Mystery Science Theater En Masse

Egg Spiral Crew, Episode 8: Saranghamnida (Part One)

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Warning: Part Two of this riffing contains a mild sex scene.

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Saranghamnida

Sonic, Manic, Amy: Huh? What?
Sonic: Anybody know how to pronounce that?
Amy: Forget that, I want to know how many syllables are in it!
Manic: Hell, I'd like to know if that's even a word!
Sonia: It is; it means "I love you" in Korean, which refers to elder members of your family.
Sonic, Manic, Amy: Oh!

By: JunkeeMunkeeKazama

Manic: At least that's pronounceable.

Disclaimer: I do not own Tekken and its characters.

Sonic: Thank goodness for that.
Sonia: Sonic...

Author's note: This is my very own and very first Tekken fanfic.

Sonic: That don't mean that we're going easy on you.

This was inspired by the song "Te Amo" by Rihanna, and I've put my own little spin on it using one of my favorite Tekken characters (You all should know him by now)

Manic: But, we don't!
Amy: Is it Jin?
Sonia: Or is it Hwoarang?
Sonic: Which one's live and which one's Memorex, ladies?

and one of my very own characters. I'll try to make my stories less boring.

Manic: Well, we don't know if your stuff's boring yet.

So other than that, enjoy!

Sonic: *sips his cola as he leans back in his seat* Oh, I'll enjoy what's to come.

Rating: T (subject to change)

All: Which it did.

Chapter 1:

The Extra Credit Mission

Amy: Oh, no! Not another student-teacher scandal! We already have enough of those!

For Primavera Verde, the day has come.

Sonia: ...for her to find a less embarrassing name.
Amy: "Spring Green"? Seriously?
Manic: That's what it meant? I thought that it sounded more like a pasta dish.

She, a college sophomore, has just finished her final exams and was sho' ready to be on Christmas Break,

Sonic: Fo' shizzle!
Sonia, Manic, Amy: Oh, god...

and must I tell you, the final exam history consisted of THREE effin' parts: a PowerPoint presentation, an acting presentation, and an actual exam.

Manic: Holy crap, an actual exam... in an exam! Damn, those paper tests are so effin' difficult, yo!

Boy, she could not find any better excuse to pass out...

Sonia: ...and fail as she drools on her tests in the process...

other than the two annoying grapeheads, Asuka Kazama and Ling Xiaoyu. Daaaaaaaaaaarrrrnnn, why do they have to walk towards her?

Amy: Because they wanted to talk to you?

"Primavera, Primavera, Primavera!" they both yell to her.

Sonia: I guess they couldn't find her brothers Verano, Otoño, or Invierno.

"Dang, do ya'll have to blow out my ear drums!" said the now annoyed Primavera.

Sonic: Dang, talking properly is too hard, homies! Give me some skin!
Manic: I have never wanted to hit you so hard before, bro.

"Heck yeah, 'cause its Christmas break!" screamed Asuka. The both scream once again, causing Primavera to take out the black Ipod, put those white headphones on, blast the music loud, and just simply walk away from their little celebration.

Amy: At this rate, she's going to go deaf at twice the speed.

"Hey, she just left!" said Xiaoyu.

Sonia: Good. Now you guys can go back into your original personalities.

"What? She left? Aww, don't worry. I'm pretty sure that we'll run into her... DURING CHRISTMAS BREAK!" said Asuka as they continued celebrating.

Manic: Why would I want to run into her? This pasta girl sounds a lot more stuck-up than Sonia!
Sonia: Thanks for the... "compliment", Manic.

Okay, Primavera Verde? Asuka? Xiaoyu? Run into each other during Christmas Break? Yeah, right!

Amy: And this fic having a plot? That ain't gonna be happenin', either!

Without even thinking about the girls, she continued strolling down to her dorm room and settle herself down.

XxX

Sonic: Starring Vin Diesel.

After long, cold snowy walk to her room, Primavera helped herself to some graham crackers, some milk, and to her desk.

Sonia: I heard that a special varnish can give off a smoky flavor.
Manic: Maybe the splinters count as sprinkles.

However, after she took a good look around her desk, she noticed the plane ticket for her flight to South Korea.

