success!" Sabrina slowly got back up. "What did you do to me,Eggman?" Eggman laughed again.

Axl: Um... muahahahahaha?

"You see,my little pet, my micro laser device fires micro chips that take effect only on living things,once these lasers hit their target,it will inject millions of probes that will control your whole body,with just a push of this little button,you will be shocked by electricity.You will do as I say,otherwise,your little friends will meet thier fate!" Eggman pushed another button,a monitor screen turned on and showed Sonic and Shadow being held in a prison cell. "NO!! Sonic,Shadow!!" The monitor screen turned off.

Mai: What the hell did they do? Just sit there with signs that said "Capture Us!" in big black letters?
Axl: Y'know, sis... at this rate, you might as well cheer for the bad guys to blow us all up.

"Please don't hurt them! I'll do anything! Just let them go!"

James: Anything, you say? Well, you can jump off a cliff and die. That'll please everyone.

Eggman made an evil grin and called in Sabre. Sabre walked in,completely healed.

Rory: Hey, didn't that guy have a broken leg?
Mai: Yes.
Rory: What'd they do, duct tape it up?
Mai: No. Miyu said that the Sue and her brother can heal via a Chaos Emerald.
Rory: Well, that's a little less dumb.

"What is it,doctor?" Sabre walked up to Sabrina and slapped her. Sabrina fell to the floor,crying.

Axl: Wait, she can destroy whole mobs, can heal herself, and can defeat others in one shot, but she falls down from a slap?!
James: I'm pretty sure that the reading audience wants to do more than slap her.

"Sabre,release the prisoners and get ready for takeoff!" Sabre kneeled down. "As you wish,doctor." Sabre left the room.

Mai: Did the guy scoot on his knees to leave?

Sonic and Shadow were somehow

All: Yes. Somehow.

captured by one of Eggman's robots and taken to a prison cell,chained to a wall.

Rory: Uh, did we just go back to the Middle Ages here?

"Man,we have got to get out of this place!" Shadow said while struggling.

Mai: What was your first clue, fair Shadow?

Sonic remained calm and still,saying nothing.Sonic heard a door open and close.Sabre walked in front of their cell and made an evil grin.

James: What's with all of the evil grins? Can grins be evil? I'd like to know that.

Shadow immediately yelled at him. "Where's Sabrina,you sick punk!?" Sabrina grinned again.

Axl: Did Sabre morph into his twin or something when we weren't lookin'?

"Your friend is with us now! Lucky for you,your lives will be spared."

Mai: *as Sabre* It's probably because if I kill you, the stupid will spread. We don't need any more "Jersey Shore" fans.

Sabre pushed a few button next to the cell.Sonic and Shadow's chain restraints opened,a door below them appeared. Sonic and Shadow fell through the floor and landed outside the building.Suddenly,a rumbling sound was heard,the ground started shaking.

Rory: A minotaur was released.

Then,Shadow saw the top of tower moving up into the air,it started going higher. "Sabrina!" Shadow started running towards the airborne ship,but the force from the ship's jets blew him and Sonic away.The flying ship took off into the sky.

James: And the final battle's probably going to be in space. I wonder where we've heard that before.

Shadow kneeled down to the ground and pounded his fist on the rock-solid ground. "No! Sabrina!" Sonic walked up to him and sat down. "Don't worry,Shadow.We'll get her back somehow.Eggman will pay for this!"

Axl: Shadow's somehow forgotten to use Chaos Control. Are you kidding me?
Mai: Actually, Shadow's Chaos Emerald was taken away earlier. Ironically, that was due to him being a bit... dense.

Suddenly,Sonic heard a sound. "Hey,do you hear that,Shadow?" Shadow stood up and looked around,he saw a small flying object in the sky. "Sonic,look! It's Tails!" Sonic looked up in the sky and saw the Tornado flying overhead. "Hey Tails!" Sonic started waving at the bi-plane,which turned and landed by the two hedgehogs.Tails hopped out of the cockpit and ran toward Sonic. "Tails,where were you?"

Rory: *as Tails* I was away from all of the fic's nonsense for a short while since I'm the only one with a brain left!

Tails pulled out a purple gem. "I found this chaos emerald at the beach! While you were fighting Sabre,I went to the beach and fixed up the Tornado! Where's Sabrina?"

Mai: And of course, everyone has to know where the Sue went.

Sonic and Shadow stared at the ground.

Axl, Rory: *as Sonic and Shadow, in childlike voices* We did a bad thing...
James: *as Tails* You killed her?
Axl, Rory: *as Sonic and Shadow, in childlike voices* Yes.
James: *as Tails* Oh. Don't worry about it.

"Eggman has her held hostage on his ship! We need to get her back!" Tails hopped into the plane and started it up. "Well what are you two waiting for! Let's go!" Sonic and Shadow jumped into the plane and took off. "Hey Tails! We also found a chaos emerald while you were gone." Sonic pulled out the white emerald. "Awesome! Now we have five chaos emeralds!" "Let's go!" Sonic shouted.The Tornado started moving towards the beach,moving very fast until it left the ground and flew into the sky,following the vessel's path.

James: How convenient. Maybe the other two are on the ship or in my butt.
Mai: Er... let's hope that they're on the ship.

Meanwhile on Eggman's ship...

Axl: Clark Kent was finding a way to -- whoops, wrong story.