Amy: Not to mention that huge bite mark on the side of said desk.

She grabbed the ticket and took one more wee bit look at it again. Oh, snap!

Sonic: She got clowned, yo!
Sonia, Manic, Amy: Shut up, Sonic!
Sonic: Okay, okay! Jeez!

The flight was booked for tomorrow morning and she has not even packed yet! A total slap in the face!

Amy: Maybe one of the readers slapped her in the face with the tickets.

Then her best friend and roommate, Julia Chang, walks in.

"Hey, girl." greeted Julia.

"Hey." Primavera responded.

"Ready for South Korea?"

Uh, give her some time to think about it.

Amy: Really? How long does it take for her to say "no"?
Manic: After all of the slang so far, I'd say that she had to shuffle through it all to actually say "no" without adding "yo".
Sonia: Much like your own vernacular, Manic.
Manic: *scowls*

"No, I have not yet packed yet."

Sonia: Yet. Oh, wait.

"Uh-oh. Looks like you better get going, my friend, or you'll be late for the flight."

Sonic: Actually, the airline decided to make it a rather early flight. Too bad. The End.

"Maybe if it had not been for the three-part final exam and those goofballs, then maybe I would've been ready."

Amy: Oh, god forbid that we needed to have a final exam to see if you've retained what you've learned in your tiny brain!

"Hey, it's not my fault."

"I'm not saying its your fault."

Sonia: It's my fault that I had to read this.

"Oh. Well, I'm saying is that I best suggest that you start packing now because were leaving out of here early in the morning."

"Imma get to it."

And got to it she did.

Sonic: Thrill as Primavera does... whatever she just did!
Manic: She was packing, bro.
Sonic: That's it? Packing? Watching "Crossroads" would be a lot more exciting than this.

"Don't forget the passport, your driving accomodations, and the effin' camera for some pictures.

Amy: Yeah, you effin' tourist!

Forget those three simple thing and youuuuuuuuuuu're outta here."

Sonia: I didn't know that Julia went to an umpire school.

"Now do I want to whoop ya head or what. I know what I'm doing, Nature Valley."

All: Huh?

Julia Chang likes nature. Nature, Nature Valley granola bars, get it?

Sonia, Manic, Amy: *facepalms*
Sonic: You're not funny, Olivia Munn.

"Let's hope you get it, Bimbo. But seriously though, get packing."

"Girl, you not my momma!." Primavera said as she continues packing.

Manic: I wonder if she got her speaking lessons from the Everest Guy.

Let's hope that she, Julia, and the three others don't have to pop each others necks before the flight.

Amy: Who are the three others? Care to elaborate?
Sonia: Aside from that, popping a neck would be a part of the world's worst massage.

XxX

Sonic: State of the Union.
Manic: Man, nobody saw that movie. Come on.

Here they are at the dining hall and Primavera is having her lunch, pretty much consisting of rice, sweet and sour chicken, egg rolls, green tea, and an ice cream sundae... her favorite combination.

Manic: Hey, where's her desk?
Sonic: I hope she's not eating that in one huge pile.
Sonia: It's amazing that of all the things that lacked detail, the author puts it into what the pasta dish is eating.

Meanwhile, another one of her friends and one her travel aquaintances, Jin Kazama,

Sonic: Before he started World War III, mind you.

comes to her table with the same darn lunch combinations she has.

Amy: Because coincidences are terrible, kids! Never accidentally think alike!

They've been best friend, and copied off one anothers style, since high school, except Jin was Homecoming king and Primavera was a member of the National Honors Society.

Manic: I hate to add a stereotype, but... I don't think that that honors stuff'll fly with that poor language and stinky attitude.

Yet, the smart and the popular were very, very, close friends.

Sonic: And this is beginning to sound very, very Sue-ish.

"Dang, boy, do you have to copy my style every time?" Primavera jokingly asked.

"Dang, girl, do you have to complain about stuff every time?" Jin responded, rather sarcastic.

Sonia: Oh, dang! Must we sound like bad 90's rips, yo?

"Chill, dude, I was just joking. Why you being sarcastic?"

Amy: "Chill, dude"? Is that surfer slang?
Manic: At this rate, we could invite Cassy to this riffing.