Eggman has put Sabrina in a strange room filled with practice targets. "This is your training area,sister.Here,you will train to be the ultimate weapon of mass destruction."

Rory: Might as well hurry up with that training before George W. Bush finds you.

Sabre was the one in command of her.Sabrina was crying,being neglected by her own brother.

James: Hell, Jessie and those guys already neglected your poor bum.
Rory: Hurts being on the other end of the torture stick, huh?

"You can't control me,Sabre! No one can!"

Mai: *as Sabrina* Because I'm a Mary Sue! Nobody should control me at all! Kneel before me!
Axl: *looks at Mai* Okay...

Sabre pulled out the remote and pushed the button.

Rory: Holy crap, it's the remote, you guys! Now I can control Jupiter's moons!

Sabrina was shocked by electricity,she fell to the ground,struggling to get back up.

James: And then she died. Fin. Finito. The Bloody End.
Mai: Not quite.

"Oh,you think so? I don't.Let's begin training,shall we." Sabre pushed a button on the wall,several targets rose from the floor,looking like large buildings. "Attack,Sabrina!"

Axl: Use your Tackle attack!

Sabrina didn't do anything,she just stood still. "I-I can't! I don't want to destroy!" Sabrina refused to hit the targets. "I said attack!" Sabre pushed the button again,shocking Sabrina,forcing her to destroy the targets.

Rory: Did Paul from the Sinnoh arc turn into a hedgehog? Now he's abusing his siblings along with his Pokémon.

She ran at the targets,swiping at them with a weak force.They were instantly sliced in half,she ran at another target,kicking it,the target fell in pieces. Sabre was quite imressed. "Not bad for a beginner,sister.You need a more challenging test.Continue." Sabrina launched herself at another target,she started feeling more willing to do this,she used more force,she launched a punch at the target,the object was thrown to the wall of the room,smashing it to pieces.

Rory: Uh... what does destroying a bunch of fake buildings have to do with turning someone evil?
Axl: Hell if I know.
James: I'm bored. Can we go back to Sonic, Tails, and Shadow's dilemma?
Mai: The fic doesn't have their names in the title. Therefore, we can't do that.

"Excellent,sister.You are already starting to be like me.Time for the final test!" Sabre pushed another button,several targets came up from the floor,they were targets of Sonic,Tails,Knuckles,Amy,Cream,and Shadow.

Axl: Aww, now why would you want her to attack Cream? At least destroy the crap out of all of the targets except for hers and Tails's.
Mai: Uh, didn't they join in on the Shadow guilt tripping that Miyu told us about?
Axl: Oh. Never mind, nuke 'em all!

"Now sister,attack the targets!" Sabrina gasped and backed away.She couldn't bear the thought of her destroying her best friends,she refused to hit the targets.

James: Oh, just kill the cardboard and end this stupid sympathy crap!

"Noooo!! Don't make me do this,Sabre!" Sabre got angry and pushed the button again,Sabrina was shocked by electricity again,

Rory: And the redundancy repeated again.

she fell to the ground in pain,but she got back up and kept refusing. "What? You still refuse my orders? Well then,I'll have to crank up the heat!" Sabre turned a dial on the remote,then he pushed the button again,Sabrina was shocked again,this time the electricity was more powerful.

Mai: *sighs* Yes, I think we got that, author... again.
James: Wow, I'm feeling dumber already.

"AAAAAAHHHHH!!!" Sabrina had no other choice but to obey. She ran at the targets,getting ready to strike them. "Sonic,Shadow,Tails,Amy,Knuckles,Cream, I am sorry. I tried my best to protect the world.I know deeply that this is wrong,but I have no other choice.This..is...GOOD-BYE FOREVER!!"

Rory: Um... yeah. And?
Axl: Jeez, I've never seen such pointless rambling before! Just destroy them, will ya?!

Sabrina swiped at the targets,hitting them,destroying them.

Rory: Slicing them and dicing them with the new Ninja Cardboard Chopper...

Sabre was most impressed by this,he started clapping. "Well done,sister! You have finally passed the test!

James: What test? She only destroyed a bunch of fake crap!

You will now join me and Dr. Eggman on a glorious quest for world domination!" Sabrina walked up to Sabre and held her hand out,Sabre grabbed her hand and shook it." "Yes,brother,we will,we will indeed!"

Mai: That... has got to be the dumbest brainwashing scene that I have ever witnessed in my natural born life.

Will Sabre and Sabrina unleash a new threat to the world?

Rory: No.

Will Sonic,Tails,and Shadow find her and change her evil ways?

Axl: Yes.

Find out next time on Sabrina's Adventure!

Mai: We don't want to.

You better review or else!

James: That now officially kills any chance you had left for getting any reviews, love.

Message! I only have a few more chapters to do! For some strange reason,I have not been getting any reviews from anyone except Christinatails.

Rory: Because it's on MediaMiner and you don't accept anonymous reviews?
James: Because it's redundant as all holy hell?
Mai: Because you haven't brainwashed enough people and turned them into little grammar destroyers?
Axl: Because nobody likes your Mary Sue Self-Insert?

If I get at least 25 reviews after my fic is finished,me and Christinatails will put up a new Sonic school fic,featuring Sonic and his friends in high school! Everybody start reviewing! See ya in 2 days!

Axl: You know your fic blows rotten bananas when you bribe for reviews to put Sonic and Co. in high school.
Mai: This is complete proof that originality was dead from the get go.

--

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