"Xiaoyu and Asuka... thet get on me effin' nerves!

Sonic: *as Jin* They also stole me Lucky Charms!
Amy: Ling Xiaoyu is one of the few people that he actually cares about. And she's somehow getting on his nerves?
Sonia: You know we're in a bad fanfic when that's happening.

Somebody needs to crash the woo-hoo celebration they having over there. They've been doing that for the last 4 hours."

Manic: God forbid that they should celebrate Christmas break.

"Same here, Jin, same here."

"Aww, shoot, here they come. Hide!"

Amy: Elementary school's so scandalous, yo!

Not wanting to take any chances with those two airheads,

Sonic: You mean "Jin" and Spring Snob there?

Jin and Primavera hide under the table as Jin's so-called "woo-hoo celebration" approaches. Unfortunately for them, Xiaoyu forgot her I.D. and were not allowed in.

All: *flatly* How convenient.

Thier "woo-hoo's" turned into boo's as the leave the dining area. Primavera and Jin got back up and gave each other hi-five's.

Sonia: Oh, my! A bunch of college kids won Hide-and-Seek! We must alert the presses!

Another one of her traveling acquaintances, Steve Fox, joins them.

Manic: And the boring uppity party continues!

"Man, Asuka and Xiaoyu's woo-hoo celebration is getting out of control." said Steve.

"And way out of proportion!" added Jin. Julia sits in with them.

Sonic: If they end up celebrating, I'm going to throw all of their hypocritical butts through windows.

"Wh-w-wh-w-wh wait a minute. No mo' talkin til I'm in it. What is this about?" Julia rhymed and asked.

Amy: *clenches her fists* What did they do to you, Miss Chang?!

"Y-yo y-yo. About dey lame ol' celebration. So loud it blew my concentration. I 'bout ready ta crash dat party. Throwin' some custard and some pasteries. Like dat. Yeeeah, like dat. Throw dem at dey face. Like dat-dat." rhymed Jin.

Manic: Let's keep going with Bad Stereotype Theater. All we're missing is some weed and a few 40-ounces now.
Sonia: I think that my IQ has just dropped into the negatives after reading that, guys.

They all give him a hi-five,

Sonic: And I gave him the finger for that crappy rapping.

including the last of Primavera's traveling acquaintances, Emilie de Rochefort a.k.a. Lili.

Amy: Last I checked, Lili wouldn't be caught dead with people who idolized Snoop Dogg.

"I heard it from the lunch line." said Lili. "Seriously, though, their celebration is annoying as hell."

Manic: And so is this fic.
Amy: Have we even reached a plot point yet?!

"Couldn't say anything better." said Julia.

"Get Mr. Doo San on 'em!" said Primavera.

Sonia: I'll get him... to kick you in the head.

"Good idea." said Jin. Then they see the principal, Mr. Baek Doo San, walking to find a table. They call him over to the table and he decided to have a seat with them.

Amy: Gasp as Baek tries to find a lunch table!

"Hey guys, what are you up to?" said Mr. Doo San

"Nothing." said Jin.

Sonic: Being a stuck-up doofus isn't exactly "nothing", "Jin".

"What are you doing this Christmas break?"

"All of us are going to South Korea for a little vacation." said Primavera.

"South Korea, huh?"

"Yeah. Well have a lot of fun. I promise."

Sonia: Maybe they'll accidentally find themselves in North Korea after a hiking trip.
Manic: Oh, please let that happen.
Amy: I'm confused. Who's talking?!
Manic: The shells of their former selves, that's who.

"You know that I was actually born in South Korea, right?"

"Were you, really?" asked Lili.

Sonic: *as Baek* No, I was born in Sweden. Lars is my second cousin. What do you think?!

"Yes. I lived in an mountainous in Seoul, the capital city. I also owned a dojo in which I train people in the art of Tae Kwon Do while I was living there."

Manic: I have a question! Was your dojo next to Kim Kaphwan's?

"Did you have a favorite student while you were a dojo master?" asked Jin.

Amy: You should know, "Jin"; fangirls pair you up with him all the time! There's probably another fic of that being written as we speak!

He laughs. "Well, I had one who is an amazing athelete. I was really impress of what he contributed to my dojo. He lives there in South Korea. I must say that he hangs around the streets a lot. So you really gonna have keep an eye out for him."

"What is his name?" asked Primavera.

"His name is Hwoarang. At least that is his street name. I don't know his real name. He never told me his real name. I'm not saying to stay away from him, though. I'm just letting you know that he's down there."

Manic: *as Baek* But yeah, stay away from him. Especially since he never said his real name and hangs out in the streets.
Sonia: They talk like they're from the streets. I guess we're even.

"Well, we'll keep an eye out for him, Mr. Doo San."

"I know you all will."

Sonia: Unfortunately, Hwoarang decided to take a trip to America that day. Oh, well.

"Speaking of looking out, look out for Asuka and Xiaoyu's woo-hoo party that had been going on all day." said Steve. "They are approaching now."

Sonic: Aww, the poor whiny snobs complain and hide instead of trying to shut them up themselves. When's your next breast feeding and diaper changing, huh?

"I will take care of that now."

With that said, Mr. Doo San notices them walking down the dining hall stairway. still having thier Christmas Break woo-hoo celebration.

Manic: I don't want to hear "woo-hoo" again... unless it's from Amy. And she don't even say it that much.

He walks up to them to give Asuka and Xiaoyu, not only a warning, but a citation for noise violation.

Sonia: I'm guessing that the author hates those girls with a passion.
Sonic: It could've been one hell of a lot worse, sis.

Asuka tried to convince to him that they weren't all that loud, but he didn't care and gave them the citation.

Manic: Just like a corrupt cop trying to get paid!

After all that was taken care of, Mr. Doo San walks back to Primavera's table.

"How old is Hwoarang?" Primavera asked.

"He's just about your age. I don't want to reveal too much about him. He's a mystery for you to find out."

Amy: I thought the fact that his real name's unknown is enough of a mystery! This fic's confusing!

"Awwwwwww, Mr. Doo San! Why won't you give the full detail already?" asked Steve.

All: Because it's a mystery, you whiny idiot!

"It is an assignment I want you all to complete: Find Hwoarang sometime during your vacation. I'll give you extra credit if you do."

Sonic: There's even more extra credit if the Spring Snob kisses or bangs him.

"I say that's a deal. I could really use some extra credit." said Jin.

Manic: You already had that and then some.
Sonia: Manic...

"Me too." said Lili.

"Well, all you'll have to do is find Hwoarang sometime during your vacation." said Mr. Doo San.

Amy: Did the author hire the Dur-hay announcer guy from "Hell's Kitchen" and "MasterChef" to play Baek?
Sonic: *as the "Hell's Kitchen"/"MasterChef" announcer* The friends must travel to South Korea and locate the mysterious Hwoarang for extra credit. If they find him during their Christmas break, they will get extra credit.
Manic: *as the "Hell's Kitchen"/"MasterChef" announcer* Did we mention that they'll get extra credit if they find Hwoarang?

"You've got yourself a deal, Mr. Doo San." said Julia as Primavera shakes the principal's hand.

Sonia: She managed to act like best friends with the principal? Really? Could she be any more Sue-like?
Amy: I thought we were in college. Shouldn't "dean" be the correct term?

They all have talked about the trip, Asuka's and Xiaoyu's stupid woo-hoo celebration, and thier mission to find Hwoarang.

Manic: They also left out "Primavera and her friends' failure at rapping".
Amy: Woo-hoo! Let's find Hwoarang! Dur-hay!

Boy, this is going to be one heck of a trip.

All: And this is gonna suck.

XxX

So what did you think?

Manic: Honestly? I'd rather read about that "Grrrl Powah!" hedgehog again.

Hopefully it wasn't boring.

All: It was.

You're welcome to give some feedback and some suggestions.

Amy: Riffing's feedback, right?
Sonic: You better hope that she doesn't find us through Google, Ames.

More chapters will be put up soon.

Sonia: As if this one wasn't painful enough.

Until next chapter, sayonara!

JunkeeMunkeeKazama

Sonic: Now there's Japanese stuff, too? Jeez, I know that Tekken has an international cast, but... what the hell does this fic have, anyway?
Manic: No plot points.

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